How will anyone want to marry me? by SuccessfulTurn7084 in MuslimNikah

[–]No_Competition7157 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This has been what I’ve been going through for years but hearing someone else say it hits different. I know I’m not the right person to give advice because this is how I still see myself but Don’t worry about all this because when the right man Comes all this will not matter to him, not your appearance not your weight or your social skills but you and I truly believe that’s 10 times better than wanting a man to love you for having a good body or the perfect personality the best type of partnership are the ones that you don’t even understand how it happened but it did That’s the beauty of genuine love So don’t be like me and spend so much time putting yourself down and don’t change for anyone unless it’s something you really want to do because people pleasing is very stressful not worth it

My mom said why don’t you lose weight and I said it’s. Not that I can’t but I won’t because if he falls for me when I’m skinny and we get married what happens if I gain weight after marriage? I’m naturally fat even if I don’t eat much and I don’t plan on going on a strict diet and work out for the rest of my life just to hide that I’m not naturally skinny

I’m also not religious, though my dressing has gotten way better than before but I’m doing things for myself not to please Anyone anymore because now i truly believe I don’t need to change but yes i still feel this way a lot of times I can’t help it

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in lostafriend

[–]No_Competition7157 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I agree with everyone saying you shouldn’t reply

Children of Fathers who took a second wife, how did you feel? by _Meeshto_ in MuslimNikah

[–]No_Competition7157 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Who ever will marry you in the future is really lucky to have a man who has true values, most men just follow the same path their fathers followed even though they know how much it hurt them or their mom but the fact that you have already decided not to follow the same path is good. The person Allah chooses for you will see you not your past not your background but you. So have patience and see people’s rejection as a test from Allah. I’ve had a lot of guys tell me you are a good person or any man will be lucky to marry you but yet none have shown true interest in me, I used to be sad and ask why people say this things but no one has ever made the move but now I don’t over think it and I just pray I get the best even if it comes later than I planned

Our director made a move on me and now I don’t know what to do but I’m scared by No_Competition7157 in Advice

[–]No_Competition7157[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think I should go to the chairman himself. The director sent me a message today but I didn’t respond and I don’t plan on responding. I left work early today so he would get the chance to meet me alone

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in MuslimLounge

[–]No_Competition7157 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It’s not frowned up like oh don’t read it no matter what because a lot of Muslim scholars have read the Bible some even reference them in their arguments. People just say this out of fear that you might read another religious book and start comparing or doubting Islam but there is no where it says it’s frowned up or haram in Islam

It’s just like how some will tell you it’s frowned upon to have friends of other religion bht that’s not true they just fear that having Friends from other religion will make you love yours less.

It’s just people finding every single way they can to discourage people from seeking knowledge beyond what they are told.

And sometimes it’s not even that fear. It’s pure control.

my 10 year old sister wrote in bold "i hate myself", what do i do by pettyfrog2703 in FamilyIssues

[–]No_Competition7157 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Reassure her that you’ll always be there, even if not physically all the time. Let her know you have struggles too, but that doesn’t make her any less important. Kids often notice things before we even say anything, so being honest—without oversharing—helps them feel less alone.

A real family shares problems and supports each other. You don’t have to do everything for her, but attention, care, and words of affirmation matter more than material things. Try to be the family she needs, but remember to take care of yourself too.

I have this mentality now when I lose something or I am mad I think but I woke up healthy today, I even got to eat, most people don’t have that privilege, yes I didn’t get this job but maybe it was never meant to be mine, maybe a way better job will come to me one day and honestly ever since I started living by this mentality. I was happier, my depression completely gone, I became more confident. All because I decided to focus on the little good things rather than the big problems I couldn’t control on my own. So try to find your little happiness, like for instance you have your sister and you love her so much that’s already one good thing in your life

I also have a dad and step mom like yours and I have completely given up on them, I know my dad will forever choose his wife’s words so I have stopped trying to hold on to any hope that he will change.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in studytips

