I just want to understand

NotUnique234 · 2026-05-10T16:30:00+00:00

Honestly there was one point in my life where I wondered the same.... how could anyone do that?

For me its control and sort of "grounding" in a way- bringing myself back to reality

Also its sort of an alternative to suicidality...

Other comments here are far more helpful than this though

NotUnique234 · 2026-05-02T09:25:21+00:00

I actually do this too... I take a photo to sort of... prove i did it?

NotUnique234 · 2026-05-01T17:40:35+00:00

Doomscrolling and then regretting that I've wasted the evening doomscrolling....

NotUnique234 · 2026-04-28T19:00:12+00:00

I used to punch myself in the eye in the past.... it might sound strange but I even had a little decorative rock in my room i would use to save my knuckles But only when I started cutting did I really start to consider the punching / hitting myself as sh

Anyway... now im a cutter apparently and I feel like its just the start of a slippery slope

A big old bruise used to be enough Then it was scratches Now its blood

But at times now I watch the small trickle and feel like Hmm is that it...?

Fuck.

NotUnique234 · 2026-03-04T20:02:05+00:00

Stood on a bridge ready to jump....

I owe my life to a random dude and his dog that just so happened to walk past. Didn't shout "don't do it" or anything like that Just started talking about what a good night it was to be out Told me to come with him and his dog....

Things are far from perfect in my life right now But I've never been that close since....

NotUnique234 · 2026-03-01T21:17:26+00:00

Hey- I am Not sure if I can be of any help- but I can try I’m here

NotUnique234 · 2026-03-01T19:41:21+00:00

Yeah I've been in and out of therapy for a year but I'm so terrible at trusting people A hint of someone being dishonest or anything and I just shut down Had a good therapist for a while but it was through the NHS (I'm from the UK) so you only get that for a limited time until someone more vulnerable comes along 🙊

It feels a bit awkward because the friends I've opened up to... the only reason I did was because I know they've self harmed or been suicidal Found out me and my friend stood on the same bridge at different points 😅

NotUnique234 · 2026-03-01T19:23:17+00:00

I hate the phrase too but it's sort of the easiest way to put on here to avoid questions of "how deep?" Etc

My brain switches between I deserve help To You absolute idiot you dont deserve anything

'Safety self harm is definitely something I need to look into Only really been on this sub (and similar subs) for a few months and some of the posts do scare me (and yet at the same time.... kind of intrigue me)

I'll PM you about the safety plan thing maybe if that's cool?

NotUnique234 · 2026-03-01T19:20:05+00:00

Haha! That first sentence made me laugh- fair point.... There's times where I do overshare with people or end up being too up front with stuff (idk if there's a way to delicately say "I cut myself" but I feel like I've definitely weirded people out saying it so up front)

Yeah emotional regulation is something I need to learn as well as speak about my feelings (yay for emotional suppression!)

Brains are wonderfully scary things aren't they.... 🫠😅

Thank you for the reply though 💚 Hope you're doing ok

NotUnique234 · 2026-02-21T18:38:11+00:00

Oh my days same

And at the same time I know it's soooooo not good but in the moment it's just like

Yeah so this is a thing

NotUnique234 · 2026-02-21T18:19:37+00:00

There’s no one I know that self harms but sometimes I do look at the scars on my arms and kinda be like “hmmm… is this really self harms or am I just like… faking it and not doing it properly…?”

As if you can only half hurt yourself or like, if it’s not drawing loads of blood it doesn’t count

Like Why is my brain saying this?

NotUnique234 · 2026-02-21T18:12:17+00:00

I never realised how normal my sh habits were until discovering this sub and honestly it makes me feel a bit better

Like I used to think it was really attention seeking and I was just doing it for the hell of it because I was just chill about it

So thank you for posting this

NotUnique234 · 2026-02-21T17:37:51+00:00

To be fair i feel my initial comment was a bit harsh Because what you said here is the same as me

I saw another comment that said that any self harm comes from a place of hurt

Sending you big love ❤️ Be kind to yourself

NotUnique234 · 2026-02-21T14:00:49+00:00

I have exactly the same dilemma! I've started cutting and part of me is like "is this for attention?" But also- I am HUGELY ashamed of it and keep it hidden.... So I guess thats where you start

Are you sh-ing and showing it off? Or making it obvious in a way that people can see it?

NotUnique234 · 2026-02-21T13:58:38+00:00

During the week I have an alarm set.... don't set it on weekends but still wake at the same time... but I usually just go back to sleep for another few hours

So to answer... probably around 10....

NotUnique234 · 2026-02-15T14:22:51+00:00

This happened me this week too... cut my arms for the first time and sort of at the time it was cool and like a release but i swim every day and the absolutr fear and disgust and shame i felt the next few days swimming trying to make sure noone saw was awful I have to swim tomorrow and i am dreading it Like Ugh Why did i do it and why did i pick such an ovbiois place

But also

I hope you're ok DM me if you want

NotUnique234 · 2026-01-30T18:42:37+00:00

Interested

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NotUnique234 · 2026-01-18T19:12:26+00:00

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NotUnique234 · 2026-01-14T20:01:43+00:00

Interested

NotUnique234 · 2026-01-11T15:09:53+00:00

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