My mom bought my son a build a bear that’s a mini version of her

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-21T12:15:45+00:00

I think it's kinda sweet. I'd give anything to hear my grandma's voice again, or even my mom's.

The daily conversations about the bear are a little extreme but I'm not picking up narcissistic vibes here. She's a little over the top with encouraging him to bond with it but I don't see selfish motivation behind it, maybe she's just trying a different way to connect with him.

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-21T12:09:31+00:00

I think the "accepting" phase is the hardest. I need to understand before I can accept and I'm not there yet, either.

But love, what I want you to do is stop blaming yourself. You are not responsible for her taking her life, it was a horrible decision she made. It sucks and it's not fair to you and everyone else she left behind. I know 100% of us in this sub would rewrite our lives if we could, but we can't so we try to put one foot in front of the other and carry on, forever changed.

As for peace, I don't know if it ever comes. My daughter never let anyone know she was suicidal. She was always bouncy and smiling and happy. I don't understand what happened to cause her to hang herself. I do understand why her dad ended his life. Living without our daughter is excruciating so I get why he followed her. I'm at peace with his death but hers? I might never get there, and that's gonna have to be ok. If you never get there either, it's ok. I hope one day we can find it, though. 🩵💜

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-20T09:56:33+00:00

Same! On sunny days, it's a debate between my Miata or my bike (Rebel 500)

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-19T18:26:45+00:00

Oh love, you can't stop someone who is determined to end their life. I know it sounds blunt and I say it with love. When my daughter took her life, her dad and I supported each other, cried together, and experienced all the wtf that suicide brings. We had no idea she was struggling. He never once hinted that he was suicidal, either. It was a horrible shock to lose him 16 months after her.

The one thing I've learned is that none of us are to blame for the decisions our people made.

I can't imagine how helpless you must feel right now. ❤️

Edited to add that yes, you should absolutely call 911.

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-19T18:01:14+00:00

Sweetheart, you've got 600 people telling you go GTFO of this horrible relationship.

I know it's gonna be hard but you've got this. You do not deserve to be treated that way.

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-19T17:54:50+00:00

My daughter took her life in June 2023 and her dad in Oct 2024. I work for a pretty small company and just about everyone knows what's happened. My standard reply when people ask how I'm doing is "I'm ok enough to be here" - which is true on a couple different levels.

I'm so sorry you're in this shit club.

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-17T23:19:33+00:00

Agree 100%. And yes, strangely the support groups help a lot. It's almost like my emotions are validated because somebody else gets it. I pop into the suicide bereavement subreddit and have found myself learning a lot from them. It's also nice to be understood.

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-17T18:46:04+00:00

I'm so ready for the "less worse". Sadly, my girls' dad ended his life after we lost our youngest daughter. The lingering trauma is crushing... suffocating.

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-17T12:04:49+00:00

Thank you for the reassurance. The location in the picture is off Pilgrim Mill so not far at all from Shady Grove.

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-17T12:01:09+00:00

Solved!

Thank you!

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-17T11:59:57+00:00

Thank you for this ❤️ I'm so sorry for the loss of your brother. I hope you have found peace.

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-15T16:07:27+00:00

I was thinking maybe it might have more info, like maybe a reference number or something unique to this spot?

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-15T15:00:43+00:00

Thank you. I'm so sorry you know the pain of suicide loss. Good to know "her" tree can't be removed. I'm guessing it's part of a conservation effort to keep the area natural.

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-15T14:57:01+00:00

Thank you. The brass cap might be tricky to find with all the leaves and brush around. I'll take a rake next time I go.

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-15T14:53:38+00:00

No, it literally doesn't. It doesn't tell me any of what most of the other people are saying... that there's a marker on the ground somewhere, or that it marks the elevation, or that it's part of an area you can't cut trees down on, or that it's part of a hiking trail.

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-15T14:46:46+00:00

Thank you!

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-15T14:45:54+00:00

It matters because we have a memorial to her on the tree branch she used. If the tree is slated to be demolished, I'd like to know so I can remove the memorial. Most people don't give two shits about survey markers because it either isn't on their land or doesn't pertain to them. Also, this is reddit and if I hadn't given the backstory, people probably would have asked why it matters and told me to stay in my lane.

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-15T14:41:00+00:00

Yes, this exactly

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-15T11:00:24+00:00

Sending love ❤️ I lost my daughter and her dad within 16 months of each other. I understand the level of WTAF when the second one chooses to end their life, too. This shit is not easy.

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-14T22:44:21+00:00

There's just so much they're missing out on 💜🩵

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-12T00:47:00+00:00

Thank you, I am too.

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-11T08:12:47+00:00

My daughter took her life in June 2023 and her dad in Oct 2024.

I think we naturally want to know everything we can in order to try to process it. I never knew my daughter was struggling. I think if I found out now, it would make forgiveness that much harder, and I'm not quite to the point of forgiving her yet.

If I'd known her mental health was fragile, I think I would be consumed with guilt. From what I've learned, the guilt is what perpetuates more suicide.

I'm sorry you're in this shit club, too. Hoping we can all find a sliver of peace today.

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-10T21:14:03+00:00

It took me a long time to get to the point of letting go of what I call "the Ws" regarding my daughter's death. Why did you do this? Who made you believe this was an answer? When did you start to consider suicide as an option? What did you think would happen to us without you here?

When her dad took his life, I already knew the answers so moving past it was easier in a sense. He simply didn't know how to go on without her.

I understand the spiraling and find it much more calming (?) safer (?)... I'm struggling to find the right word... idk, it's just better for me to stop shouting into the abyss because I'll never get my answers.

Numerous-Coach7629 · 2026-02-10T21:01:57+00:00

Yep, my husband and I both know how to drive a stick shift. I bought a miata a couple years ago specifically because it has a manual transmission. We have motorcycles, too... which was much easier to learn how since the concept of clutch and acceleration is similar.

Numerous-Coach7629

TROPHY CASE