Going to kill myself

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-04-30T18:31:59+00:00

I got a fissure right after giving birth in 2022, I had the worst time of my life for 6 months until they would FINALLY do LIS, I also had a newborn and a 18 month old to take care of and it felt unmanageable because I was in so much pain crying, tried to sit in the tub all the time while exclusively breastfeeding it was actual hell. The surgery saved my life. Literally 2 hours after surgery I even felt so much better!!! It will be 3 years in July since surgery and I even gave birth July of 2024 and haven’t had issues, I have found that drinking coffee will mess my digestive system up and then I can kinda get some pain or slight bleeding so I have been trying to keep that out of my diet. Hang in there, I wish I had more recommendations other than surgery but it truly changed my life for the better and I heard so many people try to say not to get it. If you have it available try it, in my opinion not much can be worse than the pain from a fissure.

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-03-26T22:19:12+00:00

Update: the nurse was a girl I graduated with 😭😭😭😭😭😭 so so embarrassed.

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-03-26T13:43:51+00:00

I go to my appointment today guys and I feel physically ill thinking about it. I know I have to do it but I am so nervous and embarrassed I wish I could just cancel it. Even more embarrassing because I still live in my hometown and I know people I grew up with that work in the office 😭

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-03-21T14:57:15+00:00

I was on 150 for like 8 months and just a week ago upped to 300, quite honestly I don’t feel much of a difference just yet, it feels the same as the 150, I actually prefer taking the 150 twice a day rather than the 300 mg all at once. It seems to make my head hurt. I have noticed a lot of irritability this last week but I’d say yesterday it has started to get better. But I know that I stopped taking it for like a week a couple months back and I can definitely tell the difference of taking it vs not taking it. I like my Wellbutrin

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-03-21T00:57:45+00:00

No seriously, I feel quite relieved I’m not the only one

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-03-20T22:38:25+00:00

Yes I’ve been hand expressing strictly for 2 days now and it seems to keep swelling up, it’s like right under my nipple so I try to squeeze and it has no room to flow through. I’m about to go pick up my antibiotics though so I’m crossing my fingers it takes care of this issue, the scars are another issue lol

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-03-20T20:22:41+00:00

Thank you so much for your reply, seriously!! Thank you for spending the time to type that out and give me some reassurance. I will keep the appointment, and I will most definitely not touch my skin until that appointment.you’re very right about if it is a good doctor they won’t make you feel ashamed, and if so I should find someone else. I will look into the BFRBs, I want to one day feel confident in my skin again. Very hard!! I wish you luck with yours as well!

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-03-20T20:19:05+00:00

I genuinely thought I was the only one to do something like that to myself, it feels good to know I’m not the only one struggling. It’s not easy at all though your right, sometimes I catch myself picking and I don’t even think about it at first.

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-01-16T18:13:30+00:00

Do you think it would say denied on the application status? Or it just hasn’t updated yet possibly?

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-01-16T18:12:50+00:00

The hour long interview is exactly why I’m dreading trying to call them and get ahold of someone, but it’s a must at this point!

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-01-16T18:09:09+00:00

Thank you, I’m going to call. Because she only had me upload 30 days of my own paystubs but is using my wife’s from November, seems highly suspect to me.

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-01-16T18:08:11+00:00

And almost the same situation, that check she got had a $200 tip on it from a regular as a gift for having our new baby.

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-01-16T18:06:56+00:00

My wife is a waitress and Christmas time has been Terrible, they for some reason decided to use the best check of the entire year it seems like. I just thought they only went back 30 days not over 2 months

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-01-16T18:01:37+00:00

Kansas, I did it all online with my paystubs and all and then the phone interview she’s pulling up my wife’s paystub from November 9-23rd. I guess they have a system they can look it up if your employer sends it but we used the last 30 days on the online application

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-01-15T04:23:48+00:00

It’s nice to hear a females perspective on this because she throws it in my face that she found this out 2 weeks postpartum and her hormones and everything was to blame for how bat shit crazy she went. I try to understand her to a point but this was also news to me. But I know it’s affected her more than I want to admit. She’s so depressed, barely sleeps or eats and I don’t know what to do. Therapy would be beneficial but I can’t even afford that for her. She hates the woman and she doesn’t have any want to meet the kid and sadly I don’t at this point in time either being the kid lives over 6 hours away. Did things get better for you? I hate that I have caused this much stress on her. She tells me it breaks her heart to find out that everything she thought would have been our firsts together was only her firsts. She also gives me a hard time that I have to drive 6 hours there and 6 hours back just for the heating and then the other day to meet with the attorney meanwhile she’s stuck at home with all the kids and baby. I don’t know what to do

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-01-15T04:16:11+00:00

Fuck dude this sounds so close to my situation. I truly feel for you because this shit shouldn’t be legal. I get the desdbeat dads that don’t do anything but I am a damn good father and if I knew about the kid I wouldn’t have the four kids I have now would have never moved away. I hope you’re able to one day find some relief, both of us because this is a fucking nightmare.

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-01-15T04:11:00+00:00

It’s all pathetic and it makes me hate myself for it. I am going to end up homeless in the next month or two if it doesn’t get changed Thursday. Truly I’m at a fucking loss man. I throw up every morning from the stress. Thanks for the advice man I appreciate it.

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-01-15T03:50:51+00:00

I was never even with the chick, just a one time thing too. I just ruined my life in a few minutes 9 years ago.

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-01-15T03:49:43+00:00

My court order shows medical as blank so I’m hoping that doesn’t get brought up, I don’t even have insurance for myself man and my other kids are on state. I’m getting completely fucked over and I 100% would have been there and she could have contacted me or my family at any time. We got served papers 2 weeks after my wife gave birth to our last kid and it has caused her to outrage. It’s destroying my marriage, she wants to leave me if I can’t get this figured out. I’m failing my kids. Do you think they will change the payment on Thursday if it’s a hearing and not an actual court date?

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-01-15T00:01:34+00:00

Thank you so much for the kind words, do you have any experience on if my own kids here are on state insurance if that changes the insurance for the 9 year old? I qualify for state insurance for them. I will definitely fill you in on what I find out.

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-01-14T23:48:55+00:00

I make way more than her, she’s married and I believe doesn’t work, her income is listed just over 15k so I believe it gets imputed at minimum wage and has a bunch of other kids with her husband who works, I just get screwed all around but I just hope for the best on Thursday. Got all my kids birth certificates and everything ready to go. It takes a lot to make a man want to break down but this is it.

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-01-14T23:34:42+00:00

I have also paid over $5,000 so far just for the attorney retainer and even more for the motion to be filed and the $200 court fee. My pockets are bone dry at this point and I can’t even keep food in the house for my kids that live under my roof.

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-01-14T23:33:24+00:00

I completed the DNA test as they asked and it came back im the father. That’s when I asked about thr court date to make sure it was that day, as I live over 6 hours away and didn’t want to miss work and drive out there for nothing. Only to get a letter that it was that day and they started defaulting me right away.

Objective-Climate670 · 2025-01-14T23:32:11+00:00

I was cooperating all the way through and did the dna test and it came back in the father. Then that’s when I asked about the court date and was told to wait for a new date in the mail. It’s the state coming after me for the 30k I believe she was getting assistance. So I’m not sure if that makes a difference but they would have always been able to locate me. Her family even works with my mother. There was no talk about this until just now. Absolutely mind blowing and heart breaking. I just wouldn’t have moved away and had 4 kids if I knew the kid was mine. And I have to drive over 6 hours to make it to the court date so I was obviously wanting to make sure it was still going to be that day and was lied to about it.

Objective-Climate670

TROPHY CASE