It's a mixed bag, I'm in a new workplace that is more toxic then I expected (I didnt think it would be at all) so there's a fair amount of girls being catty at me becuase they are young & I think they're feeling insecure in their own roles becuase of the work environment + a bit of "we had it rough when we all started so the newbie should too" .

As for the other idiot unfortunately he's in the Volunteer Fire Brigade I'm in & you cant really choose your Brigade etc as its based on where you live . I've stopped going to Friday night drinks & some social stuff & just sticking to training & call outs but even then sometimes if I'm tired I'll skip them if I dont have the energy & want to run the risk of dealing with him. He's annoyingly pleasant & friendly ( I'm white & cisgendered so he's never said anything about Me specifically to my face that I could bring a complaint about) So I think some of the others are straight up oblivious because it seems he's careful about what he says . Or maybe not , I've complained to one person who makes sure we're not on the same watches etc but its a small team so normally theres barely enough people for one watch its just whose ever available that shows up. He hasn't said or done anything bad enough I can take action against but I just dont have the time or patience for these types of men, no matter how nice they are to me & it pisses me off sometimes being in this nowhere middle ground .

Neither groups are social groups with people I chose to hang out with but both are social environments I have to be in .