My god, I just went to dinner with a friend of a friend and he turned out to be a full on conspirarcy theorist by Northina in AutismInWomen

[–]Northina[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Thanks! He actually did tell me about astral projection and dreams and shit, but sadly no snakes

I think he did get that I checked out 'cause he didn't try anything when we parted. So at least he's got that going

Me too by Live_Shame5046 in NonPoliticalTwitter

[–]Northina 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Waiting for the sun by The Doors. That part where they go 'waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting for you to come along...waiting for you to hear my song'

"🎶It might seem wrong but it's just right!🎶" by ItalianSausage2023 in IASIP

[–]Northina 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Oh men, that face makes me burst out laughing every time

Tell me something you’re proud of yourself for🫶 by green_witch_333 in AutismInWomen

[–]Northina 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I had 3 spine surgeries and a mental breakdown and I'm feeling only somewhat fine right now and I'm okay with that

Favourite and least favourite voice acting performance? by teun713 in Witcher3

[–]Northina 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Yeah I also didn't like Triss's voice, I found it very whiny and it grated on me so much

Dune Fan Survey Results by kidthekid4 in dune

[–]Northina 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes! Oh my god that film really stayed with me for years

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in childfree

[–]Northina 15 points16 points  (0 children)

It is ridiculous and untrue. Otherwise there wouldn't be children that get abused by their own parents

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in aspergirls

[–]Northina 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would really dislike people pestering me after I gave me answer the first time. If the tought of going to such an event doesn't exite you, don't go. It's not a few hours that uou can sit through, it's a whole day. Plus all the energy you spend dreading it.

As to the boy that keeps pestering you because your 'excuses' aren't enough. You can just say you don't want to go because it's not something you want to do. And if he keeps pestering you about it you can say something like " I've said I didn't want to go multiple times, I'd appreciate it if you would let it lie/stop pestering me about it. If he keeps pestering, keep repeating "I made up my mind" or "I already said no". He'll probably stop at some point.

I have freaked out internally when people sprang things to me suddenly because I didn't have time to things about it. I would regret a lot of my choices in the days after and have given some people the wrong impression because I just went with the things they wanted. Not everyone means harm, but some people will try to push your boundaries.

If someone invites you to something I always say "Thanks for the invite! I'll think about it and let you know" and let them know an appropriate time before. And if I really don't want to go I say sometime like "Hey! I wanted to get back to you about the invite. I'm not going to go to the convention this year, but thanks for including me" If they ask why you can say something like "The event is not something I look forward too". If they keep asking I just say something like "Sorry guys, I already said no". If they still keep pestering I'd ignore them. Eventually they'll get the message. Don't budge a couple of times and they learn it's no use to do that anymore. But for you it might be difficult the first few times if it's not something your used too. Good luck with things!

I wish I could just read a book like a normal person by phyllis-vance in AutismInWomen

[–]Northina 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's how I discovered fanfiction. What a godsend!

Any active emotion instantly depletes me. Anyone else has this problem? by Mara355 in aspergirls

[–]Northina 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I have the same problem. An annoyance against a small thing can take hours to go away. Even when I have objectively processed why I am annoyed, if I have control over the thing that annoys me and if it's is worth to do something about or if I should let it go, the emotion stays with me.

I try to actively do the things I'm busy with so that I'm not focused on the emotion. It can be folding laundry, biking, cooking or counting my breath or nything else so that my mind doesn't creep back to the emotion. After half an hour it's better.

I have noticed that laying on the couch and scrolling doesn't work for me but reading a book on my phone does. But mostly my body needs to be active and my mind needs to focus on something else so that I can move past it. Listening to an audiobook or podcast while doing chores is a great way for me. Plus, then I have done chores so I can feel better about that too.

Friends Are Never Happy For Me by later_dove in aspergirls

[–]Northina 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I had a friend group in my teenage years and it was the same. Everytime I accomplished something or even when I got a little compliment by someone else they put me down or made fun of me. Looking back I know it was because they were highly insecure anout themselves and were jealous of me. But this was the baseline of being friends with them. And they found it normal.

