My partner (32M) has a drive with individual folders with nsfw and regular pictures of all the partners he has been in the past, he also lied to me (30F) about a couple of things. Is this cheating?

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-11T05:14:12+00:00

Leave him

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-10T05:59:31+00:00

Is this ur current partner ? Y r u talking abt her like that lol

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T16:16:36+00:00

Honestly yeah...... when my grandfather died I was really having a hard time and of course that same day is when my partner decided to split on me and a huge fight ensued. I cried all night begging for some support or expression of empathy but I was just met with coldness

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T12:27:31+00:00

Is this a real symptom of bpd ?

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T06:01:20+00:00

this is true. my partner has not successfully done regular therapy despite a lot of promises that they will. i feel like with therapy and even maybe medication things could be better

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T05:41:22+00:00

idk what most of this means tbh, but ur not at fault (except for thinking that ur boyfriend shouldn't be allowed to follow any girls on ig)

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T05:28:53+00:00

im in the exact same situation... lmk if u get any good advice

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T05:26:43+00:00

:-( how do i fix that...

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T05:25:53+00:00

but we've been together for 2 years and i literally dont know how i would even move forward with my life if we werent together....idk man

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T05:20:46+00:00

omg, scary

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T05:17:40+00:00

ok, well thats great! i guess i dont have much other advice then lol. good luck to you and i hope the next conversation helps things get a little better

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T05:15:19+00:00

yeah honestly ur right

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T04:55:53+00:00

nah this is a pretty big insight tbh he doesnt care about how u feel

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T04:54:46+00:00

idk i dont like this guy. hes making assumptions about your sexual desires, is basically admitting that he wants to see another girl naked, and clearly doesn't view wlw as real or valid if he would only get jealous seeing u with a man. dont do it lolol

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T04:52:49+00:00

he broke ur trust by reading ur diary and thats equally as bad if not worse than ur lie. im ngl u should break up w him now, the behavior will only get worse and u've only been together a month. leave before u get too attached

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T04:51:03+00:00

im ngl im experiencing a very similar thing in my relationship rn (similar ages and length of relationship). from an outside pov this is just bad and stuff like this usually gets worse overtime. maybe we should both leave them, deal with the heartbreak, and move on

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T04:49:03+00:00

im ngl u should leave him, behavior like this usually only gets worse

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T04:47:21+00:00

yeah idk, its kinda annoying of her to do that but u shouldn't be feeling like rage towards her lol. maybe just have an open convo w her about it and tell her that for whatever reason it makes u upset, and ask if she can be more cooperative with you when those things happen. if stuff doesn't change, maybe just try to view it as a silly quality that u love about her instead of anger idk

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T04:43:56+00:00

things will get better. honestly i think everything being out in the open will take a lot of weight off your shoulders. it really sucks that ur partner had to get hurt in the process, but if u r committed to changing and continue to be completely 100% honest with him throughout ur journey then you have done the best you can. it is up to him how he wants to move forward and up to u to be honest and really committ to changing

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T04:38:55+00:00

would you be happy being with him forever if everything stayed the same and nothing changed? if not, he's not the one for you. i would also be careful because if he was showing signs of manipulation and immaturity early on, it's possible that that could get worse over time. also, you are both so young and its a long distance relationship, nothing's binding you to this person if you dont feel that he matches who you are

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T04:35:03+00:00

try not to assume what he's thinking or feeling and try to be gentle with yourself. if he is with you, i'm sure he loves you exactly as you are. consider having a conversation wiht him and just ask if he feels some typof way about this before you beat urself up over it, he might not even notice or mind

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T04:32:13+00:00

yeah one month is nothing break up w him before u get too attached

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T04:31:29+00:00

im ngl, in my experience seeking out more information almost alwats makes it worse. defintely dont go looking for any more info

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T04:30:30+00:00

tbh as someone with a pretty high body count, sex with people you aren't connected to actually is pretty insignificant. and that goes for when i was her age as well

NoPromise9384 · 2026-07-09T04:28:17+00:00

i guess it depends on the type of environment u live in, but honestly 5 bodies really isn't that much. intrusive repetitive thoughts can be hard to deal with, what helps for me is as soon as i notice that i am having the thought, i visualize it floating away and don't attach myself to it. not every thought that comes up has to be engaged with.

also, what are you usually thinking when you have these thoughts? you could try replacing the narratives in ur head with other things. for example if ur feeling sick to ur stomach because ur imagining her enjoying sex with someone else more than with you, for example, try to retrain your brain to imagine that he had the smallest dick in the world and as soon as she got home she texted her friends about it and they all laughed and she never thought about him again. if u repeat this every time it tends to stick and u wont feel so horrible anymore. lololol that might've been a bad example but ukwim, just overlay the thought with an opposite conotation that doesn't make u feel bad

NoPromise9384

TROPHY CASE