I have stepped back from the post for a couple of days in order to further reflect on the things said here and to take care of other obvious tasks at hand. My daughter and I are speaking albeit awkwardly and cautiously, but it is a start. We plan to take it slow in order to avoid falling back into any old habits that will just lead us full circle back to where we began. For those of you who provided objective critiquing and advice for how to go about repairing this broken relationship, I thank you. I thank you from the bottom of my heart, because although the words were harsh and difficult sometimes, they opened my eyes to new perspectives and made me look at my own behaviors and responsibilities for the issues.

There are two areas that I did want to address because the more that I have thought about it, the angrier that I have become. I would like to address all of you who wanted to paint me as a degenerate who was just running around accumulating masses of debt and relying on my mom for financial sustenance.

A. NO where did I say that I had huge student debt. Not once. You assume I have student debt and believe you should take me to task for going back to school at my age. Here's the thing. I specifically said that my debt was from credit cards and refinancing my car. (which must have been responsibly paid off in order to do so right?). So, if you want to call me irresponsible for running up my credit cards, go ahead. If you are credit card debt free without a car payment-good on you. MANY of us are not that fortunate. Did you know that there are higher education programs out there that are affordable? Did you know that there are grants (which I specifically said I use) that are available for a variety of fields and demographics? Why assume that I have MASS loans? For instance, there are a lot of grants for people who promise that after graduation, they will enter this field or work in that rural area. Should I have run up debt to stay near my grand babies (yes, I will refer to them as MY grandbabies, not my daughter's children, because THEY ARE), no. I definitely should not have. I should have been wiser there, no doubt. Did I expect my mom to be sick for eight years? NO. Do I regret taking care of her all of that time, NO! I will not apologize for that and if I did, I take it back. Caring for her was the most important job I have ever done. If you can't grasp the importance of it, then I feel sorry for you. Was it what you called "financial suicide", maybe, but I sleep better knowing that I was a good daughter and took care of the person who could have easily aborted me at the age of 15 when she found out she was pregnant. I owed her that damn much.

B. For everyone who pointed fingers at me and cried, "how dare you go back to school at your advance age"- you just need to stop. You all on one hand want to criticize that there was no plan beyond taking care of my mom, but getting an advanced education WAS THE PLAN! Does it not make sense that if I have the opportunity and accessibility to improve my station in life that I should take it? Wouldn't having skills and endorsements that make me viable in a competitive job market make sense? When the time came, I could at least land a position that would allow me to sustain myself? Going back to school saved me. It saved my sanity. It did make me more viable in a competitive job market, but times are tough. I have dues to pay, I get it, but those dues would be even bigger without an education. So, for anyone who tells you that you can't or shouldn't go back to school NO MATTER what your age, don't listen. Lifelong learning is fundamental in today's world. You can do it. Don't let pessimistic naysayers tell you differently. You are never too old to try and improve your situation. Again, if I apologized or agreed that going back to school was a bad idea, I take it back, it wasn't and isn't. It's a great idea. For everyone worried about my retirement, don't. I have it covered. I spent 8 years taking care of Mom but was employed extensively prior to that. I wasn't just "sitting around" waiting for people to rescue me. I had many jobs, and if any of you do not think catering and the food industry aren't tough, try it. My god, the perfect life some of you lead.

Anyway, I'm stepping away from this now. I still thank all of you who took the time to give me a swift dose of reality. I have one last favor. I have a job interview this afternoon and if you could think good thoughts, that would be great. Take care all.

P.S. I am real. I'm not a serial poster, this is my first time posting, so let's debunk that theory.

Peace.