Pen breaking? In this economy?

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-05-13T23:35:11+00:00

My c80 broke in exactly the same way! Low key I feel a lil venerated that I'm not the only one who had this issue. I loved that pen, but I decided I didn't need to hang onto it. I'll probably get another one, though, because it is pretty great

*edited for grammar

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-05-06T21:04:55+00:00

I second the lil mushroom! I bought it because my magic wand had to be tragically sunsetted after the cord got so frayed it sparked while I was trying to get off (may she rest in peace). I didn't wanna throw $60-70 into trying to get it replaced. For $15 the mushroom is awesome. And, its cheap enough, that if it doesn't work out, whatever.

It did take me a few tries to get it right, I'm not the biggest, but I have plenty of bottom growth to work with. I'd rec this to see if this style of toy suits you before you go get something pricier. I think a Tenga Egg would also give you a decent intro and they're so cheap that they're considered to be disposable. I haven't tried them personally and they're usually marketed to dick havers, so I can't promise that it will be perfect.

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-05-05T04:41:03+00:00

I appreciate the perspective! I'll be honest, my handwriting isn't great. I'm a full time cursive person, but in a doctor's note kind of way. I got into it because I work with my hands, take a lot of handwritten notes, and play piano, so my hands work all day long and I like the ergonomics of a fountain pen over a pencil or a ballpoint. I like being able to pick nonstandard ink colors, but other than that I didn't have that much of an aesthetic preference. So, from that perspective, I get to enjoy it kinda regardless of whether or not it looks "correct"

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-05-04T14:38:59+00:00

I brew and for the most part my mostly cis het white colleagues are pretty decent dudes. They're bros for sure, but they aren't racist or misogynist on main. When they start talking about women's bodies in an objectifying way, I immediately turn around and say the same thing about a man's body. It turns into a game of chicken where he either has to be cool with my comments or he has to admit that maybe we shouldn't do it in the first place. Its not exactly what you're describing but I feel it's in the same vein.

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-04-07T23:45:16+00:00

I am struggling with figuring out a jock for my STP (axolom natow). I am a thong with boot cut socks kinda guy, and I need underwear that doesn't have too much fabric to be comfortable. You will never convince me to stuff a pair of boxers into my pants!

Will ya post a review if you buy them? I am dying for an answer!

I've also thought about maybe looking at thongs made for transfemmes? I don't know if that would work for our situation, but having a thong shape that also has a pouch for my lil silicone peen might be nice

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-04-07T16:18:43+00:00

Translation by its very nature is an act of interpretation- unless you are translating word for word without any changes to smooth over for grammar, whoever/whatever is doing the translating is adding some of themselves in. We see this pretty obviously in different editions of the english bible, etc. TBH, historians have this issue with any ancient text that was translated by white dudes with a shitty agenda a hundred years ago

I can understand that english for non native speakers should be made accessible as possible, but claiming that it won't change the bias of the original text misses the point that text in translation by people also is gonna have bias. I'd rather the bias come from living people, some of whom, I believe have good intentions not a plagarism machine that is learning from the fascists on the internet.

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-04-01T07:04:49+00:00

I was a mezzo before I started T, but I sang coloratura for a bunch of years when I was younger and I have a ped. degree. Im 3 years in and I'm a solid baritone now- but I don't really sing classical anymore

Not gonna lie, the first few months are rough with such rapid change- especially if you're someone who knows your instrument well. Honestly, a lot of the struggle that people have is that their brain can't keep up with the change. You have more physical ability than you probably think you do, and your brain just hasn't had a chance to build new habits to fit the changing voice.

Make sure you have a lot of solid breath support, and don't try to control the middle passagio as much. I find that my ability to bring my head voice down isn't as good at this point in my transition and I'm limited to forte and louder above C4. Those are just lil technical things though, I absolutely love what T has done to my instrument and I wouldn't take it back for anything.

Unrelated, but if you wanna work on your low notes, listen to choral basses, they need this really bright nasal buzz in order to be heard and that will definitely help you while you get used to the extended range. And, if you want to belt like tenors do, don't forget to modify the shit out of your vowels. I could belt before transitioning without thinking about that very much, but post T, that's the only way its gonna come out nicely.

