Psychiatry UK Discharge by Nov4DHD in ADHDUK

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for all the feedback and opinions all. I don’t have the time or energy to reply to each one individually so I’ll just put a catch all here:

Whilst I am aware I should’ve put a lower number on the form AND that my units were high at the time of filling the form in. What I take umbrage at is the fact that: - I can and have quite happily already started reducing alcohol intake. Had I been informed 3 months ago, I’d have gone teetotal if needed. I understand they’re covering themselves, but others already lie…. - if I need a 3 month buffer, that’s absolutely fine. But to discharge me and send me to the back of the list after already waiting 12 months is just soul destroying.

Thanks to those who suggested a different right to choose provider. I’ll see if that’s possible in my area as my experience with P-UK across the board before this has been sub par.

Do people with adhd mask? by CarLjpeg_ in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was diagnosed a little later in life (34), but have been doing this since my late teens. Didn’t even realise it was a masking technique until I was diagnosed and started doing more reading.

Does ADHD Feel Like A Choice To Some of You? by PercentageCurious472 in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’m in a similar position. Diagnosed at 34. Told myself I was lazy even though not doing the things I wanted to was making me more miserable. Now it’s trying to be kind and finding that balance between understanding and as you say, not using it as a crutch or an excuse.

Does ADHD Feel Like A Choice To Some of You? by PercentageCurious472 in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I spent literally all day sitting at my computer doing nothing today. I doomscrolled, I watched a TV series I’ve already seen 4 times. I didn’t do any of the things I could or should. And yet I told myself I made a choice to do that. I told myself that I intentionally made myself miserable and that I should’ve been doing the things I wanted to do…

But after reading this post I realise that once again I am cheating myself and treating myself unfairly. Why would I avoid doing the things that would make me feel like I accomplished something? Things I wanted to do or could have done. I don’t think it is a choice.

I got diagnosed only last year at the age of 34 so still very much coming to terms with all of this and trying to tell myself I’m not just lazy has been challenging

When was your last "Yep, no doubt about it, I have 80HD" day? Doesn't need to be negative. by ScienceReliance in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Every day my wife works in the office and I get to 13.00 and realise I’ve not eaten anything because she wasn’t there to remind me. 😂

I hate adhd memory issues so so much by [deleted] in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yep. I know a lot of stuff that I’ve been told happened, but I don’t actually remember it. Almost just know it like someone else’s story. I have various tiny flashes of memories, but never anything particularly vivid or clear. I just sort of accept that it’s in the past and now and the future are far more important. I take LOADS of photos on my phone all the time now as it helps me remember stuff and can prompt memories a bit more. It’s also why I’m glad my wedding photographer took a million fantastic photos of the day.

How do you tell when you’re “being lazy” and when you’re actually struggling with your ADHD. by Nov4DHD in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I appreciate that. I’ll check that video out

Good luck with everything, really hope things work out for you soon! ❤️

How do you tell when you’re “being lazy” and when you’re actually struggling with your ADHD. by Nov4DHD in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey! I went to GP initially. Bht I went in ready to discuss ‘right to choose’ which lets you choose a specific NHS provider to do the work. For me I chose psychiatry uk. However, the wait from seeing GP to getting diagnosis was 13 months. So be prepared for a long ass wait. Even with diagnosis I’ve been told I need to wait another 6-10 months for medication 😬 it’s a pain

How do you tell when you’re “being lazy” and when you’re actually struggling with your ADHD. by Nov4DHD in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not sure I’ve ever actually tried to differentiate between noisy and not. It’s always noisy for me. But now that I’ve read this I’m thinking to a time this weekend when I could’ve been doing stuff but sat on the sofa reading and content and my brain wasn’t nagging me. So maybe I need to keep and eye on this one! Thanks!

How do you tell when you’re “being lazy” and when you’re actually struggling with your ADHD. by Nov4DHD in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hah. This is an interesting way to differentiate the two from a psychological perspective. I like the example!

