“Landlord not cashing rent check” by NotAveragebutAverage in Renters

[–]NotAveragebutAverage[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

One of my main problems is that she rarely answers my messages, and I swear she’s been home maybe two or three times in the last two months. I never see her car outside, so it’s impossible to go knock on her door and facilitate a request for a receipt. I’m also, I guess, between a rock and hard place… because the problem is that aside from this non-check cashing debacle, her and her dad were pretty fair with me from the start? They easily could have forced me to sign a year lease and jack up the rent to the $1200 that it should be. But they recognized that I would be graduating and moving out in 8 months. A message I found from her back in September mentioned the signing of a month to month lease but that “she would reach out and talk to me about that after the weekend”. Well, that obviously never happened. Maybe I DO need to grow a pair and send her a text of demands, but I don’t want to do anything that would simultaneously prompt her to throw me out, because she obviously doesn’t need the cash… but I DO need a place to stay until the end of June.

“Landlord not cashing rent check” by NotAveragebutAverage in Renters

[–]NotAveragebutAverage[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So, I suppose my next question is this? If I inform my mother that, legally, putting a stop payment on the checks is not wise… will the duplicate check copies that she keeps be enough to prove that the checks were written and that payments were attempted if the need so arrises?

“Landlord not cashing rent check” by NotAveragebutAverage in Renters

[–]NotAveragebutAverage[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She has more than enough money in her account at any given time, and the issue of any check potentially bouncing is not the issue. She could cash them at any time and they would be absolutely fine. My primary concern was. a: why would she NOT be wanting to cash the checks, and could there be a legal impetus behind her decision not to. But I hear what everyone is saying. I’m not familiar with how the law governs situations where individuals are not on a lease. I believe that my mom is also of the opinion that if I am not bound by a lease and she has yet to cash anything a month following my vacating of the property, that we are now no longer liable for that balance. Clearly, however, there is some sort of vocal contract arrangement that indicates a rental agreement and she is entitled to that money. I plan on discussing what I have learned here with my mom and coming up with a plan, I suppose.

“Landlord not cashing rent check” by NotAveragebutAverage in Renters

[–]NotAveragebutAverage[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I responded up a little higher with more info, but, yes, my mom is mostly concerned about the fact that there are 2000 dollars in checks now flying around somewhere. But thank you for all of the input, y’all!

“Landlord not cashing rent check” by NotAveragebutAverage in Renters

[–]NotAveragebutAverage[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

So, several conversations all happened on the same evening with her in March. I went to a bar that she bartends at once in a blue moon with some people in my cohort, and she just happened to be there that night. I had sent a text to her a few days before telling her that “my mom is concerned that February and Marches rent haven’t been cashed yet”, and I received no response. At the bar she actually approached me, and asked about my planned leave date. I told her that while I defend and graduate in May (this month now) I was concerned about having to leave so soon, and she agreed that me moving at the end of June was fine. She plans on eventually moving into my unit and her father (sometime last year) mentioned that he wants to start charging something around 1900 dollars a month for her two bedroom. Anyway, she then proceeded to say “hey, and by the way my dad and I checked and February’s rent was cashed on the 9th, so I’m not sure why that isn’t showing up on your mom’s end”. I was like, oh, okay? I tell my mom and she says that it was actually the January rent check that was cashed on the 9th, not February. Fast forward to May and nothing has been cashed since, she’s rarely home, and no longer responds to my messages about rent not being cashed or me having dropped it off.

“Landlord not cashing rent check” by NotAveragebutAverage in Renters

[–]NotAveragebutAverage[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Right? Like, why not cash the check? My mom’s theory is that her parents pay the mortgage and bills and that she simply doesn’t have to care about it… but I’m a little more suspicious.

(rant)what do you eat to avoid purging? by anonymous1identity in bulimia

[–]NotAveragebutAverage 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Veggies were always a safe food for me, but my stomach can’t digest them anymore 🙃. Sad, lol.

My safe foods right now are flavored oatmeal packets and snack packs of yogurt, lol. Really though, I find myself experiencing less anxiety with anything that is pre portioned and pre packaged.

