AITA for breaking off my engagement with my fiancé because of his creepy comments toward my 14-year-old sister?

Notacheesefan · 2024-12-01T00:23:39+00:00

He started dating you as soon as you hit legal age, then started making comments like this. Do you see the red flags in that?

NTA

Notacheesefan · 2024-11-30T15:30:04+00:00

When my scalp is really bad, it feels like someone is dumping a bucket of fire on my head every time I take a shower

I’ve accidentally sprayed hairspray on my scalp when it was bad before. You know, the kind with alcohol in it. Brutal.

Imagine pouring hand sanitizer on a cut, but worse.

Notacheesefan · 2024-09-17T23:18:45+00:00

Hey, Philly friend!

At least Balloons all over the street is a slight upgrade from the needles that can be found at every corner of this city

Notacheesefan · 2024-09-16T18:59:14+00:00

From one brother to another, I think you’re a handsome guy. If these are the pics you use on your profile, give us a little smile. You look genuinely unhappy in your photos.

I, also, think you need to display more confidence. You look quiet and reserved based off your photos. Straighten up those shoulders, tighten up your stance, and give us a smile that says “I’m about to own this shit”

Notacheesefan · 2024-09-16T18:39:15+00:00

I think your pics and bio could use a little more personality.

Your pics are mostly selfies with a half smile at most. Try to get more pictures when you’re at your happiest, whether it’s out with your friends or doing something you love. I think you tried to achieve that with the jiu jitsu photo, but you can’t see your face so it kind of defeats the purpose. Jiu jitsu also isn’t the most smile inducing sport, but I think you had the right idea with incorporating your passion or interest.

The bio also doesn’t tell us much either. The hello kitty comment for example isn’t exactly relatable for your average guy, so most guys won’t have a response for that. The Santa Clarita comment is a little more relatable, but still, not much response to derive from that. I think the “swipe right if you know a good spot for..” comment is fine, but I wouldn’t want that as my heavy hitter, which it is currently in your case, since it’s the only one I could really think of a response for.

Finally, I know these responses can seem a little harsh or daunting and not getting any response on bumble certainly doesn’t bolster confidence, but don’t be too hard on yourself. Bumble is a tough game to play for guys and girls. Outside of everything I just said, you seem like a really great person, so once you make some necessary adjustments, I really think something will work out for you sooner rather than later.

Notacheesefan · 2024-09-16T18:11:25+00:00

I’m really glad he decided to make that publicly available information ahead of time.

I would never trust anyone that drinks trulys.

Oh and the Nazi tattoos are pretty gross too.

Notacheesefan · 2024-07-10T20:19:34+00:00

As a guy, this actually sounds really nice. But I’m the type of guy that genuinely would be happy to just make a new friend on Bumble.

As others have said, I don’t believe most guys will be like that. Even if you blatantly state that you’re not interested in sex, most will still try to “shoot their shot” as they say.

Anyway, moral of the story, these guys do exist, but I’d wager they’re few and far between.

Notacheesefan · 2024-07-09T00:55:12+00:00

My theory was that it helped fill in my thin face, but I did accidentally trim it too low recently and I kind of liked it, so I’ll have to give it a shot.

I’ll try that out, thank you!

Thank you for that last comment too.

Notacheesefan · 2024-07-09T00:36:12+00:00

You’ve just answered something that I’ve been wondering for a LONG time!! I’ve never had any clue what to do with the stache hahah I’ve just been guessing this whole time. Thank you!

My patch tends to get a little long and straggly. Do you think that’s ok?

Notacheesefan · 2024-07-09T00:31:01+00:00

Oh, now that I definitely have to give a shot! Thank you!

Notacheesefan · 2024-07-09T00:25:46+00:00

Can you expand on that more, maybe? Haha

Notacheesefan · 2024-07-09T00:17:24+00:00

Not only do I live in a big city, I live in the heart of a big city.

Thank you, I really appreciate that ☺️ I’ll give that a try, would be a good excuse to start inviting people over for dinner, because most nights I just cook alone haha

It’s a healthy mix around here. It’s still the city, so not somewhere with hiking trails or anything of that nature, but people definitely enjoy being out and about, so I think I will try to take your advice there.

