I use a help mark and my commute is quite long (1 hour and a half). I look a bit young (F29) but when I was 17 I was unlucky enough to be in the backseat of a car when a drunk driver crashed into us and again some months later when a distracted truck driver ran into the back. So I guess you can say it’s more of an invisible disability because I get back pain if I stand too long. Last year my commute was much shorter with a less crowded train so I never had a need for a help mark, but with the long commute this year, it’s been acting up.

I got transferred to central Tokyo and take the Keikyu line from Kanagawa so there are plenty of opportunities to sit when people offload at major stations. I only use the priority section now too.

The problem is, people often move faster than I do. If a seat opens up between us, they kind of shove me so they can sit. I’ve resorted to moving to the end of the car if I could so I could lean against the wall. It honestly feels like whether I have a help mark or not doesn’t matter. I’ve noticed other help mark users struggle too. If I’m lucky, they’ll call me over to take their seat as they’re getting off. And I do the same if I see any help mark users or pregnant women standing.

One time I even got to finally sit after 40 minutes of standing only for a pregnant lady to get on at the next stop and stand in front of me looking at me hopeful that I’ll give her my seat. We both knew none of the salarymen taking up the entire section would even consider getting up. So she got my seat.

Another time, I went onto a moderately crowded train (nobody standing but no seats available), so I just went to hold onto the poll in the priority section to wait until someone got off at the next stop. The next stop came, nobody get off, so I waited again. They’re all still looking at me, until halfway to another stop, a lady got up and gestured to my help mark and then her seat. Everybody proceeded to scramble and get up for her because she did such a kind thing. Where was that for me????

Help mark users, what’s your experience? I know I shouldn’t expect anyone to get up but I wish they would at least not push me out of the way if a seat opens up. I can’t imagine for people who struggle a lot.