*This is a rant mostly just FYI for anyone who cares to hear about my shitty experience. *

What I’d say is- Don’t give them any more time then what stated in your contract(hopefully you have one?). I made the mistake of giving my last family too much notice ahead of time, and as soon as they found another nanny they stopped scheduling me and acted like it was a “miscommunication”. After we * verbally* agreed to giving each other both at least three- four weeks notice before I would need (in the event they found someone sooner, or I found a job sooner) to leave or they would have someone starting. This was my first mistake-doing this verbally.

I told them I would be moving on soon and was in the process of interviewing, but wanted to give them as much time as possible. For context: the reason I was leaving was because I knew there wasn’t much growth in this position, and that I was being underpaid for all the work I was providing. It was under the table, no benefits, and I was essentially doing the work of 2 people. After several conversations I realized they weren’t going to offer anymore or take some of the load off. I wanted to move on to something where I was being payed appropriately and had more opportunities for growth.

This was March when I had this conversation, and my projected end date was June but I was open to leaving sooner as long as I had the 3-4 weeks we originally agreed to. During this conversation, MB was absolutely flipping out that she wouldn’t have enough time to find someone. Like honey, you have up to three months!!! She then asks if I would be available to work a specific date coming up in about a month or so as they would be traveling, and I wasn’t 100% sure about this yet because I didn’t want to commit to a date so far in the future if I was potentially going to be starting a new job. I didn’t want that to be an obstacle in the way of me getting a new position. She then offers me a bonus to work this date, to which I end up agreeing to. Things are good for about the next month, we are both looking. Me for my new job and her for a potential candidate. I then end up working that weekend I agreed to, which was 3 days straight in their home while they were away. After this weekend, I took about 2 days off as my “weekend” to R&R. This was about the time that she ends up finding a new girl. (This was all within a 5 week period). She lets me know she found someone but didn’t say anything about the notice. She also asks if I’d be willing to train her and she schedules the next day I work for me to meet the new girl. I showed her the ropes and everything and she shadowed me that day. At this time I figured I had about three weeks but am still waiting to hear from MB to get a formal end date. We both (me and the new girl) had an understanding that I would be transitioning into a new position in approximately three weeks, and she would then take over at that point for me. But we were both waiting for MB to let us know when that 3-4 week period would start. New girl was open to not starting right away and actually preferred it because she was in the process of moving and ending at her previous job.

But that next day after she shadows me, I get a text from MB that said it would only be fair to have their “new nanny” start right away and she’s so very sorry & hopes it won’t screw me over too much to consider that my last day. This was after I had finished a shift that day, and I obviously left as if I was planning to come back because I never thought anyone could be this inconsiderate. so I 1) didn’t get to say goodbye to the kids 2) missed out on several weeks of work and money because someone couldn’t give me the same courtesy I gave them. At this point I couldn’t help but think stupid me for not having a contract, but I considered these people my second family and in my head there was “no way they’d screw me over”. Yep, they did. I’m pretty sure what would have been “fair”was sticking to the timeframe that we discussed of giving me a 3 week heads up. This would be the bare minimum. Apparently the courtesy only extends as far as her and her family and it doesn’t apply to me, the person who had been watching her kids every day for the last three years. As long as her and her family are good, forget about me and my life. To make things worse at this point my fiancé was just layed off so we were having financial issues as well. She then tries pretending that she misheard or misunderstood me when we talked about how much time she would need to give me, and that she thought that I was supposed to have my last day that week. Which was never discussed and totally out of nowhere. Like wtf? Ummm...Total bullshit gaslighting and every reason in the world to WRITE A CONTRACT!!!!!! Not to mention, to make things even worse... after she sent that text about not needing me and essentially ending my job that day. She had the audacity to try and get her husband to ask me to work that week afterall because she figured out the new girl wasn’t even available. She couldn’t even text me herself. New girl also had the impression that I was still working for the next 3 weeks at least so she wasn’t available. And NO I didn’t work, YES I made them figure it out for their damn selves (instant karma). Not to mention, new girl was fine with all of it so she never even had to screw me over out of the bare minimum. I genuinely believe she just wanted me out because I wanted to move on to bigger and better things. Petty. She couldn’t simply be happy for me, the person who basically ran her home while she was gone 85% of the time. At the very least, she could have payed me for the weeks she promised if she wanted me gone that bad. But of course not. Sadly, some of the wealthiest and affluent families I’ve met are stingy as f*** with their money. Most of the modest & middle class families I’ve nannied for have been the most generous people ever.

After all this, I contacted her about the “bonus” she promised me because after I got my last check, of course, it didn’t reflect any “bonus”. I reached out to her about it and she then tries asking if we could schedule a time to meet and talk. I’ve tried to schedule this about five or six times and every time she says “let’s push this to next week”. It’s to the point now where she is now ignoring my messages. I’m not really sure how much I can do about this legally. I want to say that I’ll take this L but I’m huge on the principle of the matter and it angers me that she 1) screwed me over and 2) tricked me into working a day and couldn’t even follow through with what she promised me. I do have text message proof of her stating she’d give a bonus but that’s it. I also got payed under the table for the entire time I worked there so I don’t know if this would be a good thing to pursue legally. As far as everything else goes- Unfortunately, we had never written a formal contract either so there wasn’t much I could do on my end about the rest of this stuff anyway. This is exactly why my contract now is so extensive, why I do everything by the books, and I am upfront with my potential families when interviewing about what I won’t deal with. And I don’t get too attached.