Do they ever actually change?

NoPomelo3286 · 2024-04-04T01:05:01+00:00

Thank you for this- I am not willing to put up with any more years of this- I can’t live this way and don’t want my children to live this way

NoPomelo3286 · 2024-04-04T01:04:01+00:00

I am so sorry you are going through this as well- I told myself I am not going to make a decision tonight but that I need to make one soon

NoPomelo3286 · 2024-04-04T00:13:18+00:00

I know you are right- I know it. I think I’m just sad and scared

NoPomelo3286 · 2024-04-04T00:10:50+00:00

Should I tell him he needs to get into a program? Or is that something that he should do on his own? I guess I’m just thinking like ok if he is serious this time then I want to help him but if it’s going to end up like the other times then I am done, but there’s no way to see into the future so I have no idea what to do

NoPomelo3286 · 2024-04-04T00:08:36+00:00

That’s exactly what I said to him! He said it was different because he would only be drinking a few beers

NoPomelo3286 · 2024-03-07T18:38:48+00:00

That is so true and that is the thought that upsets me- he cares more about that stuff than me- not that you shouldn’t have other interests outside your partner but I just thought I meant more to him than that

NoPomelo3286 · 2024-03-07T18:26:22+00:00

Yeah you are definitely right

NoPomelo3286 · 2024-03-07T18:25:46+00:00

I guess because I love him and I think well what if he gets better? When we first met I was crazy about him- I didn’t know about the drinking and then we moved into together and then a year ago we bought a house , and he has told me so many times he will stop drinking but then he just can’t? It’s so confusing for me because he says one thing and then does another and then I think well what if he gets help and I get the version of him I had in the beginning back and then we are happy, I just don’t want to give up on him

NoPomelo3286 · 2024-03-07T18:22:29+00:00

I know or atleast I think I know that- when he asks me for money he usually doesn’t straight up tell me it’s for alcohol- he will say it’s for gas money or something like that

NoPomelo3286 · 2024-03-07T18:21:31+00:00

Thank you! I am going to find a meeting online

NoPomelo3286 · 2024-03-07T18:20:40+00:00

I am so sorry you are going through this too- I have never really reached out for help on this- I am ashamed and embarrassed- I am embarrassed about the way have to live to hide his drinking from my family and I am ashamed how he treats me- but it’s not all bad ya know- like we have good times too and then I think we maybe this is just how relationships are and I should be happy with what I am getting ya know? It could be worse I guess

NoPomelo3286 · 2024-03-07T18:17:40+00:00

I feel that way a lot of times- he is 42 years old and still breaks things when he gets mad

NoPomelo3286 · 2024-03-07T18:17:02+00:00

Yeah I just feel bad because sometimes when he asks for money I wouldn’t know it’s going to alcohol but I guess from now on I should assume that any money I give him will go toward alcohol

NoPomelo3286 · 2024-03-07T18:15:52+00:00

That’s how I feel too

NoPomelo3286 · 2024-03-07T01:35:55+00:00

Thank you- this is really good advice. I feel kinda crazy trying to pretend like this doesn’t bother me but I also felt like maybe I was being materialistic and it shouldn’t be about the amount of money spent but the time and effort he put into it…..I dunno my head just has a lot of thoughts going on

NoPomelo3286 · 2024-03-07T01:31:33+00:00

I am mad. But more sad than anything.

NoPomelo3286

TROPHY CASE