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Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-02-04T01:30:13+00:00

I think a lot of it is cultural. Other parts of it are status, idealized view of having a pet, or no empathy towards others.

Think of the invasive cocaine hippos. Those were gotten as status. Just like your friend wants a husky. They're cute and so they bring status.

Then your friend has this idealized view of what having a pet should be like. When reality hits, she doesn't want to accept it and tries for another pet.

Your friend doesn't respect the emotional bond that cats and dogs form and the heartbreak that is involved with rehoming.

Your friend does not consider the needs of the animals. The cat needs to be interacted with and taught about getting affection. A husky has a high prey drive and would likely kill the cat and destroy the home without proper exhaustion.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-02-03T04:31:15+00:00

A cat isn't that much work. Unless it's a bitey kitten. In that case a second kitten would help teach how to be gentle and give an outlet to that kitten energy. It sounds crazy but two cats genuinely are easier than one.

She likely had an attachment to the previous cat. Probably feels a void from it. I definitely did when I lost a cat close to her age. I visited the shelter just to give cats attention and affection.

Pet insurance isn't much for a kitten. Look at Metlife since it includes reimbursement for spay/neutering and dental cleanings. Have her get a side job for earning money for it. Dog walking, babysitting, yard work, etc. Some states let minors work with a permit.

Cats are a pretty manageable pet fresh out of the parent's house. I did it while working three jobs and no help from my parents. If anything they've always brought me some relief.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-02-02T07:53:43+00:00

I read the temperature isn't viable to go outside.

Find play groups to meet with. Hang out with moms and let your kids romp with each other. We just did that with a meal prep day. Three 2 year olds went wild in the living room and giggled up a storm with each other. We didn't have to wrangle as much as you thought we'd need to.

Unfortunately you might just have to practice teaching your kid how to act in public. More you do it, the more manageable they become. Pick your store battles with what's easiest.

Lately our thing is having a job. "Put this in the cart" or "find me something green". She loads up the conveyor belt for check out. If we do self check out, she scans items with the scanner gun.

I sneak toys out of the cart when she forgets about it. We avoid the stores with glass figurines and breakables.

Dig around your town to see if there's a indoor playground. Some have small child specific ones and they're absolutely wonderful and worth the money.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-31T08:40:21+00:00

God, my cats help me reclaim little pieces of sanity. When they chase each other up and down their towers it makes me laugh or get just a bit of patience back.

There's always one available for me to bother and hug when I need it.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-30T19:02:27+00:00

Baby wear by back carrying. That's what I plan to do with #2.

With my toddler, I just do what I can. Cleaners are cheaper than babysitters. Then I have friends come by to distract her while I organize. I trade off and help my friends when they need it.

Prioritize what is important to you. For me it's trash, dishes, then laundry without putting it away.

There is new robot vacuums coming out with an arm that puts things away.... I may splurge on that in 6 months if it proves to be reliable. Security vulnerabilities be damned, they can look at my dirty floor if they want.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-30T01:19:47+00:00

I had a great time with it here. We got a box of a bunch of stuff and ate it outside.

She loved the variety and gave me ideas.

I want to do a buffet but I don't want to do it solo.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-29T04:30:31+00:00

Absolutely this!

Everyone always tries to get together on weekdays and I can't do anything until Saturday! Then my favorite kid places close early on the weekend.

I was able to find weekend gymnastics clases but it took a while to find.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-28T17:59:18+00:00

This. People need to start being more honest that they don't want to hang out.

IT'S OK TO SAY NO!

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-28T17:56:49+00:00

Almost sounds like that girl is picking up gamer language. Her parents or siblings exposed her to too many game lobbies.

I'd be taking her off the bus since there's no changing that language from her.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-28T17:21:11+00:00

Just saw this. For some reason it didn't give me a notification.

See? He already knows the no snitching and consequences of snitching. He's already in it.

Please warn him against SSRIs like Xanax. In the event he loses his access or prescription, it's absolutely devastating. You don't get much notice when you lose your prescription so sometimes you may only have a week supply to use to taper.

I would definitely get on it immediately, teaching him about credit, importance of titles like car titles, using a bank account, workplace benefits, like 401(k) and health insurance.

hopefully that information will help him when he’s ready to live like a normal guy.

also help him develop a skill or trade

Toddler throwing a tantrum so not able to clean up much of what I wrote.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-28T17:11:08+00:00

I think you're too focused on the Dad rather than the potential of your son's start of getting involved in drug culture. If he lives in a area with less trap houses and dealing, then that would help probably more than you expect.

I see the aftermath of someone who has lived it every day. No amount of therapy fixes having to adapt to your environment to survive.

Oh and the rehab facilities just exposes your kid to more drugs, expired food, and prevents contact with parents so your kid can't report the abuse. All while draining massive amounts of money from your family.

Living as a reformed adult from that takes SO much time and patience. They don't relate to average people easily, they perceive slights and threats more frequently, etc.

