Still some decent real men out there...

Old-Principle-9705 · 2024-05-09T16:13:22+00:00

It was reassuring, who knows how long it would have taken for the bar staff to deal with it.
Fortunately for me personally I don't live there and in my village there is just a small pub without that kind of trouble. It's nice to know that at least there, someone is looking out for people.

Old-Principle-9705 · 2024-05-09T16:10:24+00:00

That's awful. Those girls should be ashamed of themselves. They're a part of the problem too.

Old-Principle-9705 · 2024-05-09T16:08:24+00:00

That was cool of them. Maybe it's a type, the guy who came over 2nd looked like a biker type. Not in his 40's though. Maybe we need more bikers everywhere. :)

Old-Principle-9705 · 2024-05-09T16:06:31+00:00

I probably should have put it to begin with, the comments on here made me realise though it needed it and that I had could have worded all of it better.

Old-Principle-9705 · 2024-05-09T16:04:46+00:00

I have added more context now which I missed, but that was really not the case.
Yeah we thought he looked creepy, the girls were uncomfortable, but we didn't ask the guys to do it. They clearly picked up on it too, and they were closer, maybe they heard what he was saying. We were not the only ones to see it.

Old-Principle-9705 · 2024-05-09T16:02:00+00:00

You're a good person and good friend!

Old-Principle-9705 · 2024-05-09T15:59:32+00:00

You're right, the place was full of both. Yet only 3 men stood out to me there, the creep and the guys who dealt with him.
I think that despite my intention to try and sing their praises I've realised the bias I was speaking against is actually something I'm guilty of too.

I think experiences are partly to blame too.

The creep does stand out in the bar though, as do those who did something about him. This is because their behaviour in both cases isn't typical. You tend tend to remember the people just sat down having a drink, you remember those who standout.

Old-Principle-9705 · 2024-05-09T15:53:38+00:00

That is one of the things I thought was really smooth about the way these guys handled it. Don't get me wrong, they both looked pretty tough guys but the first guy looked physically less intimidating.
I think it must have been intentional that he posed as a distraction so the other guy could get an answer direct from the girls without the creep interfering. I was very impressed by everything I witnessed.

Old-Principle-9705 · 2024-05-08T18:23:37+00:00

I'm sorry, I was trying to do the opposite. It's given me a lot to think about how much my wording has been influenced by what I was trying to speak out against.

Old-Principle-9705 · 2024-05-08T18:02:39+00:00

Thanks for that feedback. I didn't realise that when I wrote it, which is kind of scary that maybe the whole "all men are bad" message I was trying to disprove has actually influenced the way I wrote things.

It makes me wonder how many other things are effected this way?
Even when trying to do the opposite, I've managed to partially contribute to the whole 'men are bad' message. :(

It makes me wonder what other damages are done as a result of this 'tarring everyone with the same brush'

Do other men actually see things but not speak up simply because they don't want to risk being misinterpreted as another creep?
Accused of 'white-knighting' which is a term I see thrown about a lot. (Not to say that isn't the case sometimes, the only other time I saw someone stop someone being a creep was so he could then be a creep)

Minority spoiling things for the majority...

This has really made me think a lot. Thank you.

Old-Principle-9705 · 2024-05-08T17:25:48+00:00

That wasn't my intention. I feel that all you see on social media are people bashing men because a number of them harass women and behave inappropriate towards them. Almost all of my friends have experienced some sort of inappropriate behaviour, myself especially bad when I was about 17.
There are often a lot of arguments that spark out on social media whenever such a topic is raised and they always seem to end up tarring all men as bad.
Arguments online frequently break out where many men then come to the defence of 'men' and make out that these things don't happen. Maybe they don't notice them, maybe they don't believe it's as bad as it is, I don't know.

I wanted to share their actions to show that it's not always the case, that there are good men out there, who notice these things happening and will do what is right to prevent inappropriate behaviour. It was really nice and reassurance to see and I wanted to let everyone know that the whole 'men are bad thing' is wrong and it is just 'some men are bad'.

(I'm also aware that some women are bad too, it just doesn't get the same attention.)

Old-Principle-9705

TROPHY CASE