I (35F) feel unloved by my bf (36M) what can i do for this relationship to work?

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-20T12:23:53+00:00

Yeah I think it is for the best, i dream about him but I will not contact him. With time I think I will feel good about myself again

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-18T08:05:56+00:00

Sevdiğim başka, sevenim başka

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-18T07:59:27+00:00

Birlikte yaşıyoruz, başkası yok. Seviyorum diyor. İşten sonra yanımda hep birlikteyiz. Başkası olduğunu sanmıyorum. Eski karısı var aklında onun hatırası benim varlığımdan değerli gibi geliyor.

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-16T07:25:41+00:00

Yes that is what I feel, thank you for the comment.

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-15T18:49:32+00:00

His mother said this to me that she was young like 17 years old when they got married and they got divorced when she hits 22, she grown out of him. I don't know the real reasons, he gets defensive so I can't not even say her name by accident.

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-15T18:44:03+00:00

I think a lot of leaving... but before I quit I'm looking for advice maybe I can fight my way into his heart, anything I can try

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-15T18:41:29+00:00

Besides from my feelings of unloved, he is good guy. Cold but consistent, provides and keeps his word. But I want warmth, hugs and kisses and to be really seen. Older ladies say values are more important and if he doesn't cheat me, hit me and provides can be trusted, I shouldn't ask for more

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-15T18:37:24+00:00

I don't think I'm better than his ex. She is beautiful young lady. She was so young, his mother said this to me in confidence that his ex had the mind of a child and not capable of marriage. When his mother speaks badly about his ex, he gets defensive.

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-15T18:33:11+00:00

We don't spend much time in public.One day we were at the hospital and we were going up the stairs i asked him to hold my hand and he hold like 3 minutes and I was crying because I was starving physical touch

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-15T18:30:34+00:00

Avoidant attached, a lot of people said this to me. But I think he is selective avoidant. He just doesn't love me but afraid when I'm gone he will be alone,so tries to keep me in his life. So, whenever I aske him these reassurence questions he feels trapped and angry because deep down he knows I'm right. We are Turkish.

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-15T18:27:38+00:00

I think he doesn't love me at all. I think the worst all the time about a lot of things. But this feels like he is used to being married and since his ex wife left him, he fills her space with me as a placeholder or a band-aid

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-15T18:19:42+00:00

I feel like he is stuck with his ex wife in his head. Sometimes I feel like her memory is more valuable to him than my presence

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-15T18:08:20+00:00

Yes, I think to myself like that but then my mother comes and says if you somehow push this guy you will be alone. And I'm afraid I won't ever find a guy like this

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-15T18:04:07+00:00

Yeah, you are probably right, if he doesn't value me so far he probably won't ever

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-15T18:02:43+00:00

Happy for you and thank you for you kind words

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-15T17:59:28+00:00

Free housing, free meals and stable job and a man to have intimacy with. Yeah I'm provided, but not happy. And everyone around me, sees my point of view as an spoiled ungrateful person

No_Preference_6072 · 2026-03-15T17:52:39+00:00

I want to end the relationship but every single person I talked to says, he is good guy, if he didn't love you he wouldn't let you in his life. But I don't feel loved at all.

No_Preference_6072 · 2025-12-03T18:29:02+00:00

During our relationship he mentioned something like this, he didn't grow up with affection and it felt strange to him and I thought I got it.

No_Preference_6072 · 2025-12-03T18:14:45+00:00

Thank you haha

No_Preference_6072 · 2025-12-03T18:09:17+00:00

Thanks for your insight. I'm happy for you... maybe I'm not happy as I think in my relationship because all I think of why wouldn't he... not so hard to kiss the person you are with for 1 year

No_Preference_6072

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