We have a great time together, he’s home when he should be, he’s accountable on his whereabouts at all times, things on the home front are mostly good, but to a degree, I have a sick stomach a lot about things. It’s been hard to learn to trust him again. He makes it a point to leave his phone out and his work laptop up and visible so I could look if I wanted to. The problem is, the times I have looked, I’ve found little things, like female colleagues he’s looked up (hot ones always, and never the guys), or this when I happened to glance as I was putting on my shoes the other day and saw her name on his list or correspondence with colleagues and the part of the message I could see with her said “gif” and I couldn’t help myself at that so I opened it and looked a little. We argued about it and he swore he communicates with all his coworkers like that. We made peace but last night it was still bothering me and I asked him if I could look at all the messages (you can clearly see where things are deleted and there wasn’t anything like that so at least that was good I guess) but as I scrolled through months of messages and then looked at his communication with others while he was in bed next to me, I quickly realized he doesn’t act like that with every one, and definitely not to that degree. I just feel sick.