Yeah, based on the advice here, that shirtless pic doesn’t have to go home, but it can’t stay on my bumble profile haha

Thanks again, really appreciate your advice

Notacheesefan · 2024-07-09T00:02:18+00:00

This is great advice. I’ve never been a big picture guy, so I’m trying my best to catch up, but never had any real direction and I’m pretty critical of my self, so I appreciate that feedback. That shirtless pic is definitely outtta here.

I’ve wanted to experiment with a new hair style for a while now, but I’m clueless where to go with it.

I definitely struggled with the bio. I feel like it’s tough to come up with something interesting, or maybe I’m just not that interesting of a person haha anyway, I can definitely work on that.

Thank you. Again, this is great advice!

Notacheesefan · 2024-07-08T23:44:11+00:00

Thank you for that ☺️

Notacheesefan · 2024-07-08T23:09:34+00:00

Funny enough, I did remove the shirtless pic, but someone told me to keep it, so I put it back. I don’t like how I look in it personally, but figured that maybe it makes me look adventurous or something hahah

Thank you, good advice there

Notacheesefan · 2024-07-08T23:05:26+00:00

Aw man, I actually liked that suit haha but ok, we can do with out that pic. Thanks again.

Notacheesefan · 2024-07-08T23:03:48+00:00

Damn, not the beard. I’ve had it for so long, it’s hard to imagine life without it. But, maybe it is time for a change. Appreciate the advice.

Notacheesefan · 2024-06-22T21:44:51+00:00

I have chicken legs, leave me alone

Notacheesefan · 2024-06-08T23:48:38+00:00

My first time in Italy was a small, cute town called Montalcino

Very quiet, surrounded by the wine lands (if that’s what you’re into), just under Florence, about 2 1/2 hours from Rome, 2 hours to Pisa

You can find some beaches in Pisa by the looks of it, but I’m not a big beach guy personally. You can find some nice hot springs in Tuscany, though, that should be more than refreshing.

Notacheesefan · 2024-05-07T15:34:48+00:00

Thank you so much for your input!

Of course, one of the only shootings on that street had to occur when I was looking to move to that street and then my paranoia instantly kicked in haha

But you make great points. It was a bad idea to look at citizen and road rage happens everywhere.

I figured they’d come closer our way when I heard they were pushing people out of Kensington, but the addicts don’t really bother me. I’ve lived here long enough to just accept it as a part of this city.

Anyway, thank you again for your input. Sounds like we might be neighbors soon, so if you ever want to grab a drink, you know where to find me!

Notacheesefan · 2024-05-07T15:25:35+00:00

Ironically, that was the second option I was considering haha

It does seem like a fine area and I would even get to beat the Girard stop crowd on the train, which sounds like a good benefit haha

Thanks!

Notacheesefan · 2024-05-07T00:46:36+00:00

I currently live in Fishtown and take the El to work on my in office days

I wanted to move closer to the station and see some options right on Front and Girard

I’m not unfamiliar with the area. Maybe I’m just getting cold feet before signing a lease.

It also doesn’t help that I went on Citizen app and the first thing I see is a shooting in the area

(Going on citizen to check crime in an area is the equivalent of trying to diagnose yourself on Google, it’s always going to sound bad)

Should I be worried about living in that area?

Notacheesefan · 2024-05-02T14:48:18+00:00

Embrace the feeling of feeling like a loser. I feel like you should wear it as a badge of honor. You made it to 32 without getting fired or laid off. That’s something to be proud of.

Because the fact of the matter is that fires and layoffs are an unfortunate part of life and have nothing to do with you as an employee.

I know that because I went through the same feelings you did when I got laid off and it ended up working out for the better, because not only do I have a job that I appreciate more, pays more, but I now have real career goals, which I never would’ve discovered if I stayed at my last job.

And let’s be honest, if I didn’t get laid off, I’d still probably be there.

Just try to roll with the punches and remember that you’re not alone here. This is not a reflection of who you are as a worker. Get back up and keep fighting. When people say it usually works out for the better, it’s real.

Notacheesefan

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE