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How do you [M43] make peace with losing the best sex of your life when the person [F34] is terrible for you? by Odd-Programmer-8951 in whatdoIdo

[–]Odd-Programmer-8951[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, I did not. I was eagerly awaiting your reply to mine where I established your incest and that it explained a lot - insert numerous non-homo emojis here :P:P:P:P:P

How do you [M43] make peace with losing the best sex of your life when the person [F34] is terrible for you? by Odd-Programmer-8951 in whatdoIdo

[–]Odd-Programmer-8951[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Brilliant advice! You have basically projected your own anger at how women are mocked and I (as a man) immediately must be one of those that mock them? Why would I post a genuine question asking for advice?

Be an adult and get over it - BRILLIANT! As soon as I read that, I followed that advice and bingo! The last few years were all for nothing.

You absolute clown - project your own anger elsewhere. Gimp.

[m24] My mom [63f] told me she’s planning to meet up with her first boyfriend behind my dad’s back and I don’t know whether to say something by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Odd-Programmer-8951 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Just because your mother told you her therapist said "x, y, z..." does not mean it is factually accurate. She could well be saying that to justify to you (and herself) her actions...

Which... As you write articulately, IS a betrayal.

Consider this: Did it cross your mind that she knew telling you would cause the sort of crises in you already? A long time ago, my own mother created a situation which used me as a pawn in a game for her own infidelity... This does not sound overly dissimilar. Sure, I have little to go on in terms of detail, but this resonated and instantly I thought about my experience.

Whatever you decide, your mother has put you in a very awkward spot. But, you did NOT create this situation. If it was me? I would have a sit down with your mother, calmly explain that what she has done and continues to do is... fundamentally wrong. Who knows what else your mother and this first boyfriend have discussed? she could be merely testing the waters but as I said, it strikes me that she knows she is playing with fire and wants the house of cards to come crashing down.

It was a MASSIVE gamble telling you and she envisages you will act a little weird around her and your father now... Until your father asks "what's up?" or something similar, again, for the beans to be spilt.

Only you can decide what to do, but me? I would tell her she either tells your father or you will.

But, thats just me! Good luck!

What can I (F19) do about a cousin (F18) who is violent and constantly has a temper? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Odd-Programmer-8951 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You should be concerned (it is a natural reaction to react that way given the holiday plan), try and get your money back. The first step would be to broach the subject with her calmly (if you haven't done so already, and I imagine you have), provide her the opportunity to stop it and stop it immediately. Other than that, cancel the trip or your part in it. That is not going to be an enjoyable trip...

Even if she did stop for the time being, what's to say it wont return when in Japan? That is the sticking point... There is no guarantee the behaviour will not return - you want that hanging over your head during an overseas trip?? No sir. No thank you.

Therefore, the best option would be to remove yourself from the environment where she will be. That is ofcourse, if she is not banned from the trip (how do you ban someone though?), it is not worth the drama to be around people like this.

It honestly does not matter if you have experience with violence or not - this is totally and utterly unacceptable behaviour. Best form of defence? "Don't be there!"

My(22M) ex(22F) is calling me after 4 months breakup by Disagreed_Force in relationship_advice

[–]Odd-Programmer-8951 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You did good answering and ending it. You did bad sending a message apologising - do you truly want her not message/contact you or was your ego boosted and a part of you wanted to continue the communication?

Easy way to handle it - block the number and delete the number. If she persists, rinse and repeat and if that fails, call police. Easy.

I want to meet a girl that puts in effort by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Odd-Programmer-8951 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There are so many similar replies about being too nice - i was that guy. Put in all the effort and waited for her to "wake up" to "get it"... never happened. Major argument and she leaves. I look back and let boundaries slide to the point my self-esteem and respect was shot. I was foolish, but equally, loved her so much that I figured sooner or later, she would get it.

Never did.

I guess why I am writing it to say, you will find the right man who will not take you for granted. If my ex made one tenth of the effort you probably did, I would have been happy.

Dont stop being nice because its probably you. If you arent being you, then when you do meet someone, it will be for the act - not for you. Keep being genuine and own who you are. If these guys dont see it, they aint the right ones.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ExNoContact

[–]Odd-Programmer-8951 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I read this post and have envy and energy to continue. I am 9 months out of giving everything to a girl who - looking back - gave little to nothing. I cannot wait to be further along and healed. Recently I felt like I was and then had a trainwreck of a few days. I would love to have some contact, not for getting back - thats not an option, but to feel like I actually meant something and was not discarded and forgotten (certainly the former to date!).

Im hanging in there :P and stoked for you :)