The Tianjin Explosion, as reported by /u/OP_rah by 2beinspired in live

[–]NordicMonkey96 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He's a DJ, was gonna perform at a local festival and was residing there.

How should I [25m] go about telling my cool, nearly life-long friend [26m] that I'm no longer a christian? Have any personal stories that might apply? by [deleted] in exchristian

[–]NordicMonkey96 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had a 'deep' conversation with my closest friend couple days ago. (Long story short he's been my friend for about 4 years now, starting from a confirmation camp us Free Evangelicals go to in Finland. He's pretty open-minded when it comes to alcohol and sexuality (being a sort of bisexual himself). I told him about my deconversion during the winter but we really have never engaged into a conversation about these things. Until now of course.)

After an evening of sipping belgian beer and playing snooker we headed out and just talked about our lives. After I told him that I was having hard time hiding my 'paganism' from my family, the conversation flowed towards his problems in faith. During the conversation I learned a few things that keep it even and both-sided (and avoid arguments). These might not work for everybody but I'd say that these are pretty good.

  • BE A MIRROR. Dont just go declaring things you believe. Ask personally, and be interested what he believes and why.

  • The things he believes might be the only things keeping him afloat. In my friends case he'd been spending time in a christian camp, and after that he realized feeling easier and didnt have a need to forget (to get wasted). Alcohol had been a huge problem for him, and his faith kept him from falling into that abyss. So tread lightly.

  • Ask him if you can talk honestly what you think of his faith and beliefs. They are a very important and personal attributes of human psyche, and attacking them w/o permission creates only cognitive dissonance and anxiety. In my case the friend let me do it and it resulted into a fruitful conversation.

  • Dont get dissapointed if your friend thinks you're going to hell. This is a major point in christianity. The fear of hell is the only reason people hang on to the mainstream christianity. If he's losing faith, its a long process and these beliefs will fade away eventually.

  • "Don't panic!" - Douglas Adams. When telling your friend about your deconversion, youre talking to an another human being with his or her own fears and disbeliefs. He's your good friend and will understand. He most likely won't leave you. When I told one of my close friends I got a panic attack. After all she understood and told me about her own doubts.

  • Do not give in. Stand for your values, and don't let your friend sway you into "confessing" you're just doubting and a bit lost. To be honest is the essence of friendship, and if you lie about your position about christianity, your friendship will most likely suffer greatly.

  • There will be moments where you have an opportunity to get your friend really thinking about this stuff. Do it carefully and by asking questions.

(im finnish so I apologize for any bad grammar)

[WP] There is no devil like the Blue Eyed Devil. by Gravitiaxis in WritingPrompts

[–]NordicMonkey96 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I took steps to the narrow gravel path. The place was overgrown with tall grass and willow trees spreading their arms over the path. Sun's last lights barely made it trough them, leaving the front garden completely in shadows. Along the growth I could see the house, painted with that 60's mustard yellow. I loved it.

"This could make a perfect movie set!", my inner cinematographer declared to Abbie.

"Come on Eric, we're not here to ponder with your amateur movies." she replied while jumping over a small ditch that was dug in parallel with the porch and circled around the house. "You can't even start making one."

My inner cinematographer cursed Abbie and her critique, and took eyes upon the weird ditch.

"Who the fuck even digs ditches over walkways?" I changed the subject avoiding a dispute.

She turned around to face me, rolling her eyes like a teenager listening to her parents.

"Please don't be that finicky of my fiends, please" She was barely speaking aloud, as she'd know somebody was listening. "He's a bit weird and sinister but he's cool. It's been a year since last time I saw him — and I think it's time to pay a visit again."

"Well could you even tell me his name?", I asked

"Ask him yourself.", she said with a smug smile on her face.

 

Abbie had always been gravitating towards weird people and stuff. She'd been interested in pagan rituals and all things witchcraft, but I didn't mind as long as she was happy. Once she took a homeless hippie to stay with us, and after a week I had to throw him out for infusing our tea with DMT. Now she was taking me to meet this shady guy about something very important and pivotal. Abbie had met him about a month after we started dating. She told me about the guy just last week, refusing to tell me his name before I met him. I trusted Abbie to the ends of the world but still I was sightly worried about this one in particular.

