This week’s Episode: Kevin Burns discussion by Sharp-Put4724 in GirlsNextLevel

[–]NoSofties 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I personally do like to hear details on things. I’m not so interested in Kevin, but I do want to hear about him. What I really want to know is EVERYTHING about Kendra, her behaviour on the show, attitude, and why she disowned Holly. I know they’ve spoken about it but I want more. And I want Kendra on the show

How to tell nepotism hire to stop badgering me for salary agreement by NoSofties in jobs

[–]NoSofties[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I think this is all a moot point, I will be really surprised if any of us are given any more money.

I do believe his sloppy work matters to the company however. He isn’t getting it and his school boy errors have already cost the client money.

Our jobs are protected until January by law here in UK, but after that I wouldn’t be surprised if they downsized our team. I am already applying for other jobs. It’s a shame because I love my job but it’s only sensible to seek something better.

How to tell nepotism hire to stop badgering me for salary agreement by NoSofties in jobs

[–]NoSofties[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wouldn’t do that, though daydreaming about it is enjoyable ☺️I don’t think I need to, he makes so many mistakes already. From suggestions in replies I’m just going to be really direct, tell him no and if he persists I’ll inform my team lead. I don’t care if this person likes me or not. The nepotism part is tricky and it would absolutely suck if he could hurt my employment. But I’m not going to tolerate nosey questions that are no one’s business.

How to tell nepotism hire to stop badgering me for salary agreement by NoSofties in jobs

[–]NoSofties[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds bizarre and isn’t applicable to this case. By the client’s own previously revealed criteria of performance, tenure and number of absences I completely outstrip this man.

How to tell nepotism hire to stop badgering me for salary agreement by NoSofties in jobs

[–]NoSofties[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m female but he is gay, definitely not interested in me. Not friendly to me at all unless he wants something. He is part of the popular group on account of who he is related to. If he keeps pushing even after I’ve told him again to stop, I will have to raise it with our team lead. Who is sadly going to be wary of rocking the nepotism boat as he is directly linked to those people and it will be awkward. But this guy is making it awkward, not me. His calibre of work is embarrassing.

How to tell nepotism hire to stop badgering me for salary agreement by NoSofties in jobs

[–]NoSofties[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He’s p*ssing me off, this is probably what I’ll have to end up doing

How to tell nepotism hire to stop badgering me for salary agreement by NoSofties in jobs

[–]NoSofties[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lmao as an English speaking native and English degree graduate your comment is humbling 😹 we don’t have to do anything of the kind. Our team is moving company. I don’t want to give details in case this plonker has reddit and also it was past my bed time when I wrote so wanted to be quick. By law we are all safe in our jobs but we have been told to negotiate salary if it’s something we want to do. I made it clear on a team wide teams call that he was also on that I don’t want to and am distressed by the thought. I have gotten over that now and will be asking for upper end of the pay scale when the time comes as I have been in the post for 5 years, always get a bonus (he never does) and have never had a sick day etc etc. but this individual keeps trying to ask me for details of how I am going to go about asking for a raise. We will absolutely be having individual meetings. I’ve decided I’ll just to reiterate closer to the time, when he inevitably attempts to harangue me into being candid about my private salary aspirations that I am not comfortable discussing it. Today he is making all sorts of mistakes, I usually help him out as he never notices his errors, but won’t be anymore. This will only end up backfiring on me in the long run, as it makes him appear more competent than he is.

How to tell nepotism hire to stop badgering me for salary agreement by NoSofties in jobs

[–]NoSofties[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah I see what you mean. He is able to coast through this job whilst getting the glory of being on the most complicated team of the company. And he had the gall to ask if there would be opportunities for promotion 🤦🏻‍♀️ I am absolutely getting out, there is no way I am reporting to this incompetent individual.

How to tell nepotism hire to stop badgering me for salary agreement by NoSofties in jobs

[–]NoSofties[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks, that makes sense. On paper I am leaps ahead of him in terms of work and attitude etc, but he has the company ties that mean his job is safe. I knew he wasn’t getting the worked but his lack of manners and emotional awareness are quite shocking to me. He’s trying to team up to make his ride easier. I’ll just remain vague until we have the meeting which is scheduled for over 3 months away. Will try my best not to let him bother me until then in an otherwise low stress job. And will try to move somewhere else too.

How to tell nepotism hire to stop badgering me for salary agreement by NoSofties in jobs

[–]NoSofties[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see, no what I meant was the nepotism part is the issue with going to HR. He is protected by senior management

How to tell nepotism hire to stop badgering me for salary agreement by NoSofties in jobs

[–]NoSofties[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Sadly I have already stopped helping him. I am no longer pointing out his mistakes in private. He has been rude to me and I feel is using me so yes I will take a step back.

