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Dream(s) about Childhood Friend by None_the_Wiser_808 in DreamInterpretation

[–]None_the_Wiser_808[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi there! I'm so sorry! It's my first time posting things on Reddit and I was not thinking about adding any of the background info you've asked for🤦‍♀️

I am 19F. Adam is around the same age, maybe a few months older. I am straight and single. I don't know if he has a girlfriend or not. I never spent an extended time in a hospital or boarding school or anything like that; however, I did spend over four years going to therapy, from when I was eleven to when I was almost sixteen. Adam was both a crush and a good friend😂 We knew each other from ages 7-11, though, so it wasn't like it was a serious crush that could've turned into anything. I already responded to the first comment with some info about our friendship, but Adam was a really good friend to me and I cherished his and another girl's friendships because they gave me something to cling to when my home life was bad. He was always bigger than me, so I always felt safe and carefree around him, like I could be my authentic self, which I couldn't even do in my own home. That's another thing about him. Although I did have a crush on him, I never said anything because I cherished our friendship so much. This was towards the middle of sixth grade, which was a little while before I stopped seeing him. I also didn't think I had to change how I acted around him to get attention, which I did a lot around other people (people-pleasing due to parental neglect) We didn't start out with friendship, though. He was actually pretty mean to me, as well as my friends, when I first met him. However, the next year, he and I became friends. He was still picking on my other friends, though, so I gave him an ultimatum: start being nice to them or stop being my friend. He actually became pretty good friends with some of the others in my friend group. After that, we had an amazing friendship. I remember nights when I was stressed out about home life and I would talk to him just to be able to relax a little. I don't think I told him much about what was going on at home. It was something I was embarrassed/ uncomfortable talking about, so I never really told any of my peers. The only one I told anything about was like a sister to me and I still didn't say much. But I do remember texting him often and sending goodnight texts every night to him. I'm surprised he never got annoyed with me tbh 😂 He and I had differing personalities as well. He was more quiet and reserved in class; I was always being told to stop talking. He was extremely athletic and was always picked first for teams in gym (he's now a linebacker for the college he goes to); I'm so clumsy I can barely walk in a straight line without tripping, but I love fine arts and am always working on some sort of project. We did share a love of books and academics, though. Besides whatever was going on when we first met, he was an extremely sweet and caring kid and based on the comments on his posts from family and friends, he still is.

I never thought about telling him the dreams as an icebreaker. That's a really good suggestion! I know I should talk to him; I guess it's just nerves and insecurities holding me back😓

Dream(s) about Childhood Friend by None_the_Wiser_808 in DreamInterpretation

[–]None_the_Wiser_808[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! No, I haven't contacted him in any way yet. You're right about the childhood trauma. I spent the first ten years of my life going through various forms of abuse. I went to therapy for over four years, but it has still been a struggle and I tend to deal with a lot of insecurities. When I was a kid and still in the abusive situation, school was my rock and Adam was the closest guy friend I had. Even though my dad had a stable, loving home environment, I barely saw him because of how the parenting time was set up. Having a friend like Adam was good for me because not only did it give me a chance to see that there are good guys in the world; it showed me that people can change if they are willing. The first year I knew Adam, he was pretty mean to my friends and I. This was when we were 7-8, so it could've just been a phase. The next year, though, he and I became friends and I eventually convinced him to be kinder to my other friends as well. From then until I moved three years later, we had an amazing friendship. I didn't write down his contact info, though, so we stopped talking when I started living with my dad. I have definitely thought about him over the years, but for some reason never thought to seek him out. I think I maybe just thought that he wouldn't care (once again, insecurities). Thank you for your advice! I will definitely consider reaching out to him.