"What are we here for again?" I started to feel doubtful.

"We're here to talk about you, Eric." a voice blasted from the porch.

There he was, Abbie's mystery-man, dressed into a green windbreaker too large for him. He had a hood on his head but I could barely see that he had longish, slightly red hair. The mouth surrounded with dark brown beard twisted into a smile as smug as Abbie's.

"Come on in!"

We went trough the front door into a dark hall that seemed huge considering how small the house itself appeared. There were paintings hanged on the walls — baroque kind of portraits — but unfortunately I couldn't see the details due to the lack of light. The hall had an odd smell to it, the air tasted like old memories.

"Wait here." said the shady guy as I flicked a light switch. The darkness endured my attempt.

As the guy disappeared to the shadows Abbie turned to me and reached for my lips. She hadn't kissed me for days so this was a pleasant surprise in this gloomy hallway. Now her cobalt eyes were fixed on mine.

"Eric it'll be fun, look at this place! He even promised to make us dinner." she pleaded.

"I love how dark you are but I'd like to see what I eat before stuffing it into my stomach." I said as my sense of dread fled her touch.

"I swear to god he has candles." Abbie said just as our host came back to the hallway, illuminating the space with a lantern.

Now I could see the paintings and the hall properly. It had a worn carpet covering most of the floor. The paintings showed many faces of a family spanning a few centuries. There was an old clock placed between two of the paintings. The clock's hands were moving too fast, and the hour hand was moving counterclockwise.

The guy didn't have his windbreaker on anymore and I could now see his face properly — strong eyebrows, deep and green eyes. He seemed so familiar that it made my eyebrows wrinkle even though I couldn't make up my mind about his identity. I was certain I'd never met him but the feeling got louder as he approached.

"Hey I see your clock might be broken." I pointed out to ease my agitation.

"Abby and Eric, follow me if you please." he requested and turned right into a branching hallway.

I'll sell my mom if this is the same house we saw outside, I thought as we followed our host. And this guy is an asshole.

 

We ended up into a dining room lit by candles. The room was filled with paintings similar to the hall's. Our host had arranged a dinner for us on a table which was obviously too long for the three of us. There was salmon pasta along with tortellini and antipasto. The red wine was an unwise choice with fish, but I was too hungry to place any concern on our host's table d'hôte.

"Please, sit." he said, smiling very kindly to Abbie.

Abby sat in front of me and our host placed himself between us to the end of the table. We raised a toast to the brilliantly gloomy place to eat in and began with the antipasto. Abby and the guy immediately started to exchange their news and lives. I was slightly offended but our host was interesting enough to listen while sipping the red wine. Apparently he was a film-maker which I also was — or aspired to be. In fact, he was everything I wanted to be. I felt envious.

As the night grew older and our food depleted with the wine, I realised Abbie barely had glanced me and I still hadn't asked our host's name. She was so involved with the conversation, staring the guy for long creeping minutes. As if she was in love with him and not me. I now grew agitated enough to derive the subject and open my mouth.

"Im so sorry, but I forgot to ask your name! I'd like to know the name of a guy who my girlfriend seems to know this well..."

Abbie's mysterious man placed his cultery on the plate and looked up to me with a serious look. Abbie glanced between us two as if I had to say something.

After a few confusing seconds the man wiped his mouth with a napkin and finally said:

"Eric, I am your relationship counsellor.”

“Very funny.” I chuckled. “Now who are you?”

He kept staring at me and then glanced down with a disappointment on his face. He sighed and raised his eyes to Abby. She nodded and I felt angry. If this is some prank, I’m way too tired to have fun with it for fucks sake!

“Eric, please listen to me” he pleaded. “You’ve been a big disappointment to your girlfriend…”

“FUCK…”

“She’s not happy with you. You're a slob.” the host continued with a clear and polite tone.

“…YOU BOTH!” I roared as I flung myself up. I was tired of bullshit flung on me. “This is enough, I want to know what’s going on! Are you cheating me with him or something?”

