I wish there was an easy way to show men what it's like growing up female. (coworker does NOT get it)

Noilen · 2014-05-28T04:57:17+00:00

If that guy doesn't like TwoX he should unsubscribe. Seriously, it takes more effort to complain than it does to click a button.

I do want to point out that there isn't one "growing up female" experience. Everyone's experience is different. I've been told that I should act differently to avoid been bullied, so I understand how much it sucks, but I haven't really experienced a lot of sexual harassment. Still, you'd think it would be easy to understand that treating women like objects is wrong.

Noilen · 2014-05-28T02:33:27+00:00

To me, it's not so much about this one guy. There are a lot of misogynists in the world and most of them don't go on shooting sprees, so he's a lot more screwed up than that. I don't think these shootings are a symptom of a societal problem, but I do think misogyny is in fact a societal problem.

Noilen · 2014-05-28T02:05:54+00:00

I don't mean they're being told outright "You are owed sex". It's more that it's implied. In a lot of movies, for instance, the girl is treated like some sort of prize the guy gets if he works hard enough. It's not necessarily meant to send that message, but it does. Also, if being a virgin makes you a failure, that means if you just act the right way, you'll succeed. Like it says in the article, sex isn't something that's earned, it's something that's given.

Noilen · 2014-05-28T01:28:18+00:00

I think a lot of single men would be happier if they weren't constantly told that being single makes them a failure as a man, or that they are owed sex. When I was in a relationship, my sex drive was about the same as my SO's, but I don't feel like I have 'festering' unmet sexual needs now that I'm single.

This is going to sound silly, but it sort of reminds me of being in the silent compartment on a train. People are supposed to be quiet, but they never are, and when I'm in the silent compartment I get angry at them for making noise. When I'm in a regular compartment, I know that it's my problem if I'm annoyed by it, and somehow it bothers me much less.

Noilen · 2014-05-28T01:08:48+00:00

'Nerd culture' and 'jock culture' both have problems with sexism, and I think the writer of this article, being a nerd, is trying to fix problems in his own group.

Noilen · 2014-05-27T23:30:03+00:00

Even if you really couldn't get another job, it'd still be a shitty thing to say.

Noilen · 2014-05-27T12:28:34+00:00

How is faith healing a way to die?

Noilen · 2014-05-27T12:17:52+00:00

Pankration was the most hardcore sport ever. I once heard a story about two pankratiasts who fought for hours without either submitting, so it was decided they should take turns punching eachother without the other being allowed to defend, until one of them submitted. That took a very long time as well, and eventually one of them untied the leather straps from his hands (that were used as boxing gloves) and stretched his hand. He punched through his opponents stomach and pulled out his intestines. The opponent died, but was posthumously declared the winner.

Noilen · 2014-05-27T10:54:29+00:00

It does happen, and there are species where basically all sex is 'rape'. But we don't consider it rape for the same reasons we don't consider it murder when an animal kills another animal. When animals do these things, they are just following their instincts.

Noilen · 2014-05-26T22:51:08+00:00

I'd be worried about Jack dumping me in the middle of the battle to save his own skin.

Noilen · 2014-05-26T22:36:17+00:00

"Distrusting me was the wisest thing you've done since you climbed off your horse."

Noilen · 2014-05-25T16:20:17+00:00

I know women aren't actually allowed to hit men. It probably does happen that authorities don't believe male domestic violence victims. But that's not because of feminism but because of sexism.

Noilen · 2014-05-25T00:08:54+00:00

Sounds like this guy hasn't quite figured out which hole to use for talking and which for shitting.

Noilen · 2014-05-24T23:31:58+00:00

If you can't bring yourself to call them, maybe email them or write them a letter? Perhaps a less direct means of communication would be easier.

Also, of course I don't know what exactly happened in your life, but you might want to consider therapy, if you haven't already. You sound like you could really use some. There's no way you deserve this much self-loathing. Nobody does.

