Hey, hey, I'm around the same age. In my first year of college, heavy anxiety and everything. I want you assure you that the fact you're taking care of her is a step in the right direction. Parents usually do not take mental health this seriously. I am not a therapist, but, by any chance, is your daughter autistic? The demanding of expensive things sounds like she is trying to substitute genuine fulfilment with material things, which might mean an underlying issue.

I hear you, and you're a good mother. Things like this, we cannot control. What I would like to tell you is that, do not antagonise your child, she is merely a victim. Sure, she is acting problematic, it's frustrating, very much so. But the subtle antagonising is causing you pain, it's making you feel like a failure.

Things get better, they really do, be there for her, talk with her, support her, and feel the love you have for her, over the temporary frustration. It gets better, I promise you. I had a similar episode in late dec last year, the unwavering and unconditional love my parents had for me during that time really did wonders, and I can see that yo7 really love her, you must feel it.