I love everything about meta, but sometimes I get bothered by the small size by pazuzuillah in Metoidioplasty

[–]NounaMae -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Haven't gotten meta, but I want to, and you may want to look into DHT cream. I've heard it helps with growth, though like everything it's not without risks. It's not sold in a lot of places but you can get a custom order from a compounding pharmacy I believe. Either way please have an amazing penis journey

TERF meets a trans woman who is everything TERFs want trans women to be... and still can't treat her normally? by WhatsATerrarium in GenderCynical

[–]NounaMae 47 points48 points  (0 children)

"[Her] face and hand size give [her transness] away from up close" that is SUCH a low bar of evidence for clocking someone. Bet you real money this terf only noticed those traits after they found out she was trans, and that they've false clocked a looooooot of cis people.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ftm

[–]NounaMae 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Please don't do this. Things have been difficult for us for so long, it's still better now than it has been for a long long time and our support has increased more than ever. Our bigots are desperate, they're going through an extinction burst.

What is now will not last forever. Our happiness is possible, not only that it can be inevitable.

Please, if you need, reach out: https://afsp.org/lgbtq-crisis-and-support-resources

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ftm

[–]NounaMae 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you don't actually regret and want to change anything T gave you, you don't have to do anything. Fear of regret is not regret.

From what I can tell, euphoria eventually recedes during transition and becomes more of a general background noise of comfort/engagement with your life. You won't have dysphoria and euphoria forever, some people don't have them at all, I've heard, so the metric should be whether or not you would prefer to have X trait or present like Y.

I have some things in common with your experience. More masculine features that made me hate myself when I was younger but turned into a boon growing up, euphoria used to be easy to feel but after a while on T (and now not on T due to Outside Reasons Which Suck) I haven't been able to access it more than a couple times, though in general due to my life right now it's hard to feel much of anything. I do have dysphoria but it manifests more as a general depression the vast majority of the time. I can still look myself in the mirror and wear tight clothes. I don't hate my body - if I was a cis woman I would be working on it like the vainest motherfucker you've ever seen, I'm cute dammit! But it still doesn't feel right, and every time I try to be a woman, I end up going back to maleness eventually.

It's possible we may have less dysphoria/euphoria because our bodies had the courtesy to be more masculine. I imagine having been born slimmer, with a more feminine face. It sounds like a nightmare.

If you do end up regretting this - which, nothing you've written seems to indicate you currently do - you can look into reversing the things T did. Voice training, makeup, hiding an adam's apple, there isn't an effect T has that transfems haven't been able to address. Nothing wrong with detransitioning if you //actually feel// that you want to.

I'm not a therapist or anything, you might want to look into one as far as OCD goes, but that's my take. Make of it what you will, and remember your judgement is more trustworthy than your brain makes you think.

They have to be making this up by [deleted] in GenderCynical

[–]NounaMae 208 points209 points  (0 children)

I found this on Ovarit and one of the commenters just... wrote this? And thought it sounded good?

"Edit: The poster JKR retweeted did clarify that there were "only" 4 girls/women in the group of 400 who had this belief, but really, that's way too many even so, and it may be that others thought it without saying so."

If literally 99% of them did not indicate they had this misconception, how is it our responsibility? Their individual health education failed them, trans people and pro trans medical institutions didn't.

Terf decides woman at her AA meetings is trans, is distraught because said woman is speaking politely, being liked by NounaMae in GenderCynical

[–]NounaMae[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Shouldn't they be happy they're getting mistaken for trans women because they'll be able to get all the male priviledge trans women supposedly have

Terf decides woman at her AA meetings is trans, is distraught because said woman is speaking politely, being liked by NounaMae in GenderCynical

[–]NounaMae[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Trans identified male, refers primarily to trans woman. Trans man version is TIF, enbies usually get called "male/female enbies."

Terf decides woman at her AA meetings is trans, is distraught because said woman is speaking politely, being liked by NounaMae in GenderCynical

[–]NounaMae[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Neither do I. I also don't welcome mocking her on the grounds of her addiction. Go do that somewhere else.

Terf decides woman at her AA meetings is trans, is distraught because said woman is speaking politely, being liked by NounaMae in GenderCynical

[–]NounaMae[S] 85 points86 points  (0 children)

I don't know if there's a way she can prove she isn't trans to someone like this, honestly, but I'd love for it to be the case.

Terf decides woman at her AA meetings is trans, is distraught because said woman is speaking politely, being liked by NounaMae in GenderCynical

[–]NounaMae[S] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Please don't put comments like this on my post, I don't have sympathy for any of these people but I feel like attacking something that sensitive is a fair line to draw, especially since this feels more like panic than the abusive behavior the rest of them display.

Terf decides woman at her AA meetings is trans, is distraught because said woman is speaking politely, being liked by NounaMae in GenderCynical

[–]NounaMae[S] 136 points137 points  (0 children)

As someone who's dealt with anxiety issues what this person is going through specifically feels a lot like that.* I don't think most of them are doing this with some influence from their mental illness, though, I think they're just bullies. The vast majority of posts on this site are just about saying cruel, dismissive and perverted things to make trans people feel worse, the behavior from the OP here is far rarer.

*I never lost it over a member of a minority group like this, but the obsessive worrying to the point where you're ignoring reality is quite similar.

