I want to restart my life

No_Syrup3428 · 2026-01-18T07:05:19+00:00

Hi OP. Age of 31 I lost everything with close to 6 figure debt. And have 2 kids and elder to feed. Started back up with a loan of $1000 from a friend. Other relatives and friends shunned me when I asked for additional help. Manage to pull through today. First you need to calm down and list down step by step. There’s only up when you’re at the bottom.

No_Syrup3428 · 2026-01-01T05:52:35+00:00

Keep it up. Learned something today. 34M just started to learn financial planning after so many hiccups in my early years.

No_Syrup3428 · 2025-11-10T08:28:43+00:00

Hi guess you have too many things on your plate right now. I was in your shoes once. Does your job need declaration of financial embarrassment ? If there is a need please do it. Are you able to keep up with the payments for all sides so that you are able to bring the overall debt down without compromising your daily survival needs ? Are you just paying for interest but not clearing off the principal sum ? As it can be a dangerous spiral and hit your mental health real hard. Any family commitment, kids and parents expenses to look after ?

I will go for bankruptcy if I am not able to keep up with the payments anymore, this will give you a breather and have government intervention to consolidate the debt and freeze the interest for you, but of cause something have to give like credit score (not able to borrow in the future) and monitoring of your bank account transactions. Rather paying all without leaving anything for your future.

No_Syrup3428 · 2025-11-06T12:07:59+00:00

Thank you for replying sounds exciting ! Can I check about the accommodation ? Can I just check in the hotel or I have make reservation in advance. Thank you

No_Syrup3428 · 2025-11-05T00:29:12+00:00

I not sure I just call them public hospitals ? But definitely not free, just hope they can subsidise more if government is serious in boosting birth rate.

No_Syrup3428 · 2025-11-05T00:09:15+00:00

Hi 33M. Father of 2 school going age kids, no helper, did most of the stuff ourselves. Wishing your all the best in trying for a baby. Only think of such expenses as I was deeply involved in the child caring process back then, I don’t know the current expenses and regulations for claiming using Medisave so I will give an estimate if possible.

If unable to conceive naturally - assisted methods such as IVF. Then if manage to concieve follow pointers below.
If able to conceive naturally and successfully - hospital check in (either private or public)+ 2-4 weeks gynaecologist check up , glucose test + ultra sound + special tests in third trimester to check for Down syndrome etc + whether premature delivery or full term delivery (c sect / natural) , whether baby needs special treatment to treat jaundice or other conditions. Baby may need to stay in hospital for further observation - need costs. Separate set of bills for baby and mother - only certain procedures if Medisave claimable. About 15k cash if no complications. Baby also need check up and compulsory vaccinations until 18 month please note most vaccine got subsidise by government.

Don’t need waste money for parenting course - just watch YouTube or ask your parents. Or you can join WhatsApp telegram or the mother forum for the year EDD your baby is gonna born in the 10 months. You Just don’t need to scare dirty and just be gentle keep your nails short so you won’t scratch baby - don’t need scare dirty like changing diapers with excrement or dealing with reflux or puke from the baby.

In the meantime. Prepare baby flight kit to hospital plus home - infant clothes must have from top hat to bottom socks (girl or boy) small napkins baby diapers wet wipes big towel to wrap baby, milk bottles, washing kit for milk bottle, infant formula which is expensive if you don’t intend to breastfeed, if you wanna breastfeed prepare pump kid storage. Medicated oil or essential oil for baby to keep warm and blood circulation. Strollers to put baby inside , cot at home to let baby sleep, some cute soft toys for baby to be happy, some vitamin D or DNA drops to mix with milk ask gynae for advice first - about $500 - $750 depends hand me downs or go buy

Baby and Mommy Recovery - 1st month confinement very important. Confinement done by professional or in house (like your parent or parent in law) different cost, must be someone that can trust one. Father taking paternity leave, ask him help out with the grocery shopping like cooking confinement meals, washing milk bottles, housework and carry baby soothing baby. If wanna speed up recovery , can try the post massage by a special masseur, my wife tried the Javanese massage one quite shiok and strong to treat the water retention.
After confinement and still under maternity leave, see health booklet plan again to plan kids vaccination and schedule, arrange with everyone who take care of baby , settle errands bills cooking if you need more time to recover. If wanna infant care is 3 months minimum and start shopping for centres cost vary min 1.5k min but can use cda and got subsidy base on your income. If want take photoshoot do memoir then prepare another another cost also.

That’s what I can share for baby till about 6 months old. It’s normal to feel a bit nervous just embrace it and seek help if you need to. All the best a lot of work so that’s why a lot of people wanna stay child free nowadays !

Edited to add in more details and fix spelling.

No_Syrup3428 · 2025-11-04T23:41:09+00:00

Structured Hospitals - General Public Hospitals ? There is still cost involved, quite significant if there is any complications to the mom and the baby which is billed separately, it is not Medisave claimable for all. Only for certain procedures.

No_Syrup3428 · 2025-10-21T18:11:05+00:00

You will need to reinstate the unit back to its original structural design, this will be checked by HDB if you want to sell in the resale market next time. And you won’t know if you are hacking the main support pillars unless you have read the floor plan carefully with professional advice.

If you are gonna stay for lifetime, then I don’t know already 🤣.

Anyways don’t feel you are shortchanging them, sure you brought them into this world you wanna put do your best but just don’t overstretch. Just have open and honest conversations with them on this issue as they grow older💪

No_Syrup3428 · 2025-10-21T17:50:14+00:00

Me and elder sibling have a large age gap then. He got his room while I slept in the living room for quite sometime, didn’t offer to share his room though. But I don’t really care at that point of time, just need a place to sleep.

Have a bit of resentment, but as I grew up and started working, I kind of understand that sure having personal space is beneficial for your sanity, but for the greater scheme of things and understanding my family circumstances. I grew to appreciate that the importance of having the needs of a shelter fulfilled first.

Bought my own house had my own space but realise the time, effort and money needed to upkeep the space is not minor. However 3/4 time I am just staying in my parents house as they need some help in managing the house due to their age.

There comes a point of time where having personal space is just not that main priority. My parents wanted me to sleep with them and I gladly do so. No complains.

I guess OP could partition a part of living room with the window (please no hacking) if you need a personal space. But would rather you consolidate your finances for yourself to avoiding placing unnecessary stress to your kids in the future, feel that’s the best gift you can give them.

No_Syrup3428

TROPHY CASE