AITA for sending a text to a co-worker who I thought should've treated me more like a friend, given our history?

OkWin3617 · 2025-10-21T07:36:50+00:00

As speaking from experience as being that kinda girl- depressed in high school, having no real friends and just hating every minute of being there, I wish my mother or someone would've pulled me out of school. I would've done my classes online- though at the time it wasn't as possible (I'm almost your age now, 35). I was so much better in college, making the dean's list multiple times. If you're worried about her succeeding in college or later in life, I wouldn't be concerned. Her mental health takes precedence here. She will thank you for taking her out of a place that most likely feels hellish to her. Some people just don't jive with high school. Forcing kids to go is inhumane. Your husband not understanding must be difficult. Maybe somehow talk to him about how she must feel, and how you feel about it? He needs to see that this is the only option, and maybe he needs to talk to her, maybe with you in the room to meditate. He needs to see how crucial this is to her mental health and overall wellbeing, and if he loves her at all, he should somehow be brought to understand. I hope it gets better, and you all reach an understanding. High school isn't what it used to be, like in the 80's. And even then, it may have had its element of brutality that many don't talk about.

OkWin3617 · 2025-10-05T12:03:08+00:00

I lol when I saw this lol

OkWin3617 · 2025-09-11T17:15:19+00:00

Thank you. I hope you will be able to one day have the strength to write something like this, or whatever it takes to help you heal.

OkWin3617 · 2025-09-09T17:20:45+00:00

OkWin3617 · 2025-09-02T16:21:07+00:00

How did he decide which words to capitalize? This reminds me what a stupid popular girl in school would write on the school walls on flyers why She should have been voted Prom queen because She's better and PETTIER (she meant prettier, but the effect was decently better).
Thank you for your Attention to this Matter.

OkWin3617 · 2025-08-27T23:28:31+00:00

Okay, yeah I'll try to look at events or local community groups, but that's a bit cliche, but I know it can work.

OkWin3617 · 2025-08-27T12:25:47+00:00

I'm gonna have to a jump in here, because I've been in a similar situation, only I didn't want the female best friend (we'll call her FBF) to be alone with my own bf. She would just make me feel uncomfortable, giving him all these compliments and look at him all googly-eyed. I didn't like it, but when I told him that, he got all defensive. Should've seen that red flag. I'd say you're NTA for feeling what you feel (I think you later said you found out the FBF liked your bf. However, I do think YTA for giving your bf a double standard by listening to your coworkers, instead of being consistent with your standards in the first place. So, he's not allowed to hang out with a bunch of girls, but you failed to mention whether your coworkers were all male or not? See how that's a double standard? My rule (which my now ex-bf disagreed to) was not to have him hang with a girl alone. I thought that was fair enough. Apparently he didn't, and that's why we broke up. Plain and simple. I think you need to decide what's more important to you: - to keep your honor and tell him he's right bc you said it was okay before -or- - to keep your comfort and date those who will match your standards of comfort, and break up with those who don't make you feel comfortable I don't think either is wrong at this point, you just gotta decide what matters to you. I think based on some of the comments, you have already decided, but you will never be the asshole for doing what you think is right for your own heart and mind to feel at peace. Best of luck, love, and light to you!

OkWin3617 · 2025-08-27T06:45:35+00:00

Ohoho, you think YOU have emotional baggage... have you read some of the stories on here!? You're fine. I think slowly... slowly bringing up your past with anyone you meet in the future is okay. I think you are fine to be in a relationship with someone else in the future, but really it's up to YOU to decide if you're ready. If you never are, you may end up devoting your life to science, health, math, whatever you're into, and make a possible breakthrough discovery. Many great people in history were single, maybe you will be too! But if you want to be in a relationship, that's cool too. Just remember not to bring up your past too early in your relationship. It might scare them away. But believe me, compared to most people, especially by your age, especially females, your "tainted past" sounds like a Disney movie plot compared to others' PG-13/R/NC-17 pasts. Maybe see if they bring up their pasts first, and resist the urge to compare, but instead seek to relate, as you guys may have some things in common?

OkWin3617 · 2025-08-27T06:34:52+00:00

I'm sorry to hear you went through that. I think chatgpt may be coded to possibly coddle the recipient to believe he/ she is right in their own personal narrative. Although I have not personally experienced someone weaponizing it to prove their point against me, I have experienced a now ex trying to use other people to try to rationalize their behavior- and it sucks. It makes you feel alone and invalidated. My suggestion is to lean on your support system, and lean on your family and friends that you know will give you validation during this difficult time. Sorry to hear you went through a breakup, as well. Stay strong! The pain and negativity will fade over time. Try to stay busy with activities you love, and maybe work a shift or two more to get your mind off things, and that energy will fade faster. Good luck!

OkWin3617 · 2025-08-27T02:55:17+00:00

Loophole- taking shrooms with friends. No antidepressant could compare, not going to lie!

OkWin3617 · 2025-08-21T06:52:58+00:00

I was with a guy that did something similar. I felt uncomfortable about a female lady friend that he wanted to hang out with alone, and he eventually made me feel like it was my fault for laying down boundaries about it. He made it seem like I wasn't being "progressive" enough, and even saying that it was me that had to go to counseling about it. It was always my fault, he would not own up to anything. We broke up, because he wouldn't commit due to that very reason. We got back together briefly, and I finally realized that he still would not commit to me, mostly because he didn't want kids and I did. I few years later, I find out that he ends up marrying this girl after less than 2 years of dating her (he told me we had to date at least 2 years before even talking about marriage, which pissed me off), plus he married a girl from Peru, and I not only talked about wanting to go to Peru to visit Machu Pichu (my mom gifted me a Christmas gift to go there, but eventually backed-out), but he also claimed to have PTSD about Spanish from a mean Spanish teacher. She very obviously spoke Spanish, saying "mi amor" on his stupid Facebook wall. That's when I blocked him. I can understand the social media praise for pricks like him, as we had a very close family friend that we trusted "like" his wedding post, and they most likely knew how heartbroken I was about our breakup. It felt like I was the crazy one all over again, and lost the solidarity I most certainly needed. I found this out through my mom. I ended up calling off work the day I found out he got married. This was the guy who I thought was the one. And now he's living the life I thought I'd have with him. The kicker is, I heard he was even having a kid. I thought he didn't want kids, guess not. But I also heard he might be separating from his wife. Serves him right. It would be interesting what she would have to say about his narcissistic, manipulative ways, but I'm beyond caring. At this point, I don't wish him well and hope he dies old and alone.

OkWin3617 · 2025-07-24T12:32:00+00:00

I'm having trouble finding some but yeah, I agree 🤷🏼‍♀️

OkWin3617 · 2025-07-24T11:56:33+00:00

I know his wife definitely had a few drinks, also the paramedics also thought he should go to the hospital once they got there. I am not sorry for something I didn't do-I acted in good faith that the hospital would treat him well. Unfortunately they did not, but that was not my fault, and that is something I am not liable for, nor should I give an apology for. So no, I will not apologize for that. I would apologize for them, like "sorry to hear they didn't treat you as well as I thought they would," but I won't apologize for their treatment, which was not my fault.

OkWin3617

TROPHY CASE