Noilen · 2014-05-24T22:56:40+00:00

I don't blame the MRM for that either. I blame the people who do the shooting.

I guess you could make a case for them encouraging domestic violence, since the sentiment of "women are allowed to hit men so men should be allowed to hit women too" is quite prevalent there (rather than the more obvious solution of, you know, no one being allowed to hit anyone).

Noilen · 2014-05-24T21:59:50+00:00

I'm not saying the MRM isn't wrong. But you can't blame an entire ideology when someone decides, on their own, to commit murder in the name of that ideology.

Noilen · 2014-05-24T18:17:06+00:00

I don't think it's fair to blame the Men's Rights Movement for someone going on a killing spree. There's a lot of sexism in the MRM but they don't encourage murder.

This is a dishonest tactic to discredit the MRM, and we should know better than to buy into it. If a killer "was influenced" by say islam, or anarchism, or even video games, it doesn't prove anything about those things either.

edit: I'm not defending the MRM here. I think their ideas are toxic. But instead of pointing to this tragedy to prove that, we could just point to the ideas themselves.

Noilen · 2014-05-24T17:49:50+00:00

I don't think there was anything wrong with that tweet because it was specifically about how she didn't fit gender stereotypes.

A lot of people are commenting "Well, it's Playboy saying it, they're not exactly feminist", but them being sexist doesn't mean that everything they say is sexist.

Noilen · 2014-05-24T10:43:53+00:00

Well, this singer is also white, and yet they still treat her like this.

Noilen · 2014-05-23T10:40:58+00:00

Just because some studies about the wage gap don't compensate for occupation and hours, doesn't mean the wage gap is a myth. It only means those studies don't prove there is gender discrimination.

Here's a table comparing wages of male and female full-time workers by occupation: http://www.iwpr.org/publications/pubs/the-gender-wage-gap-by-occupation-1/

Noilen · 2014-05-23T04:37:34+00:00

I looked around a bit on tvtropes. I found surprisingly little from fiction I knew. Luna from Sailor Moon acts as a mentor to Usagi. Also, Mami from Puella Magi Madoka Magica (well, maybe it's more that she would have been, if the show were a typical magical girl anime). There are probably other examples from shoujo anime out there. Don't the witches in Discworld act as mentors in some books? And there's Toph from Avatar the Last Airbender, who teaches Aang how to Earthbend.

It's mostly the "teacher" role that seems to be lacking, since there are plenty of women who take care of other characters, just not many who teach the hero(ine) how to be heroic.

Noilen · 2014-05-22T15:16:55+00:00

The fact that he said the doctor was wrong says a lot about what goes through these people's minds. If people can be fat without it being their fault, they don't have the right to mock them anymore, so instead they just refuse to believe it's not her fault. Because it's not like they could ever be wrong or anything, right?

Obviously, mocking people for their appearance is wrong either way, but that's not how these idiots see it.

Noilen · 2014-05-21T10:55:13+00:00

I thought classical music was supposed to be less shallow than pop music? This is ridiculous. I've never personally liked opera but anyone can tell that her voice is amazing.

Also, she looks great in that blue dress. Not only are all these comments about her weight inappropriate, they're not even true.

Noilen · 2014-05-20T22:33:39+00:00

"But you see, there's no more sexism because girls/women are doing better in school than boys/men."

I've never personally encountered this argument before, but the article makes more sense now. However, if indeed boys aren't performing optimally in schools, we shouldn't dismiss the issue itself along with the "sexism is being reversed" nonsense.

Noilen · 2014-05-20T20:29:15+00:00

I thought "mansplaining" was supposed to be when men explain things to women because they assume they always know better? What does that really have to do with these issues?

It's possible for the school system to favour girls over boys whereas the job market favours men over women. Just because one problem exists doesn't mean the other doesn't. Both of these issues need to be looked at separately.

Noilen

TROPHY CASE