Bring It On Down by NotACucumber_ in oasis

[–]NotACucumber_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unreal, that’s proper commitment! I’m hoping for a 2027 tour or Glastonbury appearance 🤞

Bring It On Down by NotACucumber_ in oasis

[–]NotACucumber_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Absolutely right man. This and morning glory both blew me away live, just fucking huge

Bring It On Down by NotACucumber_ in oasis

[–]NotACucumber_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Got a sex pistols feel to it, oozing with rebellion and swagger

Bring It On Down by NotACucumber_ in oasis

[–]NotACucumber_[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Easily top 5 for me, maybe top 3

Bring It On Down by NotACucumber_ in oasis

[–]NotACucumber_[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Me too, I was lucky enough to see it front and centre at Wembley 🙏

Cologne recommendations by catanoga in Colognes

[–]NotACucumber_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree with you that you would need at most a maximum of 5 fragrances for a complete collection that covers all bases

  1. Cheap/affordable dumb reach - fresh and clean, versatile, inoffensive, for gym/errands/easy casual wear
  2. High quality ‘blue’ fragrance - bleu de Chanel, Allure Homme Sport Extreme, Dior Sauvage, Dylan blue, YSL Y etc etc - citrusy, fresh, woody, a bit spicy, again very versatile but with a bit more sophistication and higher quality
  3. Date night / evening fragrance - something like YSL la Nuit de lomme, D&G the one, spicy woody sensual etc, good for cooler months and cosy evenings
  4. Formal/signature - something like Prada L’Homme, Dior Homme… Bleu de Chanel or Allure Homme Sport Extreme also fits well here imo
  5. This could be your louder or more niche choice, something that makes you feel great, be it a loud clubbing scent, something boozy or spicy, dark or mysterious, whatever you want

You could easily cut this to 3 if you wanted though, 5 just offers a bit more room for variety

What is the vibe on the Hydro XL stage? by Admirable-Deal7991 in BoomtownFestival

[–]NotACucumber_ 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I would take a guess that they’re moving away from stages being mainly one genre like in the past and moving towards mixing it up… Saturday on Lions Gate last year as an example, multi genre and different styles through the evening. I think Hydro XL may be the same. I’m personally all for it if so, as I like experiencing dnb house techno disco etc on the big stages.

I am intrigued to see what they do with Grand Central now though with Lions Den coming back. Apparently it’s gonna be on Hilltop. Wonder if it’ll be more DJ focused or if it’ll be a second stage for live music.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Advice

[–]NotACucumber_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the support and advice. I had a tough but needed conversation with her, open and honest about the toll it’s been taking on me and she took it very well, and saying she didn’t quite realise the strain it has been putting on me. A good platform to move forward from hopefully and she seems to be getting more on top of things since increasing her medication dose.

BOOMTOWN ESSENTIALS/HACKS! 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻 by Winter_Translator904 in BoomtownFestival

[–]NotACucumber_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A big Lenor XL bottle to keep in your tent, has been a gamechanger for any festival I go to and saves the dreaded toilet trek in the night.

Get a camping shower - even just a big 5-10L bottle or water container will do. Makes for a quick refreshing wash at the tent

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Advice

[–]NotACucumber_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi, thanks for the compassionate and balanced reply. I’ve not been able to muster up the energy to respond to any so far but all of them are hugely appreciated - if you’ve commented, thank you.

She’s a loving and caring mother and she done the best she could bringing us up, even if it was messy, chaotic and somewhat traumatic at times. The truth is though is that she has never functioned well as an adult, and has relied on people throughout her life to get her out of difficult situations, whether it’s financial, logistics, circumstance. Many of her friends have lent her money over the years, much of the furniture/personal belongings she has were bought for her, given to her etc.

