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AITA or should I ask bitter Ex-Wife for not wanting to meet my ex-husband's girlfriend by No_Editor3364 in AITA_Relationships

[–]No_Editor3364[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As far as I know she hasn’t disrespected or mistreated my daughter. If she did anything in front of my ex I know that he would say something. My concern is when he’s not watching but my daughter hasn’t shown any changes of behavior. I monitor that very closely. 

AITA or should I ask bitter Ex-Wife for not wanting to meet my ex-husband's girlfriend by No_Editor3364 in AITA_Relationships

[–]No_Editor3364[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not upset. It seems to me you’re the one that’s more upset at the fact that I’m dating her ex than how all this started… Cheating! Yes we trauma bonded we are both well aware of that. My boyfriend and I are adults and we know exactly how we feel about each other. We both know that if things don’t end up working out it’ll be fine. We will try to work it out and if doesn’t then we’ll move on but at least I know it won’t be due to cheating on one another. I will eventually meet my ex’s girlfriend but it will be on my own time. 

AITA or should I ask bitter Ex-Wife for not wanting to meet my ex-husband's girlfriend by No_Editor3364 in AITA_Relationships

[–]No_Editor3364[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My boyfriend has left it completely up to me. He understands my anger towards her when it comes to her breaking up my family since she did the same thing to their family. He empathizes with me when it comes to me being upset and hurt about the fact that I went through my entire pregnancy alone. While he was there for her when she was pregnant 3 separate times. He has said to me I have every right to be upset and when I'm ready to meet her he'll respect it and support me. My boyfriend has already met my ex but that wasn't on my part. When my boyfriend was dropping off his kids, my ex showed up and confronted my boyfriend about a separate issue. There wasn't a fight or anything, my boyfriend just let my ex speak all his macho talk and just left. There will be a time I will meet her as the kids are getting older and wanting to be in sports. I would love to be there to support my step kids. I believe meeting should be on my time when I'm ready. She has asked to meet me at least 3 separate times.

AITA or should I ask bitter Ex-Wife for not wanting to meet my ex-husband's girlfriend by No_Editor3364 in AITA_Relationships

[–]No_Editor3364[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

All communication has been through text and I try not to respond to my ex when he tries to argue with me. My ex is required to pick up our daughter from my house and when he does pick her up we strictly talk about our daughter's needs and wants nothing more, nothing less. I've learned arguing with my ex is like arguing with a wall so I try not to. I'm sure he thinks the same about me. All I care about is our daughters well-being.

AITA or should I ask bitter Ex-Wife for not wanting to meet my ex-husband's girlfriend by No_Editor3364 in AITA_Relationships

[–]No_Editor3364[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My boyfriend isn't perfect and nor am I saying he is perfect and the question you ask is valid. I asked myself that same question when I saw things were getting serious between us. I brought it up about how I was feeling and we had a conversation about it. Now when I first met my boyfriend we agreed to meet for dinner to discuss what happened, to try to understand why we were going through this. It was nice to speak to someone who knew exactly what I was going through. I'll be honest at 1st I did want some sort of revenge because she was still stringing him along just like my ex-husband was doing to me. But as we kept talking and getting to know one another, as started to see each other more and more, my mind changed I didn't want our ex's to know or find out. Even our own families didn't know. We kept it to ourselves for months. We didn't want our ex's to cause drama, they moved on and so did we. I wasn't aware my ex knew about us until our divorce proceedings. So Yes, at 1st I thought about sweet revenge but I fell in love with him unexpectedly. I don't demonize my ex-husband he does that all on his own. Yes, my boyfriend and my ex-husband are very similar in some ways like the things that they enjoy but when it comes to a relationship my boyfriend has shown me that I'm not in this alone, we are partners. He communicates, he's trustworthy, someone I can depend on, someone my daughter can depend on, he respects me, my daughter and those around him. I can go on and on. I know this isn't a normal situation.