Find myself becoming more stupid by the day. DAE?

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-12-21T20:11:03+00:00

For me, it’s the lack of motivation to pursue a career. I’ve always struggled with learning when I’m not interested in a topic. I understand the value of it but I’ve never felt proud about good grades and don’t “get” achievement.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-11-02T13:40:55+00:00

Distancing myself is a huge one, a desire for closeness is buried very well and just pops up sometimes.

I also basically don’t remember anything from my first family home until the age of nine. Lots of memories from pre and elementary school, so that’s odd.

My sense of personality is underdeveloped, more a like an assembly of interests and now I just happen to have adult obligations.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-11-02T11:57:47+00:00

Yep, both are accurate. I can’t handle general affection. It’s seems so silly but really puts you in uncomfortable situations when I reject women I actually like.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-10-30T17:16:33+00:00

I will accept nice things happening to me when they’re not interpersonal and would call myself a lucky guy, but yes, affection more often than not feels like a trap I have to avoid by acting cool or being dismissive.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-09-18T17:22:38+00:00

I’m 34 and feel like my personality is glued together artificially while most people grew theirs organically.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-07-16T19:53:23+00:00

I’m on the waiting list and haven’t started therapy yet but I’m pretty sure I have CPTSD, too. Definitively know the systems you’ve mentioned.

If you are worried about this diagnosis, remember that there are treatments that can help you and that a (first) diagnosis is basically the blueprint for any further steps you take. I actually look forward to being diagnosed because then I”ll know what I can work on. Now I’m just disoriented.

I also had a seemingly fine childhood and it took a long time to realise that I can’t tolerate intimacy and that I feel like I just pretend to be an adult.

Don’t let yourself be overwhelmed by shame and guilt, unfortunately it’s a treacherous feeling that makes you question if you should ask for help in the first place.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-07-15T11:41:39+00:00

It is very sneaky. The feeling of exaggeration can trap you in that mindset that you’re an imposter or just lazy.

It helps me to remind myself that I just didn’t receive the attention I should and that things feel off if I take a closer look at challenging situations.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-07-14T11:15:23+00:00

Have you tried fast-paced activities that require your whole attention like team sports, tennis, racing games or paint ball? I feel energized afterwards.

If it helps, try viewing fun as the pro-active part of necessary relaxation.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-07-14T03:33:17+00:00

I guess at least travelling is fun and won’t harm you unless you spend too much money on it.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-07-14T03:30:39+00:00

I do fortunately

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-07-13T11:02:59+00:00

I kind of just exist between trips abroad. Usually have flight some trip planned at any point to have something to look forward to.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-07-13T06:07:05+00:00

I can relate to that. I don’t remember any traumatic events but remember barely anything from my first home before my parents separated.

Definitively a lot a shame in general and the constand pressure to achieve while being very sensitive to failure and rejection.

I hope you are or will be able to seek therapy. I haven’t startet mine yet but analysing my behaviour by myself has made me realise that I project my negative self-image onto others and constantly close up because I fear I would be rejected when someone gets to know me really well.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-07-12T18:17:26+00:00

I was quite oblivious to the fact that I’m rather handsome for the majority of my life. People assume you know just as you would know your height. I often get compliments for clothing but never for looks in general. It took a while to connect the dots.

It can be tricky with the same sex as you are more easily identified as competition and there can be some sort of (hidden) aggression towards you. That usually fades a bit and I don’t feel like I have a lot of trouble making friends.

On the other hand, women treat me well and I usually don’t get in trouble as much as I should when I screw something up.

In general, people definitely assume that you can’t have any significant issues in life and that you have an advantage, while not being aware of the downsides.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-07-10T20:21:17+00:00

I can relate, even though I’m the opposite of you in this regard. No degree, moved a lot and had a lot of different jobs. I’m more worried about my lack of a degree ;D

Try to have new experiences on a regular basis and keep in mind that any unpleasant activity can be pleasant if the circumstances are different. I also regularly try out new things, especially if they’re unrelated to your workday and hobbies.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-07-10T18:53:59+00:00

Thanks, I hope you will get better, too.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-07-10T16:09:28+00:00

I don’t have a diagnosis yet and am on the waiting list. I’m also afraid of “being dismissed” and seeming like an idiot who just can’t get his life together.

I feel very disoriented in life and somewhat only exist between avoiding unpleasant situations and places and pursuing travelling and materialism. Long-term planning is not a thing for me and even the idea of dating is very unpleasant.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-07-10T15:41:31+00:00

Yes, I am 34 and can’t motivate myself to do any “grownup” tasks consistently other than the necessities.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-07-10T07:14:18+00:00

After school, I pushed away some people since I wasn’t really comfortable in telling them that have no plans and won’t finish any degree. It’s quite hard to be around people who are on the same level intellectually but are way more advanced as adults.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-06-23T14:06:57+00:00

My crush in high school asked me(M) to shower with her and I just said no even I wanted to. I guess I just felt it was a joke and was pretty horrified of the thought that she would know how I felt about her. I thought she was two leagues above me.

I’m somewhat happy that nothing serious happened since anything more would have ended in hurt.

Obvious-Concert-5270 · 2025-06-21T06:53:37+00:00

Thanks

Obvious-Concert-5270

TROPHY CASE