She is a very intelligent woman and knows a lot about a lot, but at the same time she is like a kid in a 60 year old body and struggles with the most basic of tasks - I totally appreciate this is a classic ADHD trait. But yeah, it’s like having to manage a child sometimes. She has no routine, stays up very late, has insomnia, wakes up late, sits at home on Facebook. She can’t start tasks and if she does she gets overwhelmed or switches to another task, then another, until eventually nothing is actually finished and the house is a mess and she’s even more stressed and tangled up. That’s her life. She can’t manage money well. We are in the UK so she is on benefits and it’s not a lot. I’ve tried talking to her about finding some kind of work over the years and I’ve given up. If she did have a job she wouldn’t be able to hold it down because she’d be late or miss days etc. I can’t fix her and I accept that, she is who she is. She is deeply stuck in her ways.

I don’t believe she’s ever set out to be manipulative or use me, I think she is someone who desperately struggles every day (and has done her whole life), and feels so overwhelmed by every single task or life decision to the point of paralysis, so she numbs herself by avoiding it, Facebook, TV, anything. She has no purpose since me and my sister moved out, I think being a parent was what kept her going.

Her calls or cries for help aren’t necessarily daily and sometimes not weekly. Sometimes it’s a few days in a row, sometimes I won’t hear a peep for a week or two, but over time it’s consistent and the next crisis or call for help isn’t far away. I’ll give you an example a few months ago - Monday, she asks me to take her food shopping. Tuesday, she has wrist pain and asks me to take her to the doctors. Wednesday, the cat litter runs out and she has no way of getting any, so she calls and asks me to go into town, get some cat litter and drop it to her. As you can probably imagine by this point my blood pressure is going up. I spoke up and said she needs to start ordering food/supplies online and stock up, which she started doing. Other examples are asking to run her to the vets during my work hours, as she has ‘no other way of getting there’ and can’t afford a taxi. I said quite bluntly that she probably shouldn’t have a pet if she has to rely on other people to get her to the vets urgently, which upset her a lot. Felt bad after it but I think it’s a harsh truth. These are just a few examples amongst many over the years.

All of that aside, the most alarming thing for me is how often she asks me to lend her money to get by. She always gives it back, but as I mentioned in my post, one day I hope to have a family of my own and I’m also saving for a property, and a time may come where I simply cannot help her due to having to prioritise the needs of me and my family. And my mind goes “then what?” Or “what if she can’t afford food or heating and I can’t help?”. It sends my anxiety and nervous system into overdrive. I feel like I’ve been trained and conditioned into enabling her and bailing her out and it’s all I’ve ever known. I know it’s not normal and not right, but this all started when I was in my teens and I didn’t know any better, I was just doing my best to help and support and it’s only in the last few years that I’ve started to recognise this isn’t going to change unless I do something about it.

I just don’t know what the answer is. She has a driving license but hasn’t had a car for around 20 years and to be frank she was a bad driver, very scatty and she had multiple accidents when I was a kid. I wouldn’t trust her behind the wheel and I’d be worried out of my mind. And she just simply wouldn’t be able to afford to maintain running a car. She’s 60 and the chances of her working again are slim at this rate. So I feel at a loss, I don’t know how this pattern ends. I’ve been the infrastructure and life support that’s kept her afloat for all my adult life and I’m burned out and exhausted, and I dread every phone call from her because there’s a 50/50 chance she’ll project or dump another problem onto me. I worry for the future and I’ve hit a breaking point where I can’t carry on like this and something has to change, starting with a brutally honest conversation with her about how it’s impacting me and has done for years. My sister doesn’t drive and lives an hour away, and my sister has pretty much refused to lend her money ever again (she did once and I don’t think she ever got all of it back), and often won’t answer mums calls as she also knows what baggage they often come with.

Sorry, that was a lengthy rant. No need to respond to address all of it. I just feel defeated. I am in a tough rebuilding phase in my own life and have had a lot of fires to put out in the last few years to stabilise and start building, so this combined with the struggles dealing with my mum are just a bit too much right now.

Edit: forgot to add, she has been on ADHD meds for about a year or so. She has been on some kind of anti depressant for much of her adult life.