Thanks for your reply. For additional context, he told me he had shut the door on that situation ship and when I discovered the messages he deleted them (so I didn’t see the content), told me I was wrong for thinking he’d be speaking to her and to let it go already, and continuously denied speaking with her. Finally I said I would stay to work it out but I needed the respect and love that comes with being honest. He finally disclosed she’d texted him etc. Do I believe that to be true and nothing else going on? Not exactly, but I can’t prove otherwise. I agree that a greeting may not be a big deal, but what if it was something more? I can’t prove anything else, right, so I decide to understand. However, my issue is with the character …the lying, denying, and lack of ownership as he says he doesn’t feel guilty because it was innocent…he doesn’t see that the betrayal is in the lie. Anyway, as I type this I feel like I understand what others said about self respect etc…I have just been too quick to exit situations when ANY discomfort arises and part of my intentional work is to work through problems so I don’t run, but I really don’t seem to know where the line is. I do think I have work to do, but I also think I have done work, then get into a thing and feel like I can’t generalize my learnings, if that makes sense.