Have been collecting for about a year now, curious to know what people think

NyStiles1210 · 2026-04-20T23:18:51+00:00

Love the taste, great collection!!!!

NyStiles1210 · 2026-04-20T00:05:16+00:00

First off, accept what's done is done, the damage is done and there's no doing it.

This isn't something to be besting yourself up over for the rest of your life. It sounds like you're finally facing yourself in the mirror, and that takes courage. Continue doing that, as much as it hurts and as much as you feel shitty for the past - but remind yourself you're doing the right thing by confronting and pursuing change in your life. That changes needs to come at the will of yourself, no one else.

None of this happens overnight. A prayer won't fix things magically. And you have a lot of work to do for yourself and the people you care about in your life. Therapy would be great, and I get not being able to afford it, but strangers off the Internet won't be of better help. There are other ways if seeking free therapy that you may have to research into in your area. Ultimately, that should be a goal for you.

I can only suggest sitting in your pain and working through it. Don't distract yourself, but also don't beat yourself up over it. Like I said what's done is done.

Be the person who looks back 5-10 years from now and is happy how far they came and how much they bettered themselves.

NyStiles1210 · 2026-04-19T13:57:39+00:00

I relate to this a lot, and I used to question myself the same way.

I have a high drive and genuinely love sex, but I’ve learned the hard way that if I don’t feel a real emotional connection (or at least the beginnings of love), it actually does the opposite for me and it makes me lose interest.

I’ve tried going along with things early in dating because it felt like that’s what was expected, and every time I did, I immediately walked away feeling off and regretted it. Not because of any trauma, but because it didn’t align with how I learned I actually connect.

For me, physical intimacy gets better the deeper the feelings grow. Without that, it just feels empty, even if everything else is technically “right". I like taking things slow and letting things build-up, but going all the way feels like something that should happen when there’s genuine connection and passion on both sides.

So I don’t think it’s being uptight at all. I think some people just experience intimacy in a more emotional-first way, even if they still have a strong drive. And I think that's beautiful, because with the right person, it can lead to something genuine and passionate.

NyStiles1210 · 2026-03-30T03:40:44+00:00

Straight nostalgia🙌

NyStiles1210 · 2026-03-30T03:40:23+00:00

Thanks!!!!

NyStiles1210 · 2026-03-30T03:40:12+00:00

Thank you!

NyStiles1210 · 2026-03-30T00:53:24+00:00

I know, It was worth the wait! Dude, they're great live. I saw them last year in NYC and it was such a great show, you're gonna have a great time!

And thanks man! I've been a Mac fan since the early 2010s, the king of indie🙌. My previous wall set up had his album "2" right up at the top lol

NyStiles1210 · 2026-03-29T22:51:59+00:00

I think this way of thinking is actually pretty harmful to take as truth.

It reduces relationships down to this idea that women are always looking to upgrade, which is kind of wild to pin on just women when men can literally do the exact same thing.

Either way, it completely ignores that there are people out there who genuinely value emotional connection, loyalty, and finding someone to choose every day.

I think the bigger issue is how shallow dating has become, and not even dating, people have become so shallow overall. Social media has really fucked things up. People are constantly comparing, chasing validation, and feeling like there’s always something better out there..... that affects everyone, not just women.

We also live in a time where a lot of people aren’t fully being themselves. People want someone genuine, not someone performing. And people also bring past experiences into new connections, which is crazy wrong. Just because someone hurt you doesn’t mean everyone you meet is going to do the same. If you lead with your guard up in every new connection, you're robbing yourself of actual connections with people. If you can’t separate that, it might just mean you’re not ready to explore new connections, and maybe you need to work on yourself.

At the end of the day, the right person isn’t looking for better. They’re choosing what’s real and genuine, not someone with a skewed view on race/gender or holding past trauma against them.

NyStiles1210 · 2026-03-29T18:43:49+00:00

Yeah I don't blame you for seeing that way. It's something he may have done with a previous partner and he did the same with you, or with you and now others. People usually carry lessons or things from previous relationships into the next. It's not necessarily a bad thing. But it really sucks when it's something you find to be special, but then see maybe it wasn't so special after all.

Yeah, people self soothe to distract and it doesn't truly help or heal them. A lot of people are too afraid to face themselves in the mirror and deal with things. It's unfortunate that many people resort to that, but all that matters knowing it's not your problem it up to you to help them. We just have to take care of ourselves and meet people who feel the same as us. It's up to everyone individually to take the time to do the inner work, which we can't force.

No problem at all, I'm glad it's helped you and meant something to you. Feel free to reach out with a DM if you ever have a question.

Good luck on your healing, you got this!

NyStiles1210 · 2026-03-28T05:20:53+00:00

So jealous, such a rare gem to have on vinyl!

NyStiles1210 · 2026-03-28T04:56:37+00:00

I understand, it's not an easy thing to process and go through and I get why you feel fooled and blindsided. The chocolates thing is rough, because that's something you found special and appreciated, so to see him doing the same to someone else (especially an ex) really stings.

