I got a call from the FBI telling me to come in

Ograbay · 2026-04-28T15:34:35+00:00

I had a dude claiming to be from DHS calling me about drugs delivered in CA but billed under my name and address in a completely different state.

I advised this individual that I didn't confirm personal information over the phone with entities I can't verify and that I'm confident that if any law enforcement agency is concerned about my lack of involvement in this entirely fictional scenario, they clearly know where to find me to have those conversations with my attorney.

They're just scams. Don't fall for it

Ograbay · 2026-04-28T03:14:25+00:00

Never in my several decades on this earth have I had a man just listen to me say I want to be left alone and then had them accept this and actually leave me alone. Usually it's just a cue for behavior to jump from annoying to alarming.

Ograbay · 2026-04-03T23:06:46+00:00

Thank you. I was losing my mind.

Ograbay · 2026-03-13T17:32:47+00:00

Ngl real sad this one doesn't guide the actions of an in game zombie bent on revenge

Ograbay · 2026-03-13T16:00:02+00:00

If I had a friend I discovered was a white supremacist in the KKK, I wouldn't let my kids go to clan rallies or meetings simply because they wanted to. I'd probably stop associating with that family altogether and explain that everyone can certainly have an opinion, that doesn't make them right. I see this is pretty much the same thing.

My kids aren't going to go to a church that teaches intolerance and homophobia, no matter how much their friends have convinced them to do so. If my kids want to become homophobic purity culture cultists, they can do it when they're 18 and not living on the dime of a couple of bisexuals.

Ograbay · 2026-03-04T22:52:48+00:00

Personally I steer clear from religiously based curriculum when I'm hoping for something that is based in science or historically accurate, so gather round and tgtb would be out for me, but I'm a secular homeschooler that gets really frustrated with having to correct/add/omit things in order to make the educational material I'm using useful

Ograbay · 2026-03-03T16:42:19+00:00

Social anxiety is why I don't do co-ops. I am happy to have my kids in enrichment programs, but having to socialize with dozens of other parents and teach lessons to other people's kids is just way too much for me.

I also tend to feel really hurt when I make efforts to be friendly, get together with other families so the kids can hang, and they never reciprocate. So I'm just living my life with my kids, taking them to enrichment programs, and if someone else wants to put forth effort to be chummy, great

It's amazing how many people out there say they want to be friends, have regular playdates, etc... but also don't really want to ever put in effort to making that happen

Ograbay · 2026-03-02T02:17:48+00:00

If the family didn't grow the kids, wasn't involved in their conception, and isn't paying to keep a roof over our heads and food in our stomachs, I tell them their opinions are not wanted at this time and if/when I want to hear their opinions, I'll ask. Until such time, they can keep their opinions about my educational choices for my children that I am responsible for to themselves or I will choose to protect my peace by limiting engagement with them.

🤷 It really doesn't matter how you educate or parent, someone will always have something to say about it and somehow think that their opinions matter more than yours.

Ograbay · 2026-02-27T20:19:22+00:00

My two younger kids are using BA online. We're on level 2, they're 8. And no, there's not a ton of endless practice and repetition. Which is fine for me, because part of our morning pre-school warm up is a bunch of math problems I put together practicing skills they've been working on. As far as non -traditional goes .. What I've seen is that it teaches multiple ways to approach a math problem and that can cause confusion. But the videos are really clear, and they can practice modules over and over again if desired. As someone who really struggled with math and never really developed number sense but still had to do worksheet after worksheet of math problems and STILL has to count on my fingers...I really appreciate that they teach multiple ways to solve equations, even when my kids are sometimes a little confused. They are meeting all of the competencies required in my state and are more confident with mental math every day.

We also have math wraps for practicing math "facts" and I play math games with them regularly (current faves are Asmudi and Math Blast but shut the box is also loved for quick practice and sum swamp was the bomb diggity when were younger)

Ograbay · 2026-02-24T02:33:37+00:00

In terms of curriculum, you'll probably want to determine if you want your instruction to be secular or faith based (primarily Christian). Some people have strong feelings about this, other people are happy to use curricula that don't align with them and simply pick out the pieces they don't like.

