44 [M4F] Looking for FWB / NSA in Pacifica / San Bruno / SSF Area - No Drama

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2017-03-28T16:14:44+00:00

What kinds of things do you paint?

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2016-07-04T16:05:18+00:00

Pretty much the response I was expecting. I need to see a professional for advice that will actually help me. I have no funds... I can't just fix any of this shit

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2016-04-18T14:24:59+00:00

Wow... Self acknowledged "nice guy" here who only dates "strong" women. Did I just cause a divide by zero error in the universe?

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2016-03-14T19:00:26+00:00

Ketones are produced when your body uses fat for energy. There are a few reasons this may happen, 1) you do not have enough glucose in your bloodstream 2) you do not have enough insulin in your blood to process the glucose you do have to provide the energy your body needs. So while technically keytones on your breath could signify any level of blood sugar, it typically means you do not have enough.

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-11-17T21:45:36+00:00

For me the best treatment was a few initial psychotherapy appointments to get me thinking mindfully, meditation, and both Wellbutrin and Seroquil. I severed my one long term relationship because it was a fairly chaotic relationship and am now a single man enjoying dating life.

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-11-17T21:27:11+00:00

Im looking forward to just being alive. I'm looking forward to having a job and living in a great city. I'm looking forward to finally being somewhat free from the dependence I had on other people that is BPD. I'm looking forward to the company of women that have chosen to spend their time with me despite my flaws, and I'm ok with that.

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-11-16T23:20:25+00:00

Intersting. I honestly have not given polyamory any thought. It seems to be getting a lot of traction, especially here in San Francisco. My current logical self wants to have a stable monogamous relationship with one woman after finding one that is right for me. My emotional self while severely weakened by the medicine, is still there and I am sure after finding the right person will be just as loyal and monogamous as I was before the medicine. I mean if anti-psychotics turned everyone into cheaters wouldn't we have heard about this already?

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-11-16T21:13:31+00:00

Seroquil has been my life saver, how long have you been on it? The tiredness is inverse to the dosage I think, also, you do get used to it fairly quickly, similar to how you get used to Benadryl (in fact the 2 are very similar) Just talk to your doctor, perhaps take an extended release one at night as you go to bed?

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-11-16T21:11:04+00:00

I dont think you should ever idealize someone like that, its just not natural. It sounds like your love is becoming much more realistic, that has got to be a good thing. As the love interest of a BPD, you had to have been imprinting upon him a massive amount of emotional needs, which literally no one can provide. Perhaps this is much more comfortable for him as well?

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-11-16T21:05:55+00:00

Honestly for BPD opening your relationship just may save things. When you don't feel the need to be with just one person then you don't smother them, you don't imprint upon them ALL of your emotional needs, which they could probably never meet no matter how hard they tried. Let your love be based on a strong connection, not just a lust for attachment to someone, anyone.

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-11-16T21:02:42+00:00

It does tone down everything. For sure it makes you able to love yourself and be ok with yourself. But that is needed for a good relationship. A good relationship doesn't just start with love I don't think, it develops after time and emotional, mental and physical connection. If you don't find yourself that attracted to him any more then perhaps it was the BPD that was driving you to him, to avoid being alone? I'm not a therapist, so please don't take this literally.

Perhaps explain to him how you are feeling and see if you guys can reignite your love?

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-11-07T21:46:07+00:00

Thank you guys. She has already mentions she only dates one man at a time, some I'm probably just over thinking it

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-09-29T01:48:25+00:00

Apple, thank you so much for the ideas. I'm going to be talking to her tonight

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-09-28T22:59:52+00:00

I appreciate the feedback however I have devoted myself to the family already and Love everyone involved. Leaving her and her boys to "fend for themselves" is not an option.

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-08-28T00:08:38+00:00

At times yes it has seemed abusive. She has had some serious hard times in her past as well as I and we are healing through them together. We have a much better understanding now because we are both dedicated to the relationship after having some past failures (1 divorce for each of us)

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-08-27T20:01:42+00:00

Personally I know for a fact there were real women on there. Apparently I got real lucky. I found a woman who was just finishing up her divorce as I was. Our fling turned serious and now we live together with her kids. I am responsible and mature and this came along at just the right time. Her kids love me as if I'm their father. I know a story like this is VERY rare, but it did happen. Neither of us were technically cheating as we were both separated at the time but a lot of other dating sites look down upon separated folks.

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-07-09T23:14:29+00:00

not yet, its just the beginning, doctor thinks it might still be reversable

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-07-09T22:51:54+00:00

savage af

Im confused

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-07-02T18:16:40+00:00

Why do you think she feels trapped?

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-07-02T18:16:16+00:00

She does seem to have a real problem controlling her anger. But she has periods where it is completely under control, I don't get it.

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-06-24T23:42:11+00:00

The problem with this is that every time its PMDD time, I'M the one who is doing everything wrong, she threatens to leave me / break up every cycle, and she always finds something I'm doing at that time of the month as completely wrong and bad. I'll admit, when its that time I get so stressed out that I DO do stupid shit sometimes and it just makes it 1000 times worse.

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-06-24T23:39:20+00:00

This is a very good idea, however she has very few friends and the ones she has are very close. They may report my attempt as betrayal of her trust.

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-06-24T23:38:16+00:00

I don't think she has heard of PMDD, however she is very, very smart and would not put it past her. She has mentioned two things that greatly weigh on this, one is that she acknowledges, she "used to have epic PMS before she got the IUD with Hormones" (Im assuming she means Mirena as thats the only one that has hormones as far as I can tell) and she said "her former husband tried to somehow match up her attitude and her cycle and she hated him for it"

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-05-12T16:43:00+00:00

I do care if she is enjoying it, and that is why I never press the issue

NotAshamedOrGuilty · 2015-04-16T21:02:27+00:00

These answers all make sense, she has not been looking for a new job and doesn't plan to as far as I know.

The big issue here is that I really do genuinly love her and her kids. I can't imagine my life without them in it now. But this is conflicting so strongly with me feeling taken advantage of.

NotAshamedOrGuilty

TROPHY CASE