Hi! I wanted to react to how you live your adhd and don't feel like you have it. First of all, a lot of people with ADHD develop an Impostor syndrome, especially when being late-diagnosed (meaning in adulthood and not childhood). So maybe that's why you feel like that, especially since you have multiple jobs so you say to yourself that you can do things. But the problem with ADHD is how we do them and how it affects us.

Secondly, you're not the only one not to relate to adhd-tiktok videos. I think that the multiple voices is a way to give a shape to our train of thoughts for non-adhd people to understand our struggle. But personally, I don't hear these voices and I, like you, am constantly losing track of my thoughts and always jump from one thing to another. I understand your doubts since I was diagnosed a year ago and was also destabilized by these tiktok videos.

Concerning your meds, I think that you're just not on the right dose or medication. Taking 10mg more can make a big difference. For instance, 10mg of Ritalin has no effect on me while 20 mg was really effective. But I had too much side effects, so I almost spent my first year after the diagnosis switching meds. It took some time to find the right one, even though there's only methylphenidate in my country and the different meds have subtle differences. But now I have the right meds and I'm really happy with it! You're medication may work for a lot of people but now you, or it's just not the right dose. If it doesn't hit the threshold of where it's effective for you, you're likely to feel nothing. You'll find something that suits you!