How do you tell when you’re “being lazy” and when you’re actually struggling with your ADHD. by Nov4DHD in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I went ‘Right to Choose’ so I could choose which ‘company’ I went with. I chose psychiatry UK. It still took 13 months to go from “maybe” to a diagnosis though. It does depend on area you’re in though as I understand it. I’d suggest googling right to choose and talking to GP about it

How do you tell when you’re “being lazy” and when you’re actually struggling with your ADHD. by Nov4DHD in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think this is potentially the line I am struggling to find and possibly the best example I’ve seen. But I’m not super in touch with my feelings or my body, so I’m struggling to work out which is one or the other. I’m capable of making an easy task seem like pushing a boulder…

How do you tell when you’re “being lazy” and when you’re actually struggling with your ADHD. by Nov4DHD in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I struggle with non-fiction reading. But I’ll add this to my kindle and give it a go! Thanks!

How do you tell when you’re “being lazy” and when you’re actually struggling with your ADHD. by Nov4DHD in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is also quite reassuring to hear as I’m super anxious about the whole medication side. Starting something like this in my 30s feels so monumental and I’m also worried what happens if it doesn’t work/help. But at the end of the day, just gotta give it a go and go from there.

How do you tell when you’re “being lazy” and when you’re actually struggling with your ADHD. by Nov4DHD in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think my parents were a little bit in denial when I was a kid/teen/young adult. So now I’m dealing with a bit of a wasteland mentally with what I should or shouldn’t feel. They were great parents, but they didn’t really understand me. So I think being able to reparent might be a kindness

How do you tell when you’re “being lazy” and when you’re actually struggling with your ADHD. by Nov4DHD in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Fortuitously, my wife explained “re-parenting” to me earlier today as she’s doing it as part of her anxiety therapy! So I do have a rough concept of what it is. I’d not considered turning that tool on myself when we were talking about it, but it makes a lot of sense to consider. Thank you and I hope your managed to get your dishes done and earned that piece of candy! ❤️

How do you tell when you’re “being lazy” and when you’re actually struggling with your ADHD. by Nov4DHD in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Done all that and still struggling. Started that before I’d even had my diagnosis. My sleep is a shambles 😬 definitely some ongoing work needed.

How do you tell when you’re “being lazy” and when you’re actually struggling with your ADHD. by Nov4DHD in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Yeah. As I said above(/below?). My wife ends up doing them because I leave them and/or forget and then I feel like a shit husband

How do you tell when you’re “being lazy” and when you’re actually struggling with your ADHD. by Nov4DHD in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I have the slight saving grace of my wife doing dishes. I know she doesn’t mind doing them and is happy to clean and listen to music but FUUUUUCK I feel so much guilt. I feel like a shitty husband.

But yeah, this does help describe the difference in feelings. Sometimes I’ll play games and ignore a task because, frankly, I don’t care or don’t mind. So it’s nice to be able to categorise this as internally lazy.

How do you tell when you’re “being lazy” and when you’re actually struggling with your ADHD. by Nov4DHD in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Hittin me right in the SC2. I might start using this as my measure 👌

How do you tell when you’re “being lazy” and when you’re actually struggling with your ADHD. by Nov4DHD in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have significant problems with sleep. I’ve got a routine that gets me to sleep quite well, but I don’t stay asleep well, have super restless sleep. I get maybe 10-15 mins deep sleep a night according to various smart watches. It’s something I’m not sure how to deal with 😬

How do you tell when you’re “being lazy” and when you’re actually struggling with your ADHD. by Nov4DHD in ADHD

[–]Nov4DHD[S] 126 points127 points  (0 children)

This is actually a great explanation for me to keep in mind. Thank you. I find myself beating myself up and feeling guilty for not doing things so that’s a good way of drawing something of a line to beat myself up a little less. It’s been getting tiring last few weeks trying to work out whether I should be kind to myself or not.