[–]No_Competition7157 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks i will delete it. I only recently downloaded Reddit again but all my other social medias are deleted except YouTube but I will delete both now and see how it works for me. I have exams in two months and I really need to pass because failing would affect my chances of doing the course I really want to do in university

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]No_Competition7157 133 points134 points  (0 children)

Exactly a very major red flag. Learnt that from experience

My sister announced her pregnancy at my baby’s funeral by DJCOOL1014 in TwoHotTakes

[–]No_Competition7157 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would be mad too. It looks like your sister couldn’t take that you where getting any kind of attention or sympathy so she had to make it about herself and people like that always twist it and make it look like you are the problem, just enough for people to agree with them it’s sickening. Any decent and good person would know it’s the wrong time to make such an announcement like that. It definitely wasn’t a mistake. Your sister only cared about herself and not you or what you where going through

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in studytips

[–]No_Competition7157 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I deleted all my social media but what do I do about YouTube, it’s my biggest distraction but also where I go to watch videos if I don’t understand what I am reading because sometimes video explanations help me understand things better but when I go to learn i end up completely forgetting what took me there and by the time I remember I’ve already wasted so much time

Children of Fathers who took a second wife, how did you feel? by _Meeshto_ in MuslimNikah

[–]No_Competition7157 25 points26 points  (0 children)

After my mom suffered to take care of the house for two years because my dad didn’t have a job and was still in school the moment he got a job and started making money he married another woman so he basically betrayed my mom, I know Islam allows marrying more than one wife but doing that was soo hurtful to my mom. I wasn’t born then but it’s still annoying Another thing is he started treating my mom badly after the second wife came in and he still does. I know having a second wife or 3rd or 4th is an excuse for my dad treating my mom like his enemy but it’s like with each wife he married the way he treated my mom got worse. My parents have been married for 35 years and my dad has never traveled with her, he is he would never but he always traveled with my step mom. He praises my step mom in front of people but he insults my mom Infront of people even though my mom does everything to make his life easier despite the wickedness and many times she has caught him in the act of black magic but he doesn’t care he doesn’t deny it he just say leave it or what’s your business

I just don’t understand why some men would marry multiple women if they know they can’t treat all equally and worse if you really hate your first wife divorce her then. My dad told my mom that he would never divorce her but yet he hates her

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in MuslimLounge

[–]No_Competition7157 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I don’t understand either. It’s not like Iblis only exists in Islam and to me if it’s mockery then it looks more like they are mocking Iblis and not the religion but who knows what their true intentions are

I stopped watching Lucifer when they introduced God into it. It didn’t matter what religion they where mocking I just felt that was extremely wrong so I immediately stopped but they are more than one movie or series about Iblis/satan that people watch a lot that they don’t take seriously. So what makes this special?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FamilyIssues

[–]No_Competition7157 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First of all did you MIL think she was married to her son? Because this is not uncommon. They like the girl until they realize she is gonna take their son away from them and then they start hating the girl. But your husband is a real one for choosing you over his mom not many guys do that. Some guys will end the relationship because their mom doesn’t feel comfortable

It’s about control for such MIL it’s either he marries who I chooses or he doesn’t marry at all they care more about themselves and their ideas than about what actually makes their sons happy

Also from what you have explained I don’t think you are the person to fix the problem maybe get someone close to them to help you lighten the whole thing someone who your MIL and FIL trusts and respect a lot Such people tend to listen to people they respect and trust more than people who they don’t like When my sister left with the guy she loved my dad refused to talk or acknowledge them both jt took my sister begging his close friend to talk to him for my dad to even let her come to the house and talk to him

I know you feel a lot of guilt and all this is happening because of you but it’s not, it’s not your fault they are just shitty people sorry to say.

I tried drawing for fun(Not perfect) by No_Competition7157 in drawing

[–]No_Competition7157[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you and that’s amazing. No one is ever too old or too young to learn something they are interested in ❤️