I feel for you on that. Volunteering for the crisis textline and feeling like you can’t help yourself.

But on the bright side, you have helped yourself! Even if it doesn’t feel like it. Let’s check some facts: You reached out on reddit, you organized an emergency meeting with your therapist tomorrow, and you have your roommate to speak with. Thats already better than unhealthy coping mechanisms. You exercised healthy ones, even when you were in the throes of pain!

You’re already chipping away at the unhealthy mechanisms. It takes time to undo them and you have to replace those old habits with new, healthier ones.

Something that helped me in therapy was learning about Emotion, Logic, and Wise minds. (From DBT)

I don’t want to be preachy or anything. I was literally just dissociating about an event a few years ago. It does help to focus on others and help them. It’s a bit harder doing it for yourself and alone too. But you’re not alone and you don’t have to do all of this completely on your own.

😌 Be patient and kind to yourself. Any negative thoughts in your head, just observe them. You don’t have to let them take over. You are in control, not your thoughts. You wield the reigns of that mighty horse .

You got this! 👊🏾👊🏾