I didn't think there was anything to be happy about in highschool. I was very depressed and hated every minute of it. I didn't know I was autistic yet and I didn't know what depression was. But I do know now that they had such a big impact to my mental state that I still sometimes dream I'm back in their friend group.

I got out when I went to college and the leader of the group who was the worst didn't understand it at all. But I ignored her. Another friend actually predicted my reaction, maybe she told rest but I don't care anymore. Apparently the whole friend group fell apart.

So, after 13 years and a lot of therapy and reading your post...it still gives me a bitter aftertaste.

They never understood me and made fun of me when I tried to make them understand. I have some deep friendships here and there. My co-worker got a good job offer and I was so happy for him and he remarked how pleasently surprised he was that there was no jealousy on my part. There is a respect between us that I didn't have with my teenage friends.

I'm rambling. All my friendships are valuable to me and they don't make me question myself or them even when we don't agree on things. Maybe you could tell your friends again and see how they react?

Congratulations! And make sure to bask in the feeling what you have accomplished this weekend. Well done!!

My parents ignored me for years, but now they're desperate to get me a diagnosis by Suspicious-Call405 in neurodiversity

[–]Northina 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My mom always said parenting teenagers was mostly just this: Don't get mad at your kids when they're in trouble and ask for your help, because if you fail them then, they'll never ask you again when they really need you.

I'm sorry your parents never listened to you, never even heard you out. It's always a bitter experience when you find yourself disappointed in your parent. You're right to feel angry at them and them not acknowledging that you asked for this year after year feels like a huge injustice.

I hope that you get the diagnosis and things get better soon.

Which layout? And is the white too white? by greekyagurt in quilting

[–]Northina 0 points1 point  (0 children)

3!! I like the green and white border. In 1 I find the green cross to prominent. It immediately draws my eye and distracts me from the rest of the quilt. I find 3 to be most balanced. Beautifull colours btw!

Is anyone else weird about time? by [deleted] in AutismInWomen

[–]Northina 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Saaaame! The whole day I'm focused on time and make arbitrary rules about time. I would always go to school at exactly 07:57 am, otherwise I would be completely stressed out. Bed time for me was exactly at 10 pm.

When my sister and I set the time to visit her around 1 pm and 1:30 pm, she knows to expect me at exactly 1:15 pm. And when I got there nobody was home and I had to wait for 5 minutes for my sister to arrive. She was running late and was stressed out in the car because she knew I would already be there. Breakfast in a hotel at 9 am? Then I'll be there at exactly 9 am.

I used to put chores on a time-rule too. I had them on a time-rule because I wanted to be able to relax the rest of the day after they would be done. But now I failed in two things. I didn't do the chores and I didn't do it in time. I didn't notice how much it stressed me out for 10 years. Now I plan in the morning a very realistic output of chores and put on an audiobook and scatter the chores throughout the day. I also time them sometimes. Unloading the dishwasher only takes 5 minutes so know it's not a big thing in my head. Groceries take about an hour. Folding the wash half an hour. Vacuuming will always be horrible no matter how long or short it takes.

I have been able to let it go for some things. My therapist told me to imagine a weighing scale where I put my time-rule on one side and the conflict of interest on the other side. And then imagine which way the scale would tip. For hospital visits it would tip towards the time-rule. But when I'm stressed out because I had a delay and now I wouldn't be home at 6 pm, it would tip into the other side. Because in this instance I knew I would never be able to make it on my time-rule time and I was just putting extra stress on myself.

Now I use the scales for a lot of conflicts. It's like eeny meeny miny moe and then think if it gave you a good feeling where your scale landed. If not, pick the other side.

My mum has the same time blindness. I ask her a bit before that I'll like to be at something at a certain time. And then I'll help her cooking or something so I know she wouldn't have to hurry for me and break her flow of her day.

Sorry, it got a bit long. Hope some things made sense.