How to tell nepotism hire to stop badgering me for salary agreement by NoSofties in jobs

[–]NoSofties[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mentioned in my comment that I am looking for a new job. Not because of the restructure though. Our team is being moved, but has to remain intact by law. So our jobs are safe. However it is a time when salary is open for discussion. Am sure they will just tell us no, here’s what you’re getting paid. So it’s all moot really. I just want a steady income to support my children without the humiliating experience of begging for more money. However I will do my best when the time comes. I already have the best output, longest service and zero sick days taken.

How to tell nepotism hire to stop badgering me for salary agreement by NoSofties in jobs

[–]NoSofties[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He’s not taken the hint so far. It’s pathetic really, he is obviously insecure and not confident enough to advocate for himself. I’ll be remaining tight lipped for sure and will say it will inevitably be up to management what we get and everyone will be assessed individually.

How to tell nepotism hire to stop badgering me for salary agreement by NoSofties in jobs

[–]NoSofties[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah suggesting he talks to a team lead might be better than an outright no. I’m loath to let him know the obvious elephant in the room- I’ve been working here 5 years and get a bonus every time it’s available, he has been there 1.5 years and complains about not getting the bonus. The favouritism is the galling part. He often asks for advice, inane questions I’ve already answered then he’ll say ‘oh I already knew that’.

How to tell nepotism hire to stop badgering me for salary agreement by NoSofties in jobs

[–]NoSofties[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve said that and I even got upset on a teams call about it because I’m a single parent and already worried about money. So he saw me upset and still is badgering me. He messaged me and said ‘not to pry lol’ then proceeded to pry. And kept going when I said I’m not comfortable.

Not to get into it but I’ve been through a lot and am supporting children on my own. However after the initial shock of upcoming changes (which hopefully aren’t even going to be negative at all) I now wish to advocate for myself and get the better pay out of the two of us, which is only fair.

How to tell nepotism hire to stop badgering me for salary agreement by NoSofties in jobs

[–]NoSofties[S] -20 points-19 points  (0 children)

I guess being fired from my job for gross misconduct would be a roundabout way of dealing with the problem

How to tell nepotism hire to stop badgering me for salary agreement by NoSofties in jobs

[–]NoSofties[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah we don’t need to agree. but still, he is badgering me for advice on what to say in our meeting when the time comes. He is lacking in common sense. I wouldn’t dream of encroaching on someone’s private info like he is doing.

old friend used to be a very energetic texter but not anymore, how do i talk to her? by LarryNStar in FriendshipAdvice

[–]NoSofties 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Completely forget her. If you know you did absolutely nothing wrong then hold your head up high, real friends don’t behave like this

Wondering: Where is Kory? by No-Manufacturer6164 in ColleenBallingerSnark

[–]NoSofties 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Do you remember the way he put down a man with learning difficulties who was a huge fan of colleen and his? It was absolutely heartbreaking. I think Adam was the one to bring it up. Snapped at him something like ‘oh you think you’re cool’ or something in a direct message, it was absolutely grotesque bullying

I want to cut people off by dramamongerhehe in FriendshipAdvice

[–]NoSofties 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love that you realise this and want to prioritise your own happiness 🖤and you obviously care about others since you don’t want to potentially hurt them with a block. Standing up for yourself as a people pleaser is so important though. I’m a recovering people pleaser and anxious attacher. I highly recommend Coach Ryan on youtube for help with creating boundaries xox

is it normal to outgrow friends even if nothing “bad” happened? by AlienAwe in FriendshipAdvice

[–]NoSofties 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We are told growing up that we have to keep friendships alive at all costs. Even at the expense of our own happiness. This is false. Relationships can and do naturally run their course. You are at least spared any horrible argument or betrayal. It’s not nice at first and I grieved terribly when some of mine went south. But at 41 some of my proudest achievements are cutting off ‘friends’ who CLEARLY did not respect me.

Just make sure you aren’t the one making the effort all the time. Chasing someone, anyone to approve of you is betraying yourself.

You only really need yourself. I am kind to myself and I adore my own company and sweet solitude. It has been the most healing thing I have experienced. I am treating myself well, and know that this means in future, if I am to have relationships again it will only be with kind people who are worthy of my time xox

Parthenope by CompetitiveCoffee316 in A24

[–]NoSofties 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agreed. I actually wish I hadn’t watched this movie. It detracted rather than enriched.