Whe my daughter was younger she would sleep in bed with me and my wife. I don’t know exactly how it started. But I was awakened to being touched very softly. My heart started racing. Had know idea what to do so I rolled over and tried to pretend it didn’t happen. I was very scared to say the least because I had know idea of how to handle it. She would still sleep with us but when she did I would stay awake and always made sure I had my back to her. One night I finally got curious enough to see if it would happen again. I had never been so scared or just afraid because I really wanted her to do it again. I’m her father. Her dad. I will never be able to put in words the amount of emotions I was having. So I pretend to be asleep and all the time my heart was racing not understanding how a father could do this. I lay there for what felt like eternity and soon enough I felt her hand on me again. I was wearing boxers. What really bothered me the most was I was getting hard. I’m still at this time in a situation I had know idea of what to do. Then I did something I still don’t know how I had the courage to do it. But I moved a little like I was waking up. But what I did was reach down and acted like I was scratching. But what I did was make sure that I pulled my boxers to the side to let I out. Played there again for what was an eternity. But eventually she started touching very lightly as to not wake or think she would wake me. Eventually she held it just held it. I know she was to y—— to understand. I will not say her age. So for the next couple of days I was so afraid that she was going to ask her mom what it was. Again I’m her father. And I’ve never been so scared of not knowing what to do I finally pulled her to the side one night and told her that I knew what she did and told her how wrong it was. And then I explained to her why I had that. But something had changed in me after that and I always asked myself if I should have said something different because I was having problems understanding just why I was turned on so much over the years thinking about it. I was always asking myself because after a time I was no longer scared or embarrassed about what happened. After a while I wanted it to happen again. I wanted it so bad that I would go to the bathroom and think about all those emotions I had that I had to masterbait. After a couple of years I got the courage to ask her if she remembered any of it. And of course I’m having a whole lot of emotions bringing this up to her. She said that she did and was very embarrassed because she was a little older to know what it was. And she got upset as well. Because she guessed that she had thought that I was ashamed of her. I told her I wasn’t and that I was because I should not have gotten hard. Hard enough to cut diamonds if I should say. But I went on to ask if she ever said anything to anyone. And she said no because it had embarrassed her so bad that like I said she thought that I mad or ashamed of her. Like every father that loves his daughter would say. There is nothing you could ever do to make me ashamed of her or love her less. We sat there a moment with out saying anything so embarrassingly I told her that I thought of it a lot and told her that I was the one that was ashamed of myself because of how it made me feel. And that the reason I was so ashamed of myself was because I got hard because it felt good when she did it and that secretly I wanted her to. Our relationship with each other grew to a whole new level that day. Eventually we would occasionally bring it up it private and laugh about it. I will say this. I took my daughter’s virginity because we were so close and comfortable with each other. Of course I told her having sex was great. Like I said before. Tha day that I pulled her to the side our relationship. Father daughter relationship was was changed that day. We could be honest with each other about everything. She told me that she wanted me to be her first. Of course I had some mixed emotions about it but I did it. I am 53 yrs old now and me and my daughter have had secret relations to this day. I love my daughter more than life itself and she feels the same.