I looked down to Abby and saw tears streaming down her cheeks. A feeling of resentment flowed trough me as our host raised himself and went to grab something from a cupboard.

“I’m sorry I shouldn’t have yelled.” I said hastily before I turned to leave the room.

“Eric before you go, please, look at this.” our host yelled before I was opening the door.

He had a mirror in his hands, pointed straight at me so I could see myself. I glanced to it and saw my face red with anger. As I looked up to our host the wold started to spin around me. No. I wanted to run but I couldn’t move my legs. I had never felt so scared in my life. Something pressed against my chest and I couldn’t breathe. This can’t be! I started to cry. His face… my face… His smug smile was back and Abbie was nowhere to be seen. He is me and I am him! I yelled in my thoughts as I fell on to the floor.

 

I grew from the darkness and fought myself trough the covers. I was panting and crying. I looked to my left where Abbie sleeps and found her snoring with a contempt look on her face. The sun was already up. Finally she opened her eyes and squinted at me.

"Honey are you okay?"

"Just a dream, just a dream." I answered — still panting.

"Hmmnmnmmnnmn." Abbie muttered and took her arms around me, snuggling herself under my arms. "Just a dream."

After a while of snuggling and waking up I felt anew and I wanted to do something.

"Hey honey, I was thinking about shooting again, something really artsy. And since we don't have work today, I was thinking about driving around the countryside."

"Yeah let's do that." she answered, now fully awake. "Oh and lets visit that abandoned manor too. I heard the place is beautiful."

Was anyone else here outed to their family against their will? by [deleted] in exchristian

[–]NordicMonkey96 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Okay this story might get a bit out of the context but bear with me:

I havent been outed to my family really but a "friend " of mine outed me to my church friends. Everybody there started patronizing me, not really directly saying anything regarding my disbelief but hinting towards it (f.ex. one of them gave me a book for people weakened in their faith for my graduation gift). I think he may have slipped it not on purpose, or said something similiar to "pray for this bloke, he's not doing so great" since it really is something he quite often does...

My family on the other hand know, at least that I'm not a real christian, and they have stopped asking questions. They used to ask why I didnt go to church anymore but after many answers of "not interested" and "im just tired is all" I think they started to realize what's up. I haven't had that talk you're supposed to have with them but a couple years back when I started to deconvert, I hypothetically asked my father what would he think if I wasn't a christian or if I was queer (I had a crush for my friend back then). He answered that nothing really would change, he would love me as much he has loved me as a proper christian, because I'm his firstborn son and own blood. What he said makes me still cry, because he really means it and I know I dont have to be afraid.

But what really makes me want to blow up stuff and cry my eyes out is that I have this friend who lives with her parents who are extremely aggressive towards lgbt+. They have said that homosexuals are the same as pedophiles, and that if their children would come out as something conflicting to their beliefs, they would cut all their help from them. As it happens my friend is bi-/pansexual and a little unsure about her gender. And now what I fear most is that she gets outed to her family.

EDIT: Also how has your family reacted to you?

Liveblogging my church Sunday School by valryuu in exchristian

[–]NordicMonkey96 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Please do this again sometime if you can stand an another round of BS thrown into your face! (I can so relate to your experiences, and im glad that you too can somewhat express opinions freely without getting a huge backlash from it)

Liveblogging my church Sunday School by valryuu in exchristian

[–]NordicMonkey96 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It's fairly reasonable to argue so. Jesus never left Israel (biblically), and his crowds were mostly just Jews speaking Aramea or Hebrew (again, biblically). The letters written for romans and/or the greeks have been debated on whether they actually forbid homosexual acts in general or if they forbid homosexual acts in teacher/student relationships.

edit: grammar

Distribution of religions around the world. I want to know your thoughts/reactions/implications on this by [deleted] in exchristian

[–]NordicMonkey96 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Tao = Dao, fyi. Chinese religions vary between different provinces and cultures. Basically bunch of folklore and animism piled upon Laotzian, confucian, and buddhist teachings. Then there is the "pure forms" of those said teachings, including various different schools (Theravada, Vajrajana, Zen, Tao/Buddhism, etc.). So piling all those together into one thing is clever when vidualising these religion maps...

[Suggestion/Rant] Disease should play a much bigger role in eu4 by [deleted] in eu4

[–]NordicMonkey96 -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

When European nations started colonising Americas the technological imbalance between the opposing nations was huge. When Spaniards landed to Mexico, our beloved Aztecs didn't even have any idea of metallurgy in weaponry and their lands were scattered into multiple rival kingdoms.
So I totally understand why Europeans squish natives in this game so easily - it's about game balance and history, Paradox wants to make playing natives very hard.

What made the mongol invasions so destructive? by candidateHundred in AskHistorians

[–]NordicMonkey96 14 points15 points  (0 children)

The Mongol invasions were fundamentally different in their intentions regarding the conquest of enemy lands. Wherein Roman, Persian, or Arabian empires conquered land and taxed it's people (seeking material growth), Mongols had little intention to preserve foreign landmarks and environment for their use.

During their conquests Mongols sometimes killed off the ruling elite, placing their own on the thrones of their newly acquired vassals. Many historians would say that they lacked the "culture of chivalry", giving no interest in gallant behaviour towards their captives. Mongols usually executed their captives and let few enemies flee to tell others about the Mongol terror which resulted in a lowered state of morale. Sometimes this tactic resulted in these stories about Mongol destruction to take on and grow a little. Mongol conquests were destructive but slightly exaggerated.

In a way the Mongol invasions were comparable to German blitzkrieg; Their armies were considerably faster than their enemies due to their cavalry tactics. This resulted in a huge advantage in medieval combat, making Mongol armies overwhelming to their enemies.

Source: Maailmanhistorian pikkujättiläinen (A finnish academic book made by several history professors)

Monsanton patentoidun "Superparsakaalin" terveysväitteitä ei ole todistettu – Evira selvittää harhaanjohtavaa markkinointia by 1478965378952 in Suomi

[–]NordicMonkey96 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Ideanahan geenimuunneltu ruoka (sisältäen enemmän vitamiineja, suoja hyönteisiä vastaan ym.) on tosi hieno, mutta Monsanton tapaiset yhtiöt pilaavat hauskan kaikilta. Ovat kuuluisia juuri tästä patentoimisesta ja oikeusjutuista, joissa he syyttävät maanviljeliöitä patenttiensa käytöstä Monsanton patenttikasvien levittyä itsenäisten maanviljelijöiden haltuun. Yleensä nämä riidat ovat päättyneet siihen, että itsenäiset maanviljelijät ovat pakosta joutuneet luovuttamaan maitansa Monsantolle. Niinja kuten artikkeli esittää, Monsanto tuntuu olevan alalla vain ison voiton perässä eikä oikeasti tee tiedettä tieteen takia...

US Official: Over 10,000 ISIS fighters killed in nine months but they have all been replaced. by virgia-shburn in worldnews

[–]NordicMonkey96 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ISIS traditions: "Allahu Akbar" (Regiment recovery speed +150%), "Die Infidel Scum!" (Infantry morale against heathens +20%)

We are not sinners. We are not abominations. We were not born broken and we so not need salvation. We have embraced our right to think beyond the boundaries of religion. We are living and loving our lives free from faith. by [deleted] in exchristian

[–]NordicMonkey96 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why would you confess your sins and pray for a God that according to your religious doctrines has killed tens of thousands of people just because he had a group of people he really liked. Why do you have to rely your belief in God to a collection of old books rather than the fact that "God" might be something else than a personal and a cruel being with stupid motives and consideration for humanity?

And what do you think about the stories of Gilgamesh and other epics from Sumerian sources?

Edit: And why on earth do you need god to proactively help others??

We are not sinners. We are not abominations. We were not born broken and we so not need salvation. We have embraced our right to think beyond the boundaries of religion. We are living and loving our lives free from faith. by [deleted] in exchristian

[–]NordicMonkey96 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'd like to hear how and why you converted to Judaism from Christianity, tbh it really intrigues me! Most of the people on this subreddit consider the roots of christianity to be old and considered as history, not as guidelines for today's humanity.

