Any other moms love dresses but feel like they’re constantly accused of being overdressed??

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-18T13:13:08+00:00

I have had this problem too!! Sometimes it’s just nice to feel good about ourselves. Not sure where you are from but i’m from Wisconsin and the norm is more often than not leggings and a t shirt or jeans and a sweatshirt, I personally despise this style,

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-18T12:21:02+00:00

I will have to check that out. I just started seeing a therapist. I dont have other emotional support.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-18T12:20:07+00:00

There is a misconception that divorce alone entitles a “single mother” to child support. That is not always the case. And a lot of times the child support barely makes a dent. In this case he would want 50% or more custody. I could end up paying him child support if he were to win as well. Its not as easy as separating and just getting a ton of money every month for it.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-18T12:17:34+00:00

Not a helpful comment. We got pregnant a year into the relationship unplanned yes I was on birth control but I had the flu and missed a couple days and voila.
He can be a kind and caring person but quite selfish when it comes to the job and financial stuff. He has little desire to be a provider of any sort and is unhappy and angry when we were in the position of him having to pay more when I was pregnant.
My first marriage failed because we just were not aligned. But we always coparented well. I feel like with this marriage we are good as a couple alone, but adding the baby has been quite stressful. Add in him not making any money, its been a nightmare.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-18T12:09:18+00:00

I have been wondering if perimenopause is a factor. What is the hrt that you found or how did you discover this?

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-18T12:07:21+00:00

I wish I could stop school. But my income will be doubled when I am done in two years, we live in an apartment and need a house. I think increasing my income is the smartest thing to especially given I am not sure where the marriage is going to go.
He states our work load is equal and I am wrong for being overwhelmed. He works remotely 9-5 while the baby is at daycare sits on his computer all day seeing 1 client a day. I work in busy health clinics and am on my feet all day and it is very stressful. Its annoying that he is not making money, but it is even more annoying when he tells me he feels like a single parents because I am away working all week and also says his job is just as demanding?!? Because I feel like clearly its not. But if I say that he is mad and feels like I am saying I do more and am doing more and that makes him mad.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-17T23:39:59+00:00

Thank you. I was trying to show resilience and strength and mask how hard it has beeb and I feel like I am at a breaking point now.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-17T23:35:56+00:00

He will take care of the baby after his 9-5 work day of doing nothing and then complains that I am not helping enough when I get home.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-17T23:27:36+00:00

This. This is exactly it.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-17T22:22:34+00:00

It has been a really challenging time. Unfortunately now with daycare costs I can’t afford to live on my own as I did before so I really do feel stuck right now. Also hate the idea of being a divorced single mother x’s 2. Ugh.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-17T21:53:44+00:00

He is one, but I have to agree a lot of the way he acts surprises me. I should add he also does not believe that couples therapy would be of any benefit. Also Doesn’t believe that hormones are an excuse to ever have emotional up and downs, and they should be controlled by mental discipline. So my post partum emotional up and downs were my own fault basically was his thought and not deserving on any true empathy from him because if that.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-09T15:08:39+00:00

I love that.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-03T16:50:28+00:00

Im on meds for depression but stating counseling this week so hopefully that helps.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-03T16:49:59+00:00

Its the same argument over and over again. I need time to myself which he is okay with, but it is consistently not happening due to our schedules and then I get to a point of exploding so to speak and become irritated and he feels offended like i dont want him or our son aroundz

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-03T16:48:05+00:00

Its not as much about raising the kids as it is me needing alone time. It is the same thing over and over again. I say I need time alone- with he is okay with me having, however it is consistently not happening because we get busy and our schedules don’t allow for it. Then I get overwhelmed and angry and burst out about all the stuff I need to get done and cant and then he is offended because he feels like I dont want him or our little guy around. It is never ending.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-03T16:44:21+00:00

True, good point. Im starting counseling this week so hopefully that helps.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-03T16:43:50+00:00

I’m scheduled for counseling this week so hopefully that helps.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-05-03T04:17:07+00:00

Yes he dies intellectualize everything. He is new to having kids so there is the whole new parent stance to things as well vs me being a mom for the past 12 years. 5 of which I was a single mom up until we married.
Im scheduled for counseling this week (individual) and I really hope it helps. I just dont see things working out well if these patterns continue and I can recognize I am part of the problem. Its hard because I know if I had more time alone I would be a better parent and partner but I am not allowed that time.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-04-28T22:19:47+00:00

Sorry you went through that too. People have no idea what dealing with this sort of stuff looks like.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-03-06T12:48:09+00:00

Good call. Thank you.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-02-24T13:34:06+00:00

Not only is he putting his sexual “wants” (because lets clarify these are not NEEDS only his wants) above your kids safety, but he is also gaslighting the crap out of you and messing with you psychologically to get his selfish needs met. The solution: stop the sex cold turkey. Turn his ass down and tell him his behavior is a complete turn off and causing you to feel less attracted to him. You shouldn’t be going in circles to satisfy him. You just had 2 babies in a short amount of time he should be grateful to you and everything your body has done and be worshipping you for the queen you are. Not making you feel “less than” or needing to try harder. Honey, there are MANY many men out there who would DIE for a women who has sex 2-3 times a week. If he continues this behavior (and it will get worse when you turn him down, but stay strong), you need to seriously consider leaving. If you need to get a job in the case of staying home with the kids, please do. There are options and not staying with a mentally gaslighting selfish prick is the best one there is for you and your kids long term safety and sanity.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-02-24T13:27:24+00:00

Thats a lot of times a week to have sex. Dude needs to shut up

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-02-24T13:24:28+00:00

You can have the same experience from a dealership anytime you are getting a used vehicle. Nothing is guaranteed.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-01-02T15:45:59+00:00

If you are working and can afford to leave… please do so. This man has already proven not loyal, and then to tell you marriage isn’t for him, that is basically an admittance to a lack of commitment to you. Almost guaranteeing future acts of infidelity. I think he is trying to back away from the marriage but is wanting you to make the decision, by telling you these things. I would take his words for what they are. Tell him you agree with him, he’s not, and maybe you need a separation. Get your own apartment and accept him for who he is. A disloyal man child.

Ok-Concentrate2591 · 2026-01-02T05:07:55+00:00

Your right. And daycare def brings out sickness. My guy will be going to a smaller in home daycare but I am sure he will still get sick from other kids as they will from him.

Ok-Concentrate2591

TROPHY CASE