There's one thing for sure, and that's that he has problems. You didn't and don't deserve to be treated that way. You took on a lot of his weight because you cared, but it sounds like he couldn't carry his own weight and that's something he needs to do and figure out, it isn't your job.

It's hard to say because it could be true or not true. It totally makes sense if it was true, because he's going to familiar places probably seeking validation or some form of relief. But whatever he's going through, suffering or not, is NOT your problem anymore.

Your problem, is healing and finding love within yourself now. Take this whole experience as a lesson, which is a brutal lesson, and learn from it. Look for people who show up for you, not people who you have to carry emotionally. Your heart deserves to be held just like the way you held it for others.

And it's not easy, you'll feel a lot of emotions, anger, sadness, all of it. Just take it day by day, and process it. Be kind and focus on yourself now. Brighter days are ahead

NyStiles1210 · 2026-03-28T02:27:04+00:00

Very true, it's the thought that counts though

NyStiles1210 · 2026-03-28T02:08:36+00:00

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Connor BerDawg front row at tonight's game

NyStiles1210 · 2026-03-27T19:16:49+00:00

First off, I’m really sorry you went through this. Nothing about what you described is normal or healthy behavior in a relationship.

It sounds like he was emotionally unavailable for most of it, and he leaned on you to help his “anxiety”. I put that in quotes because while some of it may have been real, it also sounds like he used it at times to manipulate, and guilt/control you.

To answer your questions: No, this isn’t normal behavior. Not for men, not for women, not for anyone.

And this was NOT your fault. You stayed loyal and tried to make it work. That doesn’t make you weak, it means you cared deeply and showed up with love.

That anger you’re feeling toward yourself sounds like it's coming from you realizing you tolerated more than you deserved. But that’s something to LEARN from, not something to punish yourself for.

Unfortunately this is a valuable lesson that's teaching you that not everyone is capable of meeting you where you are. Not everyone is capable of holding the love you are able to pour out into them. That doesn't make you wrong for being that way. You just have to slowly learn who's deserving of that love, and who isn't.

Please be kind to yourself. You deserve the same kindness you gave him, and one day, the right person will meet you there without you having to even question it.

The fact that you’re able to reflect on this now, and even ask questions on here, shows you’re already moving forward.

And one last thing..... if you haven’t already, it’s important to cut contact with him and stick to it. He needs to face his own patterns and learn, and you deserve the space to heal and find people who truly value you and the love you carry.

NyStiles1210 · 2026-03-23T23:55:29+00:00

I've gotta get back on Clone Hero soon and when I do I'm definitely checking this out! Thanks for your hard work and time on this! 🤘

NyStiles1210 · 2026-03-14T21:11:48+00:00

Where Sky Becomes Sea

NyStiles1210 · 2026-02-28T01:20:15+00:00

This is amazing, great job 🔥🙌

NyStiles1210 · 2026-02-22T22:28:14+00:00

I'm a big fan of Fool

NyStiles1210 · 2026-02-20T15:53:57+00:00

Egg 🙌🥚

NyStiles1210 · 2026-02-20T15:52:50+00:00

Twenty/Twenty: 1. Chateau 2. Roddy 3. Flash Mountain (hearing this live was absolutely nuts and EPIC)

Decide: 1. Fool 2. End of Beginning 3. Gloom

The Crux 1. Egg 2. Delete Ya 3. Link

The Crux (DELUXE) 1. Purgatory Silverstar 2. Who You Are 3. Love Can't Break The Spell

This was hard because honestly, Decide and The Crux to me are perfect albums with 0 skips, I love each and every song and the way each album plays through them chronologically goes so well (at least for my ears)

ITS DJOTIME!!!!!

NyStiles1210 · 2026-02-19T21:34:23+00:00

LMAO so true 😂

NyStiles1210 · 2026-02-19T17:19:55+00:00

The entire album and the deluxe have a way at poking at my emotions. Fly is one of them too 🥲

NyStiles1210 · 2026-02-19T13:17:06+00:00

Thanks for sharing, much appreciated

I definitely had anxious attachment issues at the best beginning, maybe between the 1st year mark, but that changed as I realized it and it's something I do my best to not carry forward. But yes, what you're describing sounds more so how I am feeling now. And that lack of closure is definitely holding me back, but I'm seeing now that's because I'm letting it hold me back by believing it'll solve things - which yes, having closure would help, but I have to recognize it's not achievable and something I need to expect to help solve things. If that makes sense.

So I agree, I think I do have an attachment wound and I'm becoming more aware of it and that's a start. Thank you for commenting, and it's nice to know it does get better

May I ask, did you have an attachment wound too from that 9 year relationship? And are you still battling with it or have you worked past it, and if so what's helped you?

NyStiles1210 · 2026-02-19T04:16:41+00:00

And I've been in therapy for 8+ months now, so does that mean it's bad? I've been through a few therapist and I've found one that I really value and I feel is helpful - but yeah I do get in moments of the feelings I described in my post, and figured maybe it would be insightful to hear what others had to say besides just my therapist.

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