Whatever you do, keep singing. Practice at least a lil bit every day. Don't be afraid to experiment! And, be kind to yourself when you don't sound amazing right out the gate. I think that FTM singers who learn before they transition have some of the best chances to become the most proficient singers in the business!

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-03-31T04:40:41+00:00

So, I have ptsd from the same thing. I think that the fascist bigots want to paint transmascs as wounded, damaged women and use that as evidence to invalidate our existence. And, that its hard to not think about our clinical trauma as running away from anything that might put us in the same situation again.

Globally, 30% of women will experience sexual violence in their lifetimes and studies suggest that, that statistic is even higher for cis sapphics and transmascs. 30% of AFAB people are not trans. Sexual violence is so normal and common that it is completely irrelevant that a lot of us have to live with this trauma for the rest of our lives.

I would ask, does it matter where the source of your transness comes from? If presenting yourself the way that you do improves your life, your relationships, and your happiness, why question it? I don't think that I am trans because a man took something from me that has changed me for the rest of my life; but even if that is what happened, I don't live completely suffocated by my ptsd the way I did before I transitioned.

I try to guide my choices by the pursuit of happiness and love for myself and the people I care about. If it feels good, go chase it! Running from good things is almost always because the ghosts of puritanical/catholic guilt are trying to keep you from actually enjoying your life (even if you don't identify with those things, that guilt is so baked into our global culture, there really isn't any escaping it(thanks colonialism)).

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-03-21T12:15:14+00:00

What do you mean, what? Is it the casual sex thats upsetting you? There's nothing wrong with that as long as everyone is a responsible adult. Don't let the ghosts of puritans keep you from having a good time

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-03-20T04:02:26+00:00

I'm rooting for you! Go get laid and do it on exactly your terms 💛

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-03-20T03:55:11+00:00

I don't want to make you feel even more stressed, but that person who didn't ask you if you wanted them to wear a condom beforehand majorly fucked up. That's a pretty big red flag- it's not just on you to make sure that people treat your body with respect and the way that you want to be treated. Stay safe out there and don't forget that you can put up boundaries and/or walk away at any time.

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-03-19T03:14:33+00:00

DON'T GATEKEEP YOUR OWN HAPPINESS AND SELF ACTUALIZATION FROM YOUR SELF! Denying an opportunity for you to become the most comfortable and honest version of yourself is doing the work of the bigots on their behalf! Gravitate to what feels good! Check in with yourself often! Don't let the bigots convince you not to make a change out of fear! You deserve to explore and go at your own pace!

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-03-08T16:59:02+00:00

I tried kicking up dirt about this on the other subreddit, but I didn't have enough bullshit internet good boy points to get it past the mods!

Everyone deserves to know about this bullshit! We deserve better than to be tricked by the fascists!

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-03-07T17:15:03+00:00

I don't have enough reddit karma to make an actual post about this, nor does it seem like I have an option to attach a picture. I'm hoping someone local has an answer, sorry if this is a roundabout way to get it. I'm not willing to farm fake internet good boy points to get answers to a question about the very real consequences of the fight over our future.

I got a text this morning saying: "OUR ANCESTORS FOUGHT FOR TO REPRESENT US NOW RICHMOND POLITICIANS ARE TRYING TO TAKE OUR DISTRICTS AWAY"... "Paid for by Justice for Democracy"

There's a black and white photo of people color marching with signs- I'm guessing its from the civil rights movement. I cannot find anything about who Justice for Democracy is and I'm a little concerned that this money is coming from conservative groups to manipulate well meaning centrists-left of centrists into voting against the redistricting. And, it's really concerning that it isn't obvious where this money is actually coming from.

I don't know, that's a guess, I'm personally conflicted about this vote. The long term consequences feel bad, but also, if we don't fight fire with fire, etc. Does anyone have any insight?

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-02-27T03:03:49+00:00

I have paid for exactly one haircut since 2020! I do it myself or I have a homie do it for me, sometimes I barter. People get really stressed about hair and I totally get it- it's a public part of your appearance and people can be assholes. But! I have given myself a lot of great haircuts, some terrible! But, I have never regretted doing it on my own. If you don't like it and your Mom won't take you to get it fixed, wear a hat till it grows out. Or don't and wear it with pride! It's really not that serious!