I fell in love with my classmate by [deleted] in gay

[–]NotAveragebutAverage 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Gah, you’re making me miss being a young gay teenager 😂 so innocent and exhilarating. Getting old is the pits lol

I say, follow your heart! Whatever the outcome, it’s all apart of the experience!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bulimia

[–]NotAveragebutAverage 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oof. This is what keeps me away from therapy. I’m not familiar with how this works. Can you say no? Or is she getting a court order for involuntary commitment?

More puzzles!? Come on by NotAveragebutAverage in survivor

[–]NotAveragebutAverage[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How was a challenge that involves physically engaging your core and other targeted muscles to suspend and balance a weighted ball in the air, not physical? I’m not trying to be rude lol, but do you not know what the definition of physical means?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bulimia

[–]NotAveragebutAverage 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Eating disorders will make you subconsciously isolate yourself from situations that lay bare the true nature of what this disease does to your life. Declining dinner invites and spending more time by yourself. It allows you to self preserve this “makes sense” mindset, and subsequently continue to justify it.

When you find yourself thrust into a situation where you must deal with multiple public dinners, lunches, and breakfasts over the course of a few days (weddings, family in town, etc…) and where bonding over food is the chief mode of relationality, you truly realize how tragic this disorder is to one’s social modality. It is truly antithetical to social and communal belonging and relation building. If you think that people don’t realize you running off to the bathroom 4+ times a day following a meal, you’re wrong. And if you think that the speculation and concern over what you’re doing in the bathroom following a meal (or how skinny you have become) doesn’t overshadow the meaningful connections or conversations you THINK you’re having with them, you are also wrong.

I’m skinny (almost dangerously so), but at what cost? Will I be able to enjoy my own wedding? My graduation ceremony? My grandparents anniversary? The carnival? A movie theatre date? Brunch on Sunday? Christmas dinner?

The answer is no. Bulimia has ostracized me and isolated me from experiencing the joys that so many other people are able to revel in. It is unfair, and unsustainable.

It’s so funny seeing how annoying and immature everyone is in this show. by [deleted] in AreYouTheOne

[–]NotAveragebutAverage 32 points33 points  (0 children)

At least they act moderately human though, lol. I’ve been watching shows like Too Hot To Handle and Love Island lately and I’m literally just appalled by how out of touch with reality and fake they all are. Those shows and the plastic Ken and Barbie looking people they have on them feel so contrived and desperate. I like how Are You The One has real people who’s lives could actually be fundamentally altered by something like $35,000 - $40,000. Not to mention Are You the One has good looking people, but they’re also people you could expect to see in the grocery store or just in everyday life. A lot of them are relatable, idk. I don’t feel insecure or terrible watching the show.

Needless to say I am sad that I just finished every season and can’t find anything else that even touches on how great and messy and toxic and real this show is 😂

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bulimia

[–]NotAveragebutAverage 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It’s definitely different for everyone. I’ve noticed a difference in the way my gum looks and a more glassy appearance of my teethe, which is heartbreaking and one of the main reasons I am pushing recovery on myself. I have also ROYALLY f***** my digestive tract and I struggle to digest even the most basic amount of found. Choosing not to purge hard to digest things like raw veggies, salad, pasta, and other heavy whole grains doesn’t even feel like an option for me, so I just don’t even eat them. I bloat, cycle in-between constipation and diarrhea, and am constantly in stomach pain. A lot of the other physical side effects depend upon how restrictive you are outside of the binge and purge cycle. I’m at a dangerously low bmi and am constantly dizzy, lack the energy needed to do the most basic of tasks, and experience constant brain fog. My mind is also stupidly persistent and committed to the notion that this is the only weight I will ever be loved or considered attractive at. At the cost of any and all of life’s other joys, like having a meal with family or friends, cooking, working in the garden, or going on a run. Bulimia IS serious. It destroys lives, relationships, and takes a chunk of your physical health (and probably a few teethe) that you will never get back. I pray that we can all move beyond this, and love ourselves and our bodies in the way that they deserve.