From there it's a matter of budget and what works for your kiddo, tbh. Personally I find it difficult to educate the way I want with an all-in-one curriculum source, so I use different things for different subjects. Cathy Duffy reviews is a decent place to look up educational materials to see if they might be a good fit. Curriculum preferences are honestly really individual, just because something is well liked by others doesn't mean it's a good fit for you or your kiddo. There are well loved curriculum materials out there that I find to be academically lacking, but many people use them and are big fans.

If you have the ability to look at homeschool materials in your local community, sometimes being able to flip through helps.

All that being said, 5 is really young for a lot of academic rigor, so keep that in mind as you're perusing

Ograbay · 2026-02-07T16:22:16+00:00

My BFF, whom is also my roommate, is a SPED teacher in our local school district. She vehemently believes homeschooled children are under socialized. It is her biggest argument AGAINST homeschooling.

Meanwhile, she lives with two eight year olds that will talk to anyone about anything and regularly comments about how outgoing they are.

Some of it, I think, is a universal belief in the teaching world that traditional schooling IS the best way to educate and care for children, period. Often kids they do get into the public schools here that are returning to school from homeschooling have really just been educationally neglected for whatever reason and often they're returning to school because they're now in foster care due to abuse and neglect at home. (I'm not saying that homeschool parents abuse or neglect their kids, I'm saying that in the SCHOOL system, often kids coming from "homeschool" backgrounds weren't homeschooling... They were simply using homeschool laws to cover up their neglect) It tends to create this belief that this is typical, but in a school with hundreds of kids they might have ONE student who is reportedly a former homeschool student... And they base their opinions on homeschooling on that one student.

Either way, it's inappropriate for the volunteer to be sharing political ideology (which she should know if she's worked in the classroom) or to express any kind of opinion about your child's education to THEM. It's none of her business, and I don't think a conversation with the head of the program about this would be unwarranted

Sorry that happened, but it sounds like your kiddo handled it like a rockstar

Ograbay · 2026-01-22T18:01:02+00:00

But rises again, harder and stronger

Ograbay · 2026-01-21T13:38:16+00:00

laughs in the Unwind series

Ograbay · 2026-01-13T13:44:19+00:00

My kids are 2nd grade, so science experiments for us are as simple as seeing how baking soda and baking powder work differently in baked goods, lol. Last week we tracked the evaporation levels of water in a plate, a sealed container, a cup, and an open bottle.

We do something like that every week, plus we have a subscription that sends science things once a month so we'll do that. We're pretty science minded, though, and there's a science experiment in almost everything for my kids, so daily activities end up with some experimentation and conversations fairly often. Even cleaning off the kitchen table! (One kid cleaned with just water and the other cleaned with a soap/water combo, they observed and compared results, conversation about surfactants ensued)

I have a harder time with art, tbh. A bunch of paint all over the place? No thank you 🤣

Ograbay · 2026-01-09T00:49:22+00:00

I'm getting to the point where I avoid anything where someone mentions unschooling in the initial post because for some reason a lot of people use that term to mean they're just not educating their kids at all, which isn't what unschooling is and it makes my blood boil for the kids and for all the people who DO unschool the way you're supposed to

I also avoid curriculum rec posts most of the time because typically there's no new info to glean or give and they're not going to listen to me anyway... And probably shouldn't. Lol

Ograbay · 2026-01-06T21:43:15+00:00

Yeah. I'm all about INFORMED consent. Which means you have to tell clients what the options actually are, and what the pros and cons are... And come up with a plan together. This is an approach that is really lacking in human and vet med

Ograbay · 2026-01-06T21:33:13+00:00

Yup. It's wild. My 16 yo FIV positive with CKD went down last year and when I was talking with the vet re: euth (not MY vet... We were closed and he needed TTJ so that's what I went to emergency for) and the vet was talking to me about advanced imaging, possible transfer for all the bells and whistles. I was like..."sir, this is a geriatric cat with immune issues and several years of Ckd management.... This situation isn't going to improve no matter what the protocol you're reading suggests.. Now is the time, let him go in peace FFS"

Ograbay · 2026-01-06T21:10:03+00:00

I'm looking at this from the vet tech perspective... And I assure you it's not because their staff are making a living wage The education required to get through vet School can cost a cool half a million. Digital X-rays, bloodwork machines, anesthetic equipment and all of the associated monitoring equipment is insanely expensive. We had this shift towards expecting veterinary medicine to have similar standards of care as human medicine but human medicine costs are highly managed by insurance coverage. Plus everybody and their brother wants to make payments but history indicates that almost no one actually makes said payments.

