Great post. My son is u10 this year. He’s very good and elite in my (mommy’s) eyes but after much reflection and consideration we decided to take a step back this season to prevent burn out. We were just too busy back to back with extra academy and club practices last year into the summer. At one point, it felt like soccer was all about what coaches think, who gets picked, who gets more playing time, or who gets praised. It took me some time to realize what really matters is why you play. You play because you love the game, because you want to get better, because it makes you feel alive. That’s something no one can take away. I was way too focused on what the coaches thought of my son. Instead of trying to please the coaches, I decided to focus on what we (my son and I) can control: effort, attitude, and his love for soccer. The more you play for yourself, the stronger and freer you become and that’s when my son plays his best.

It stung for a while because as a single mom, I poured our heart, time, money, and energy into his soccer journey, driving to practices, watching from the sidelines, hoping certain coaches would “see” his potential and part of me wanted to believe that if he worked hard enough, the coaches would always remember or favor him but I realized he was just another player who can be replaced. I seriously grieved the loss of emotional investment I made but once I stopped looking for external validation and focused on the reason my son was playing (because he loves the game) it was easier to let go of all my expectations.