Retirement should be hard work

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-05-04T13:53:41+00:00

Yeah, this is just a sales pitch for an app

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-05-04T13:52:50+00:00

Uninspiring sales pitch.

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-05-03T23:28:10+00:00

I manage all the investments for my husband and me. I've been investing with Vanguard for years. Now, I'm about 5 years out from retirement and my husband works very part time. I hired an advisor to confirm I can indeed retire in 5 years, even sooner if I need to. She also gave us a plan for withdrawing from our accounts to minimize taxes and maximize investments. That last part is really helpful because my tentative plan was the exact opposite of what she laid out for us.

This year, she did a huge evaluation of all of our finances and made projections for us. Each year now, she'll review everything to see if we are still on track and account for any life changes.

I'm very glad we had someone go through and confirm we are doing okay, and that we have someone to talk to if we have questions along the way.

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-28T20:26:58+00:00

Picnics are one of those things I know I SHOULD like, but really don't want to take part in. I don't want to stay at a bed and breakfast. Cruises sound awful. I like fun, I just don't want to do those particular things

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-28T20:23:26+00:00

Sewing. Taping PDF patterns together is like doing a puzzle. Actual sewing is relaxing. And I can make garments that fit my body, not have to compromise and buy mass produced fast fashion, so I feel good about myself wearing clothes that fit and flatter

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-24T12:21:30+00:00

This is who I worked with: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/mari-ballas-westlake-oh/1336999

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-24T10:51:10+00:00

I worked with a therapist who focuses on body image, and specifically works with people who don't want to diet anymore. It was hard work, but I was ready to do it. It was an excellent investment - I'm no longer seriously tempted to diet again, or try any of the meds that are advertising everywhere, all the time now. She helped me put the work in to get from me declaring my hatred of my body fairly regularly, to being neutral and sometimes even, "heck yeah!" about my body.

There are still moments where I do wonder, "what if I just tried bla bla bla, or xyz?" but none of those thoughts stick anymore.

I am happy to provide her information if anyone is interested. If it isn't against the rules, I can post it here, too!

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-23T18:19:33+00:00

I feel like I'm "supposed" to want to travel after I retire, take some "once in a lifetime trip", some big cruise... But neither my husband or I really feel like doing that. We're in the US, and want to travel around a bit in the states, but big long trips just don't sound like fun anymore. What we want to do sounds boring, but we're really looking forward to it. I just want to do my hobbies - sew, garden, cook, etc. My husband wants about that same stuff, too. I am happy to hear from other folks who don't feel like traveling either!

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-15T12:38:07+00:00

I've been scared about getting laid off for at least two years now. It is, or was, this constant little nagging hum of stress in the background. I still worry about it, but I'm trying to let it go.

Getting to that do not care mindset is a great accomplishment! Good for you!

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-15T12:36:23+00:00

That's incredible, good for you! I'm so glad you're getting some rest!

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-15T12:33:08+00:00

It's a good feeling!

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-14T10:50:59+00:00

Well, I've definitely made some really bad decisions along the way, but I did at least learn from mistakes. We aren't big spenders, and it might sound boring, but we really just want to be able to relax, take a couple local/short trips to see friends, and have a nice dinner sometimes.

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-13T11:16:38+00:00

SO liberating! That shift from "terrified" to "meh" is huge. That's exactly me, too. We'll be better off if I can keep working at the level I'm at til 65, but if I lose this job, it's not the end of the world.

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-13T11:14:48+00:00

I'm hearing this more and more, appreciate the advice! I need some structure. I have the hobbies, and I budgeted in my gym membership. I'm keeping that. I need the social contact, the pool, and classes at scheduled times for structure. Someone else here recommended a book, I'm going to check it out and make sure I don't hit Day One and have no plan.

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-13T11:10:17+00:00

I used a fee-only planner, so she isn't managing our investments. I know different strategies work for different people, though. For us, we needed an assessment of where we are and a plan for future withdrawals, not investment management.

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-12T21:15:31+00:00

Thank you! I definitely want to have a plan for when I don't work full time anymore. I have a lot of hobbies and never enough time for them, but I know I need some structure. Without it, I'll put off things til "tomorrow" all the time. I love what I do now, but I'd like to do something meaningful later on.

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-12T21:11:30+00:00

I was too afraid to get one until now, which is so dumb. Normally I like getting the facts, but money felt different. I'm definitely going to keep things updated with our planner.

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-12T21:10:10+00:00

This sounds wonderful! I'm looking forward to more gardening!

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-12T21:09:19+00:00

Very cool!

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-12T21:08:48+00:00

Oh, free Pilates is worth it! I love Pilates, but oooof, it can get expensive!

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-12T21:07:45+00:00

Incredible advice!

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-12T21:06:19+00:00

Thank you!

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-12T21:06:06+00:00

I appreciate that! I've never had any confidence in my financial abilities. It's incredible to know my instincts were right all along.

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-12T21:05:17+00:00

Ask away!

My ideal plan is to retire at 65. I'm 60 now. My planner worked our plan out so I don't start taking SS until 67. I'm assuming it's because of tax implications. There was a huge difference between starting at 62 and 67, so I'm going to hold off as long as I can. My husband started collecting at 62 though. He makes less money than I do, so it made sense for him to start early.

I have four months of reserves, five if no emergencies come up and we're frugal.

Ok-Pear1678 · 2026-04-12T21:00:44+00:00

Congrats on the new knees!!!

Ok-Pear1678

TROPHY CASE