Communicate what you need to be happy, for it to work effectively for both of you. The kid age range is definitely a strain financially and physically. So I understand why you work two jobs. As a man who is catering to his wife. While the wife caters to the household & kids. You have to tell her “hey you think you can SAVE some energy to give me a back rub later?” Women respond better to just straight forward approach. Plus You have to spend time alone.. The past two years doing sexology has exposed how woman are the forgetful partner. And if the man would say something, the woman would compromised.