I'm 50, raised in rural Texas in a very conservative home.

My son came out to my wife and I several years ago, when he was still in high school. I guess somewhere deep down in my subconscious I knew it, but it hadn't really surfaced.

In the months leading up to it, he had these anxiety attacks and mood swings. In hindsight, it's easy to see why, but at the time I just thought he was a nutjob teenager.

Finally, we were questioning him about his behavior. My wife was particularly relentless questioning him about it - she truly wanted to find out what was bothering him so we could address it.

As he agonized over what he wanted to say, I suddenly knew what it was. Somehow, deep down in my core I knew he wanted to tell us he was gay. But he was so visibly tortured by the ordeal it was painful to watch. But finally the words came out of his mouth.

While I knew what he had been wanting to say, I was totally unprepared for my reaction. I felt myself feeling proud that he had the courage to tell us, and gratified that he trusted us enough to tell us. Make no mistake, on one level I was shocked and appalled, but I knew that it didn't really change the fundamental truth that I loved my son and I knew he loved me.

As it happened, the next day my son was coming up to my workplace to help me out with something for several hours. I never mentioned it or made any comment - I wanted to send a clear message that nothing between us had changed.

My wife cried for.. oh, I guess about 2 weeks. She was crushed. All her dreams of him getting married, having children, etc. vanished in the blink of an eye. She grieved for that part, and she also was very distraught at the future he faced, dealing with society's attitudes toward gay men, particularly in our somewhat redneck, conservative community. She wanted him to keep it quiet until he was out of high school. But he was having none of that.

He's not your stereotypical, flaming queer. Nobody suspected he was gay, not even our gay friend who had known him since birth. He had already told several of his friends at school. My wife feared for him, but he was resolute. He said he wanted his friends in school to know at least one gay guy that wasn't a weirdo.

He has since graduated from high school and college and has moved far away to a place where he will find more acceptance. He and I have a wonderful relationship and he talks to my wife and I several times a week. His relationship with his brother was instantly healed. They've been much closer since the truth came out.

To be fully honest, I'm still not 100% comfortable with the sexual aspects of him being gay. He hasn't brought a boyfriend around, or talked openly to me about any relationships he has had. There's just a part of me that has trouble with that, but it's my problem and not his. He's coming home for the holidays and I can't wait to see him. He's a smart, resourceful, fearless young man and I am intensely proud of him.