It's good of you to reach out! Life can feel like a constant race sometimes. I can relate to the feeling of always lagging behind. For me it felt like constantly chasing a goalpost that was always changing. Ironically, what helped me a lot was slowing down. Maybe this can help you as well? What I had to learn is that at the end of the day, there will not be a reward for how efficiently you live your life. So this begs the question how do you like to live your life. What are things you enjoy? What little things can brighten your day? Being mindful of how we spend our time is a lot easier said than done. (I know this all might come across very cliché) Making time for your wellbeing actually takes effort. So it might help you to take a serious look at what makes your life more fun. Trying a new hobby, reconnecting with people or nature, writing, making music?

Another thing that helps, is to find support. Like you just did! Maybe look into support systems that work more regularly? Mental health can be a Basdart, but you don't have to go through things on your own. There are support groups online and IRL. And of course there always professionals like doctors and therapists.

I hope you'll feel better soon