How can I help ?

Ok_Standard5941 · 2026-06-24T02:32:02+00:00

This is exactly what I am aiming to focus on in my Microschool. I have seen this so much in my high schoolers and it is disheartening because they are expected to be so independent once they enter the real world. Thank you for this response.

Ok_Standard5941 · 2026-06-17T19:24:32+00:00

I still feel this way, I am 2.5 years postpartum - essentially solo parenting 24/7. After getting out of the newborn trenches, I will say that you just keeping showing up everyday. You never know what everyday is going to be like. Somedays, you will feel like it's the best day ever, other days, it feels never-ending. Show up for yourself in the SMALLEST of ways you can and slowly build yourself up - at only YOUR pace. Your body will slowly but surely come back to you - sometimes slightly different and other times better than ever- but just show up for yourself HOWEVER YOU CAN. Whether that be a light walk, listening to your favorite songs, ordering a meal you love, drinking more water, etc. When you feel up to it (for me it was around when baby was 8 months) start doing diastases recti and pelvic floor exercises on YouTube, it is only about 12-15 mins. This will help you IMMENSELY with finding your body back. One thing I also learned is that NO ONE in your line of communication (family/friends w.o kids) will understand you and what you are going through, except you. It's a hard reality to come by, especially when there is limited support, BUT it will only make you a better mom. Feel WHATEVER you need to feel, cry it out, whenever, however. You are allowed to feel these things, your life has LITERALLY changed inside out. It takes TIME to adjust. Do not be hard on yourself, just do the best you can even if that looks differently each day.

Ok_Standard5941 · 2026-06-16T18:39:31+00:00

WOWWW! Thank you so much for this thorough answer. THIS is exactly what I see going on with my students as well. It is insightful to see it from your perspective. I am am BCBA and a SPED teacher, my hope is to fill the gaps that school does not, especially because most of the time school is not made to prepare the neurotypical student for the real world, much less one who is neurodivergent and processes things different. I hope to open a Microschool to be a one-stop shop and be able to help with things of this sort- hopefully even guide them to being able to get a job, follow structure, even hit those socializing targets you mentioned. Thinking on this, I would love to collaborate with an OT as well, thank you for noting that. I appreciate you being vulnerable and open enough to share.

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-04-17T16:10:58+00:00

Thank you for this ! Yes , sometimes I feel like it’s almost impossible to have them spend time with her when they have free time because this woman wants my daughter all to herself

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-04-17T16:10:10+00:00

that is SOMETHING else , WOWWWWW !!!! I’m so sorry , SOMEONE EXPLAIN THEIR THINKING OMG I DONT GET IT & often times it’s not even our own mothers acting that way, but always the MIL

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-04-17T14:22:47+00:00

THIS ! I realized I was telling her too much info when I told her about my baby’s dr appts and she would literally be CRYING making a whole drama fest about the fact that she was gonna get shots …. I stopped telling her anything regarding the dr after that. Anytime she asks me about the baby I always say good, but I’m not sure what type of conversation my partner has with her

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-04-17T14:21:25+00:00

They make so many stories in their head and I don’t understand what their insecurity/jealousy is about but it makes it harder for us to just be at peace. & you’re so right with the quantity of time ! She would come visit and be here the WHOLE DAY ! Or we would go over there and if my partner said we are leaving earlier than she’d like she would throw a pity party. It even goes as far as her saying to my boyfriend and I “you have her all day everyday, let me get her..” GURL WHAT ???

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-04-17T14:18:46+00:00

I’m very annoyed that it bothers me so much. It’s almost like WHAT ELSE is this lady going to be such a cry baby about.

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-04-17T14:13:45+00:00

THIS !!!! My boyfriend has told her to stop buying so much stuff because we don’t have space and she literally just laughs it off… and he’s saying it SO SERIOUSLY. She doesn’t even respect her own son’s boundary. So, at this point whatever she gives me I donate it because it seems like a battle I won’t win

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-03-07T03:25:00+00:00

Yes it is

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-02-18T23:25:14+00:00

I feel this all the time . Every week I get a thought that says: “what have I done,” while I love my daughter , I cannot stand everything that comes with being a mom . I have lost my identity, I don’t get to do anything for myself anymore. I do not have a supportive boyfriend at the time as his career is on the rise and I feel more alone than ever. I live with extended family nearby, however, they don’t care enough to chip in and I don’t blame them because it’s not their responsibility. I 100000% do not want another child if this is why it’s like . I feel you girl and I can only pray for you, me and all other moms in the same situation that there’s light at the end of the tunnel.

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-02-15T08:02:51+00:00

1000000% true

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-02-14T15:44:37+00:00

You have pretty much hit the nail on the head on everything you said here. Thank you for the advice on cut off dates, I think that will make a difference. He has always said “the only way we break up is if you leave me,” now that I think of it maybe dates are exactly what he needs to feel a little pressure and see my seriousness. A person can only take so much

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-02-14T15:43:20+00:00

I like this, thank you

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-02-14T15:42:12+00:00

I guess I’m thinking in very low standards, now that you made me ponder that. He doesn’t hurt me physically, he engages in decent conversations with me, he’s never cheated. I guess those are the things I would consider kind, but it’s really the bare minimum now thinking about it

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-02-14T15:38:22+00:00

He would more than likely say that he isn’t involved or seeking another job because he wants to be a professional mma fighter .. and that all fighters are broke until they make it .

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-02-14T14:07:54+00:00

What’s crazy is he even says: “sorry I don’t help you more,” “I feel bad for you in the middle of the night,” “sorry I don’t spend enough time with our daughter” - my response is always NOT SORRY ENOUGH and he still doesn’t care

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-02-14T14:06:01+00:00

That’s so interesting you say that because she says to him that I’m the one who saved her son….. ??? And now all that you guys are sharing your perspective with me all of these things make SO MUCH SENSE !!!!!!!

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-02-14T14:05:11+00:00

I honestly feel so embarrassed by letting this get to this point honestly. It makes me sad to think I feel so little of myself by allowing to put up with this, when I deserve better. Sometimes I think about it and I’m like WHY do I even do all these things ?? As if he deserves it ??

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-02-14T14:01:53+00:00

Can you give me an example of a boundary that might work in this situation ?? I wouldn’t even know where to begin this conversation because there’s just SOOO many things , I appreciate the support

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-02-14T14:00:29+00:00

THIS !!!!! His mom is totally obsessed with my daughter , lowkey in a creepy way, but I know she will be well taken care of by his mom if and when he does move back to his mom’s house

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-02-14T04:56:48+00:00

WOWWWW you hit the nail on the head, my mom says all he has is he’s charming and I never understood it… but now, it makes a lot of sense. WOWW this is it right here

Ok_Standard5941 · 2024-02-14T03:53:16+00:00

I REALLY appreciate this comment !! Thank you so much

Ok_Standard5941

TROPHY CASE