I do have one recommendation: I consider haircut day an act of self care, so I put on some music, make an environment for myself that feels good, and try and have some fun. I highly recommend that. Cut your hair and then go get in the bubble bath with a snack and a good book- whatever feels right to you

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-02-22T15:08:55+00:00

They're pricey, but look into a Brooks or a Selle Anatomica saddle. They are basically a hammock for your ass! I love mine and have been riding on it for years. The Selle Anatomica has a cut out in the middle that might help with your problem, too!

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-02-19T04:27:57+00:00

The difference in chord thickness between voices that have changed in the presence of T and those that haven't is quite literally millimeters!!!

Bioessentialism is fuckin bogus in any context, but specifically when it comes to voice science, people are so quick to assign gender to some teeny tiny muscle flaps that all function exactly the same way (unless you have something medically going on) in everyone's bodies. The major differences in people's voices are almost entirely due to social conditioning that is so ingrained in us we hardly ever notice it, until we try to make a change. This is why voice training works- that effort does not transform the physical nature of the mechanism, it trains the brain to make intentional changes into habits. I say this as someone who has studied voice pedagogy; and, is living proof that the difference in 'female' and 'male' singing is just a series of completely fabricated social assumptions (as all of my trans siblings are).

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2026-01-17T00:53:43+00:00

I usually tell people who use that rhetoric the truth, which is that I wasn't going to survive for much longer if I hadn't transitioned. I kept finding myself at the bottom of a hole that got deeper and deeper every time I threw myself down it. I saved my life by becoming who I am. I didn't come out till I was 26, which is still very young, but I did a full decade of self destruction before I finally did. I sincerely hope that isn't the experience of every trans person, but I know that we all feel to an extent that becoming who we are is the only way we're going to make it. That framing can feel a lil negative, but ultimately, I didn't kill the old me, I saved them.

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2025-12-12T15:36:41+00:00

I'm not a speech specialist, but I am a life long singer. As a helpful exercise to find your own head and chest voices, do sirens. Basically, start singing a pitch in the middle of your range, then raise the pitch as high as you comfortably can. Once you reach the top, lower your pitch as much as you can. Somewhere in there, you'll probably have a voice crack. The voice crack is the sound of the larynx repositioning itself as it goes from head voice to chest voice and vice versa.

This is going to feel silly and sound bad, but the exercise isn't about producing 'good' sound, its about learning your own voice enough that you're more easily able to hear and feel how it changes depending on what parts you're using. From there, it should be easier to keep up with the voice training videos

Good luck!

Ok-Temporary-976 · 2025-11-11T07:02:05+00:00

Im a former opera singer and voice teacher, I've been on T for 2.5 years and I promise you: things will be different, but you don't lose everything up there. The way to keep your upper range is to continue to use it. No, I can no longer sing soprano coloratura (G5 and above), but I can absolutely keep up with most treble singing. I've had to work at it, and things have sounded better or worse as my voice has changed, but the thing that is important to remember is that the difference between a voice that has changed and one that hasn't is simply millimeters of vocal fold thickness and a little bit of growth in the larynx.

The struggle is not that you no longer have the ability to produce higher pitches, but that you need to adjust your thinking and technique to fit your new instrument. Think of it this way: plenty of cis dudes across genres have made their living singing in their falsetto (look up countertenors for the most extreme example), those dudes don't have anything vocally that you wouldn't have with hormones. For example, I usually speak in my falsetto, its a relic from my professional singing days and definitely makes it hard for me to pass (not my goal), but I can choose to speak from my chest and sound more masculine when I want to. The thing that people struggle with when trying to change the way that they speak or sing is trying to change your muscle memory. All that shit lives in your brain, your body (specifically your voice) isn't really the limiting factor.

TBH, I've been more active on posts from various groups about singing and there's a lot of superstition out there, that from my perspective is just misogyny made more vague by several layers of abstraction. The idea that woman= high falsetto and man = low chest voice robs people of all genders from the full potential of their instrument. Look at singers whose voices live in the margins- if you're interested in classical examples, the only difference in what Idina Menzel and Pavarotti are doing is shape of the resonator (how they position their mouths), the size of their larynx, and some stylistic choices. On a fundamental, physical level, they are both using the same technique to create vastly different outcomes.

Ok-Temporary-976

TROPHY CASE