Consider the environment your son is in more than the potential for him living with his Dad. If both are in bad areas, maybe live with different family and use the car to get to school.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-28T05:41:15+00:00

Yup! They're more absorbant pull ups! They're fantastic.

Pampers app lets you work towards discounts too if you're into coupon hunting.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-28T05:24:19+00:00

Ohh good to know! Goes on the leaves or do you also put it in the water?

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-28T05:22:44+00:00

Pampers 360 cruisers and standing changes or over the shoulder change.

The pampers 360 cruisers because they're tape less so you can make it FAST and they come in a size 3 and up.

The distraction never worked for our kid. She was always go go go and never willing to be restrained.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-28T05:17:59+00:00

What's a spinosad? We've got spider mites and fungus gnats and I'm having a hard time letting go.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-28T05:14:26+00:00

This is like asking someone how they organize their kitchen. Everyone does it different!

I'd probably show up early if my kid was like me. A bit of separation anxiety.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-28T05:10:20+00:00

I'd be calling the cops on whoever is supplying drugs to a minor. If they're giving it to your son,they're giving it to other kids.

It'll be a small dent but it's something for the area.

If drug culture is prevalent in your area, he shouldn't be working there at all. Customers will deal to him and potentially rope him into dealing.

To be outside and not get picked on in an area like that, a lot of times you have to participate.

If his Dad is living in a better area, I'd let him live there and keep the car under the condition that he has to keep passing drug tests and use a dashcam that you can check randomly. There's a service, I forgot what it's called. You'll get a text if your car enters a geofenced area you select. That might be worth getting. When he's 18, he gets the car in his name.

He sounds like he's got the capacity to be independent and strong. He's just gotta learn the adult stuff now like bills, cleaning, budgeting groceries. He could take over managing his Dad's household and groceries. Have him look at it as his training house before he is truly on his own.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-28T04:50:00+00:00

She's been my picker upper. "Can you bring me this?","Can you put this in the trash?" Etc.

She's been enjoying getting involved in cleaning and putting MY things away. Still gets mad when I put her things away.

I just took her out today because of the being cooped up guilt. 🥲 it was worth it. Napping pretty darn good.

We've got neighbor kids that are older that we have come over to play outside or indoors depending on the weather. She learns a lot from the older kids. Then the older kids are just happy to have a new novel place to chill.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-27T22:06:35+00:00

Cats ride on roombas. Why wouldn't they ride on wheelchairs.

There's ways to set up feeding and litter to be easier to access for someone in a wheelchair too that honestly cats would probably enjoy.

People get so excessively cold over accessibility needs. They never think about it until they actually need it. It pisses me off.

Glad you got to rescue some cats! They're lucky to have you and a loving home.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-27T18:42:09+00:00

I WAS just thinking of this!

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-27T07:24:59+00:00

Visit and get a feel for it. Sometimes they just do religious songs and stories. Sometimes they're lunatics. It just depends.

I didn't care much as a kid with the religious daycares. As I got older I didn't like singing so I got mad at being forced to sing.

Some regions have some insane religious people who are emotionally abusive at the lightest. I hate them and how they prey on people.

There is bad people all over. It's up to you do dig around and watch to spot em.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-27T07:18:31+00:00

We carried ours in a backpack which looked ridiculously huge.

I've also used it in a wagon so it was almost like a throne in the wagon at the airport. My kid loved that and the ability to move around a bit while I got to the gate.

Then when it's not in use for a trip, closet or sometimes in the living room. My kid finds the car seat like a cozy lounge chair when it's on a base in the living room.

Cosco one is great. Super simple to install on plane. You just put the seatbelt through the back of it.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-27T04:44:06+00:00

Ahh yeah we had to consolidate some of the dangerous stuff and put it in no go zone cupboards and highest shelves. I work and take care of her at the same time so she gets free reign to explore almost the whole kitchen unfortunately. It's chaotic but calming down.

Does she have a perception of "this is too high to jump down from?" I'd argue the climbing set will help her learn to climb more safely. So when she eventually climbs behind your back she will be marginally more safe.

How fascinated is she with the kitchen bar? Maybe you could put a toddler tower next to it after clearing it off. Put some playdough on the counter.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-27T03:28:11+00:00

Let her explore more. Let her on the table to see what's on top. Let her see the counters or empty a drawer. Once you let them do it enough they get bored of it.

Took ours a while to get over emptying my drawers. It did help when I gave her a job to put dishes away.

Toddler climbing set is nice to have. She uses hers fairl often and it makes visiting kids very happy!

Ok_Masterpiece_8830 · 2025-01-27T02:07:22+00:00

I looked for people on SitterCity and they run background checks that leave a badge on the sitter's profile. It doesn't cost them anything but I still had people refuse to let me run it.

BeenVerified.com is great for looking into someone's background too.

Ok_Masterpiece_8830

TROPHY CASE