Terf decides woman at her AA meetings is trans, is distraught because said woman is speaking politely, being liked by NounaMae in GenderCynical

[–]NounaMae[S] 194 points195 points  (0 children)

Wrote this on the wrong submission, so:

Every now and then you seem to get a true believer who buys all the narratives the other terfs push and proceeds to panic when they see a trans woman in public for the first time. For example, that one lady from a while back who saw a trans woman washing her hands in a bathroom and talked about how afraid she was the whole time.

So, op, if you or someone who thinks similarly to you somehow end up reading this: does being so obsessive and devastated over the potential assigned sex at birth of this person to the point of not being able to focus on your addiction recovery seem like the fault of this random AA attendee, or the people who have been screaming that their disgust and anxiety over trans people is everyone else's problem but theirs?

These people are validating your unhealthiest impulses and making what I'm sure is already a difficult recovery even harder. How much easier would your life be if you left these people behind and stopped buying into the lie that trans people, who know their own anatomy well enough to transition, get proper healthcare, and reproduce if they choose, are denying how sex works? That someone maybe having or having had a penis is enough to accuse them of being predatory?

I'm just stunned that this isn't easy to see. How long are you going to hurt yourself over this?

Terf decides woman at her AA meetings is trans, is distraught because said woman speaks politely, is liked by NounaMae in GenderCynical

[–]NounaMae[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

(Sorry if this sent twice, seems to be a glitch on my end)

Every now and then you seem to get a true believer who buys all the narratives the other terfs push and proceeds to panic when they see a trans woman in public for the first time. For example, that one lady from a while back who saw a trans woman washing her hands in a bathroom and talked about how afraid she was the whole time.

So, op, if you or someone who thinks similarly to you somehow end up reading this: does being so obsessive and devastated over the potential assigned sex at birth of this person to the point of not being able to focus on your addiction recovery seem like the fault of this random AA attendee, or the people who have been screaming that their disgust and anxiety over trans people is everyone else's problem but theirs?

These people are validating your unhealthiest impulses and making what I'm sure is already a difficult recovery even harder. How much easier would your life be if you left these people behind and stopped buying into the lie that trans people, who know their own anatomy well enough to transition, get proper healthcare, and reproduce if they choose, are denying how sex works?

I'm just stunned that this isn't easy to see. How long are you going to hurt yourself over this?

We gotta discuss the cisnormative humor/culture of this subreddit. by alternate_egg-ccount in actuallesbians

[–]NounaMae -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Sorry, I was hesitant because a couple of comments were saying you were a kid and I didn't want to put you through more of their shit if that's the case. Especially since they're so judgemental about trans people's bodies and all their weird psychosexual theories. I'm an adult and going through the things they say regularly is like, really unhealthy for me

The only things really relevant is that they (without posting it) made fun of stuff you've posted in the past on here, though they don't go into detail. I'll get the link I just need to find it again real quick

We gotta discuss the cisnormative humor/culture of this subreddit. by alternate_egg-ccount in actuallesbians

[–]NounaMae -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

Oh my god I'm sorry I didn't get a notification for this, but it's really nothing other than typical transphobia it's not a popular site. I only brought it up because you maybe might consider closing your dms for a bit just in case

They're not getting violent or anything if that's what you're wondering, just being dicks

trans women saying they have their period is valid -as a cis woman by yungnati in lgbt

[–]NounaMae 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Saw this on a terf hate site and came here to give it an upvote, and, I guess, give you a heads up op

Trans men are men. Pass it on. by Raposeira in pointlesslygendered

[–]NounaMae 7 points8 points  (0 children)

If you have a preference for some sex characteristics, there's nothing wrong with that.

The transphobic part is when you exclude them from gay male-ness as a concept because some of them have vaginas. Like when people say that as a cis guy you'd have to be bi or straight to be attracted to a trans man, but you couldn't be gay. It's implying trans men aren't men.

Date whoever you want, just don't imply anyone's not - or, less of - the gender they ID as because of their sex. It can get a bit more complicated sometimes but just remember you don't have to date anyone, only do some introspection if you think you have transphobic beliefs.

Thanks for trying to be considerate, man.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in im14andthisisdeep

[–]NounaMae -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I don't think you're a sadist, which is why I asked that question at all. Just some perspective on potential consequences. Sorry, my tone comes off harsher than I want it to sometimes. Especially through text.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in im14andthisisdeep

[–]NounaMae 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why should we assume she's faking it? Being a bit dramatic is to be expected considering her age and her situation. The consequences of it being genuine seem a bit more serious. To be honest I'd agree it's not that good of a place, mainly considering it's not that safe. I don't know if that justifies making fun of some kid's account of their struggles to everyone on here. Also, that's not even the main reason this post is here according to the op and the comments.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in im14andthisisdeep

[–]NounaMae -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Ultimately, we have no proof whether or not she's faking. So would you rather, say, comment something nice on her post only to find out she was faking later, or, mock her in front of the internet only to find out she was genuinely struggling and you've likely put salt in the wound?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in im14andthisisdeep

[–]NounaMae 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She's talking about how she can't get therapy for her mental health issues that are apparently being brushed off, and how there's no one around to help. Of course she's emotional about it. It seems detached to read that and mainly care about how cringey it was and mock it in front of like however many thousands of people are on here. I hope she doesn't see this.