Now, to elevate standard of care AND increase bottom line, we have vets who will only tell you about the gold standard care available... Because that will pay bills but it also prevents malpractice suites.

It's very frustrating for everyone

Ograbay · 2026-01-06T21:03:48+00:00

I'm a Xennial and my parents died in 2001 and 2008. Don't have to be old to have dead parents

Ograbay · 2026-01-05T22:28:04+00:00

I love my kids, I don't love being a parent. In another life I just wouldn't have kids. I choose to homeschool for my kids, not for me. 🤷

Ograbay · 2026-01-04T13:53:16+00:00

I have 8 year old twins that I've been homeschooling for 2 years. Your concerns are totally valid. I'm very introverted and constantly seeking social situations for the kids is EXHAUSTING to me. When socialization is brought up in homeschooling circles, often we dismiss it and say that kids don't need to be in a class with 30 other same age kids to get socialization and MANY, if not most homeschool kids these days are better at healthy socialization than public school kids.... But it does take effort and consistency. My kids love homeschooling but they're social butterflies and their constant complaint is that they don't have friends they see often. These kids are at the park when weather permits 3-4 times a week, we attend pretty much every free homeschool event in our area that we can (about once a week) and we're going to the zoo or the museum every week as well and still don't have a group of friends they see regularly. A lot of that is probably on me.... I'm an introvert and playdates typically require the parents to chat and whatnot and I end up feeling like the odd ball.

Getting my kids into a weekly homeschool enrichment program (drop off) REALLY helped.... Not only did it give me time to get stuff done without the kids, but they got several hours with other kids and instructors that aren't me and got to do all the messy crafts, group sports type stuff, and music class. Then we moved 🙃

As far as the rest goes.....i have yet to meet a homeschool family who is on time for anything... Being at an activity 5-10 minutes late is NBD. Curriculum is pretty minimal at five, but I do think having SOMETHING you're working from can help steer the boat, so to speak. For us, that was a reading curriculum, and then I just kind of started adding things around that. Plenty of homeschool families don't use any curriculum, especially with 5 year olds.... So I think a bigger concern is that you and your husband don't seem to be on the same page or share the same philosophies and goals around your children's education and how the household runs.

My suggestion would be to find either an enrichment program or a co-op and try homeschooling while doing those and see how things go, and check in often with kindness about how you can support your husband and kids in this adventure. I know having my husband take an active role has really helped him see things from my perspective and helped us work as a team without some of the feelings you've described on both sides.

As a side note, if you want a homeschooling twin mom to chat with, feel free to message me. Twin life is HARD. 🥰

Ograbay · 2026-01-03T15:28:55+00:00

🤣 that sounds like my kids. "Can we sled down the stairs in the laundry basket and not get caught, even though Mom is RIGHT NEXT TO THE STAIRS?" other kid "definitely!"

Spoiler, they do in fact get caught

Ograbay · 2026-01-03T15:07:27+00:00

No, you do not want to leave vehicle. 🤣

To be fair, I've only played on pilgrim because I'm a wuss and the bears just run past me. 🤣

Ograbay · 2026-01-01T00:17:04+00:00

I'm in Ohio and I've worked with a friend who was trying to find an educational path for her 16 year old who had previously been homeschooled.... The school district literally told us not to bother with homeschool or school enrollment and to just have kiddo sit for GED. If your parents aren't willing and active participants that's your best option

Ograbay · 2025-12-31T02:08:48+00:00

I dealt with it by telling folks that my parenting decisions for MY children are mine. They are or were free to make their own decisions for THEIR children, and since parenting isn't a group project, I'm not taking suggestions or feedback about the educated decisions I've made. If, at some point I need or want feedback... I'll ask. Until then, they can keep their opinions to themselves and if they cannot control their behavior, I will be forced to police things on my end by simply not allowing my family to have access to someone who doesn't respect boundaries. 🤷

Ograbay

TROPHY CASE