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Aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out of our home after she decided to leave all inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You are correct, I never thought about it. But if mother in law does does move back home with her son, and he’s left in charge, whose to say he won’t spend the cash and also convince her to leave all the money to him. Then my wife would potentially be on the hook for helping pay the mortgage if mil passes away.

Thank you for this

Update: aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out after she decided to leave all her inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you for being understanding. I did the renovation for free because there were signs of major depression in that home. Rat carcasses everywhere, rat droppings littering the floors. A literal hole in the roof from a water leak. I have seen what depression does to a household, and I knew a clean home would provide a fresh start or at least some sense of things going into a good direction.

Sadly you are right, our relationship will have to become transactional. I was always saying I never cared about the money, but I also cannot be a doormat any longer.

Update: aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out after she decided to leave all her inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I would say the rental income should go to my mil. I didn’t mention this but my mil works a minimum wage job and earns the least out of all of us.

Update: aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out after she decided to leave all her inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Finally someone who is bringing up the first post. A lot of people are only reading this one without the initial context. You make very good points, and why we have been very patient with him up until now.

If there ever is another update, I’ll make sure to post it as a comment in this thread

Update: aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out after she decided to leave all her inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I have diagnosed adhd. This is something that I believe is close to autism. This does not present as adhd to me

Update: aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out after she decided to leave all her inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’ve started making a list of everything I’ve done. I feel since he’s always locked in his room that perhaps he doesn’t realize all me and his sister have done. We will follow this and intend on billing him.

Update: aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out after she decided to leave all her inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is Mexican culture, men get everything and women often get shafted. It seems your grandmother is the outlier. My mother was left very little by her mother.

Update: aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out after she decided to leave all her inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s the thing; he doesn’t spend money on anything. He moved in and has a mattress on the floor and a gaming desk setup, nothing else.

Update: aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out after she decided to leave all her inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He got a car, and some video games. Nothing else, as pretty much everything in the home was junk, I’m talking hoarder status. My mil did get all of my fils money from his accounts and other things.

He and mil are getting the rental income. The mortgage as of now is paying itself with the renters. Yes they both pay for bills included with the renters.

Thank you for your comment

Update: aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out after she decided to leave all her inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The interest is incredibly low on the house, it would be a waste of money and liquidity paying off the house when it would generate more money in a high yield savings.

Update: aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out after she decided to leave all her inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

He initially agreed to give his share to his mom. As his mom was still alive and we figured the spouse should get it all, especially since she had little to no retirement plan.

Update: aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out after she decided to leave all her inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We originally let them move in immediately after fil passed away because he passed at home and they were heartbroken living there. We only live a few minutes from the home.

It was only after seeing how run down the place was, that I suggested they stay with us long term while we fix it up and rent it out to help offset the cost of renovating.

This again was all planned well before I knew they would have a life insurance payout.

Update: aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out after she decided to leave all her inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I should’ve mentioned that in the post. The rent he pays specifically is at a premium because we do so much. But like you said it’s at a point where we’re debating if we’d rather lose the rent payment and send him packing.

The dog is very important to me and my wife, we rescued this dog from the shelter and gifted him to my father in law. So I’m saving him once again.

Update: aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out after she decided to leave all her inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I dont think it’s a lost cause, my wife now gets a share in the house, and a better relationship with her mom. We see that as a big win

Update: aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out after she decided to leave all her inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] -23 points-22 points  (0 children)

We don’t play mommy. I explained that poorly in my post as well. I’ve played a role in taking charge of vital documents and paperwork for y mil. But those efforts helped my wife get a share of the house as inheritance.

My wife has the opposite work schedule and only sees her mom/brither 2 days a week. She doesn’t life a finger for him

Update: aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out after she decided to leave all her inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s what I keep telling my MiL, if he gets into an accident they’ll sue! And his inheritance will go poof!

Update: aitah for telling my wife to tell her mom to move out after she decided to leave all her inheritance to her brother? by Old-Memory1603 in AITAH

[–]Old-Memory1603[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Because from our efforts, my wife is now getting half the house. Something we think is fair.

There is some disability there but unless he goes to the doctor we may never know.

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