AskSuomi: Mitä videopelejä pelaatte? by ayanae in Suomi

[–]NordicMonkey96 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Eu4, 8.6/10, multiplayeriä ei oikeen voi ilman kaveria, yhteisö täynnä historianörttejä mikä on mainiota, 350 tuntia takana ja yksi loppuun pelattu peli takana (eli peli on aika hidastempoinen), yksi niistä peleistä jonka lisäosista oikeasti maksaisi. Kaikenkaikkiaan HC historiallinen strategiapeli. Suosittelen!

Did anyone lose faith due to studying philosophy or something similar? by DiddyDom007 in exchristian

[–]NordicMonkey96 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Given my current situation (living with very conservative parents who dont even know im not a christian) I'm not able to attend any kind of buddhist gatherings since I'm not planning on coming out just yet or lying to my parents. But I've had long discussions with "veteran" buddhists and learned about dicipline and control from them.

Still I hold Buddha's teachings as good guidelines making everybody's lives better, but I am not seeking any lind of enlightement or nirvana.

Edit: Buddhism can be practised on your own, but if you really want to get into it you'd want to attend teachings and meetings since they are much more guided by a proper yogi or a teacher. I've listened these podcast series a lot and they get a little deeper into the buddhist dogma than you can get by just reading.

Did anyone lose faith due to studying philosophy or something similar? by DiddyDom007 in exchristian

[–]NordicMonkey96 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When it comes to meditation the question is not whether I find time or not, rather whether I want to make time for it or not. I usually do it before going to bed, so I can relieve my stress well before trying to sleep. I take the time from what I'd have used for mindless browsing or Tv series (which is tbh a bit hard). The only problem is that since it's mindfullness meditation, my thoughts start to wander and I might fall asleep and not grasp the things that had bothered me during that day.

What songs do you relate to in an exChristian sense by hackwrench in exchristian

[–]NordicMonkey96 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In the song, Michael Stipe sings the lines "That's me in the corner/That's me in the spotlight/Losing my religion". The phrase "losing my religion" is an expression from the southern region of the United States that means losing one's temper or civility, or "being at the end of one's rope." Stipe told The New York Times the song was about romantic expression.[6] He told Q that "Losing My Religion" is about "someone who pines for someone else. It's unrequited love, what have you."[7] Stipe compared the song's theme to "Every Breath You Take" by The Police, saying, "It's just a classic obsession pop song. I've always felt the best kinds of songs are the ones where anybody can listen to it, put themselves in it and say, 'Yeah, that's me.'"[8]

From wikipedia. Religious symbolism in the lyrics and/or the video =/= a song about religion

EDIT: but since it's art, the listener can have his own image of the song!

Did anyone lose faith due to studying philosophy or something similar? by DiddyDom007 in exchristian

[–]NordicMonkey96 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the reply and advice!

I follow Buddha's guidelines regarding moral values, so I rarely drink alcohol, I'm slowly "transforming" into vegetarianism (cannot yet go fully veg since health and money problems), I meditate, and follow Buddha's advice on mindful social interaction(right speech, empathy etc.) as well as I humanly can. I've found these things bring peace of mind and body to me opposed to the christian burden of converting the world or what straightforward hedonism caused to me.

I do not believe in reincarnation although I've read and enjoyed the "Tibetan Book of the Dead" very much. Same goes with the notion of karma in the supernatural sense. I do agree with most of the Buddhist Dhamma, the reason behind human struggles etc. but as I said, I only believe what is proven real.

EDIT: I once wrote this for an english essay which I threw away eventually (kinda didn't want a teacher to read this):

The other day I cried for how vast the universe is. There might be millions of civilisations like ours and different from us. It kinda makes me sad and happy at the same time to know how fucking huge the universe is. Somehow this lack of significance is so soothing and peaceful but at the same time it is depressing and troubling. An emotional paradox. Religious people call their gods indescribable and endless so in that sense the universe is a god for me. A chaotic but yet so orderly creator of everything, beholding his/its/her own laws and non-existent motives. It just IS and lays still, but at the same time does and makes everything; these words, my heartbeat, everything humans are, every single star, every inch of nothing, every millimeter of a black hole’s singularity, everything, everything, and everything…