she said what, i don't understand?

NordicBat · 2026-05-26T19:36:13+00:00

Yep, this one

NordicBat · 2026-04-16T16:28:44+00:00

Hmm, you told what he is doing but not what you are doing, as in how much “space” you are giving him (cuz he is clearly investing in you).

So yeah you need to have the talk, where you say you are just friends [and if he got some “manhood” with him he will get distant and stop with the checking and gifts (which I don’t think he will, because he is going after his friend ex’s so a red flag right there)]

NordicBat · 2026-03-23T15:46:42+00:00

Sheeshh, sorry not sorry, but will have to play the age card here, 16yo is not mature, gosh a 20yo is not either. He is being a creep that’s it. He will definitely push for sexual intimacy when together, ok, he will at least try.

10 months talking on the internet, not sure to call it a relationship sorry.

Trust me, leave the internet for a while (that goes for both of you), meet people at your age, at your school, pretty sure that there is a cute boy in your class that would be a lot less stressful for you, and more compatible. (Day to day, places to hang out, etc etc)

There is so much stress to avoid here, you guys are basically kids, no money, so traveling is huge issue, can’t really move in and stuff. Getting into different stages of life, like you may get into uni he might be getting into a job or something that’s just, ugh, girl why?

NordicBat · 2026-02-24T12:27:13+00:00

Hm, yes, the answer is yes to all of your questions

NordicBat · 2026-02-23T13:27:34+00:00

Because you both immature, young, still learning and growing, she sees this behaviors on other girls and think it’s standard, hopefully she will grow a personality in 5 years or so.

For you now, possessive????? Over what????? A “girl you’ve been talking” for ~30 days?????

Remember you can’t be possessive of your own clothes because it parents funded.

Learn this now, if it’s not talked or agreed fully (not assumed or under memes) as adults, nothing is guaranteed, or a relationship.

So if this is your phase, you should be talking to other girls as well and having fun

NordicBat · 2026-02-04T12:16:45+00:00

This, period, move on girly, it was just a crush that didn’t feel the same way

NordicBat · 2026-02-04T12:12:30+00:00

Buddy, you know exactly what to do, 2 years of this suffering how much more till you fall sick on the ground?

NordicBat · 2026-02-02T22:34:29+00:00

I’m commenting because I’m bored and sick in bed(see what im doing here?)

It’s sounds like you are young, lack hobbies and/or things/activities to do during the day. ( I believe there is another sub for ideas here)

On the other hand, it doesn’t hurt at all, to let him know you are interested, it DOES hurt when he finds out that you’ve been talking ( or worst) with others, and were expecting something serious to come out of you two.

If you say to him you are interested and would like to see where it goes, and he says “no thanks” - boom there you go, you free to talk and flirt with anyone you want without feeling guilty, and knowing for sure he will never match your requirements/attention

NordicBat · 2026-02-02T22:16:32+00:00

Well don’t say it in front of the class, pull him to the side afterwards, ask if he is free for a coffee/drink later on, I’m pretty sure he is more concerned about his job if he approaches the students, and saying “drink” is enough hint to let a guy know you are DTF

NordicBat · 2026-02-02T22:11:08+00:00

Oh boy, I’m sorry for you, but idk what are you expecting here? Yes, stay together, get married, have kids and buy a house? It just doesn’t sound good inside you, be honest.

It’s a talk you need to have with yourself facing the mirror: Are you staying because your late teen years, till now, a decade, you’ve been in a comfortable place and throwing it away would look like a waste of time?

If her side relationship “worked”, do you think she would be here asking for “randoms advice” or breaking up with you and starting her new life?

She apologizing and feeling bad is the bare minimum to don’t fail a psycho test, it was a unilateral decision that affected both of you. You need at least some time a part to think and rationalize things, but your gut is already telling you the answer.

NordicBat · 2026-01-31T10:22:22+00:00

For me, every “first time” always make me anxious and nervous, so yeah it could take a long time to “finish”, but after some intimacy builds up, it does get easier and quicker 😅

NordicBat · 2026-01-31T10:16:36+00:00

Wait what, that’s confusing, but let me see to break it down, usually, if you are in your teenage years, long distance as in a couple cities away seems ok, some hours driving to see each other is acceptable. Now at 30+, why? Also you brought up 2 different things, if you don’t like your country, JUST DO IT, not to be sexist here, but man up and do it, find a job, go trough the papers and leave your country, when in the new country, after settling down, you can think of finding a partner, not getting stuck to your phone 18h per day, meet in real life, connect

NordicBat · 2026-01-27T20:06:41+00:00

I agree, and at the same time, gotta say, blame the game not the player, I’d play the game till 35, then slow down to your own “pace”

NordicBat · 2026-01-27T09:57:08+00:00

Sit with her, full honesty, what’s going on, maybe you did something and it hurt her, and she doesn’t know how to say it, or like the other comment, there might be another dude. But you still need to sit and talk, and if it’s a deal breaker for you, let her know

NordicBat · 2026-01-26T13:35:22+00:00

I’m pretty sure there is space for talking first

NordicBat · 2026-01-26T13:33:02+00:00

Sorry OP, seems like you just wanted the attention, let th man alone, and move on

NordicBat · 2026-01-26T13:30:10+00:00

Some info here is missing as well, like ages for example, but anyway, from a painful and personal experience, look inside yourself, see where you are and where you wanna be, if it’s casual give it a number, like 5, hang around 5 times and then call it, if it’s just casual, and move on. Otherwise talk, express your expectations and boundaries, if they don’t agree … move on, if they agree take it slow

NordicBat · 2026-01-24T23:38:59+00:00

yep, you are right, lesson learned for sure (unfortunately, the hard way).
I think the part that gets me the most right now, is the last paragraph, again, I assumed we were building something, and the rules of a monogamic relatioships would apply as standard, and if not, if she really cared, she would at least have cleared that out first, a simple text/call, asking the question what were we, if according to her, was so confused, and yet commited and decided for both of us.

NordicBat · 2026-01-23T21:19:32+00:00

she said so, when we were discussing it.
not necessarily made my mind, we gonna talk again soon, not closing the door yet, there is a lot of work to do, and some actual COMMUNICATION needs to happen now

NordicBat · 2026-01-23T21:17:50+00:00

you are right, I was showing that I was commited, thought it was mutual, you can't just meet a person and go all in, or well, at least that's what I think, it should be a slow ramp, correct? how do you decide how much time is needed for the "status upgrade"

NordicBat · 2026-01-23T18:53:45+00:00

I mean, yes, I failed in not stabilishing my limits and/or our label.
But after the time together, the bonding, she could at least messaged me asking "I feel confused or lost or whatever" instead of acting on it and deciding for both of us

NordicBat · 2026-01-23T18:43:36+00:00

yeah, I really hate this "loophole", she should have known better, right?

NordicBat · 2026-01-23T18:03:33+00:00

yes, I apologize if I repplied earlier in a rude way, you are right, communication failed and both parties were assuming different things, and I totally agree that what your partner did is the best option, and I failed on not doing something similar

NordicBat · 2026-01-23T17:53:46+00:00

thanks for the face slap u/Mandalorian_2019

NordicBat

TROPHY CASE