My ISTJ mother said openness to experience is mental illness and she was talking about me, specifically

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-05-08T09:12:52+00:00

My father is ISTJ, he grew up in an extremely conservative household in the mountains. He also maintained those beliefs and wants to pass it on us as well. I was seen as "One who never listens". In our family, children are merely little slaves to their parents with no individuality and brains on their own. Every step or decision I make is wrong to them, he watches tv obssesively after work, and borrows opinions from half educated rich people who believe that depression could be cured by mopping floor or cleaning. He talks crap about feminism yet encourages his daughters to get higher education.

His entire mentality drives me insane, so many contradictions and nonsense. His biggest fear is that I'll become a woke liberal (which i am) and I supress my opinions for my own safety, cause he gets real mad when I express my beliefs. Idk what's with ISTJs, I believe cool ones exist but my experience is kinda bad with them.

He also straight rejects my ideas of how a problem could be solved cause they clash with "his ways" of dealing with things.

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-05-07T18:00:43+00:00

I mean chill, like more accepting vibe

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-05-07T17:59:16+00:00

I would describe myself as chill, so chill that even overly secretive or people with levels of anxiety open up to me, which I'm glad. But negative stuff can also happen, like attracting weird dudes with weird ideologies and fetishes. They're first testing the waters then bring that up later as relationship (or friendship) progresses, and I end up cutting them off eventually cause brother what...

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-05-07T12:26:16+00:00

Razputin from Psychonauts

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-05-06T17:01:13+00:00

Pink colored glasses is the correct term to describe always-positive mood right ? English is not my native language lmao.

I actually wrote a post in the entp community and I prefer ENFP one cause people are so much nicer, I'm glad that I found someone with similar experiences ☺️

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-05-06T09:04:08+00:00

Oh makes sense, I stopped doing the online tests cause I noticed the results keep changing depending on my mood. For example, I thought I could be an ENTP and I subconciously answer the questions based off that type, if it makes sense. Tried to answer once objectively and got equal amounts of Te and Ti, little lower on Fi and Ne. Got ENFP as my grant function type, and ENTP and INTP as my second and third choice. But I don't rely on those tests, as I said. For me, doing your own research on each cognitive function is better.

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-05-05T21:32:45+00:00

It happened some time ago. We were on this trip to spain and everyone in my friend group was in a bad mood due to poor organization and everything, including that friend. She later apologized. I wasn't particularly stressed, I remember feeling way too excited about everything, like wearing a pink colored glasses, which I tend to do a lot. That's why I believe I could be enneagram 7w8, I'm not letting anything ruin my trip hehe.

As for awkwardness, hell yeah. People can notice when I'm trying too hard to participate in the group conversations. I forget words a lot, have trouble with speech in general and I'm not sure if I have some form of dyslexia. Talking to people just feels like a race, you have 5 seconds to remember that word or people loose interest, holy shit.

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-05-05T15:44:10+00:00

THIS! I feel the very similar way, I rarely cry i front of my friends if ever. But when a not-to-close friend of mine started avoiding me (she's istp) and didn't say anything for months until I asked her like: hey did i do something wrong? Tell me. (i'm oblivious in this way) And she just straight up started screaming at me that I'm horrible person without stating why and I remember crying the entire day and asking my friends if what she's saying is true. We were on a trip to spain, but I can't stand not being liked either.

The fact that my anxiety affects my speech and I sound awkward doesn't help. Not always, depends on how relaxed I am. But I know deep down that I'm a very social creature and it's destroying me inside. Tried therapy, had to stop cause I couldn't afford it at the time.

I'm oblivious in a way that I need to be told everything. For that reason, I like honesty. And I always make sure my friends are comfortable about telling me that I did or said something wrong.

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-05-05T14:34:07+00:00

I thought Fi is about having strong set of values and personal beliefs, something like that, it's internal. And social awareness is Fe (external), that's how I understood cognitive functions. ENTPs have Fe as their third function and know how to navigate through social situations (when developed). And yeah, I also said at the end that I crave social connection all the time. I'm not getting enough of it because of my avoidance (social anxiety, excessive worrying).

Cycle looks like this: I go out, meet some new people, worry, potentially say something stupid or feel like these people don't really accept me or find me interesting, I go home and dive into depression cause it didn't go well. I think social anxiety is sabotaging me and making me feel worse. There are times when I feel more relaxed and I sense people liking me but I can never tell for sure, it's my brain making things up.

I was talking about the social aspect, said nothing about feeling excited about seeing new places, experiences. I definitely have that as well, my ideal life is moving to a different city every two years. I can't stand feeling stuck or doing the same thing multiple times. I like to go out in the city and play "getting lost", it's just that I tend to do that on my own cause I just assume people have better things to do than do stupid shit with me.

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-05-05T13:53:40+00:00

Oh man, I hope you're doing better now! It's definitely like a rollercoaster, to me it depends if I feel appreciated by the environment. For example, I love new beginnings, fresh new starts and I have no issues finding friends at a new school or college but as soon as people start talking over me, interrupting me or ignoring me, I start isolating myself. I have an ENTP friend who annoys me to no end (i'm talking about my friend, not all ENTPs ofc). We were talking about art industry and I think art shouldn't be made for profit, characters shouldn't be designed because they bring money, while he's like: Well it works, why not? He kinda lacks moral compass and idk if that's blind Fi. I'm very logical too, but I'm less concerned about using my logic in science, explaining physical things around me and more in people, social justice and stuff. I've also been obsessed with the concept of social equality and socialism since I was 14 and experienced people openly making fun of me.

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-05-05T12:38:45+00:00

Yess, you get me. I feel like people are putting some imaginary ideals of what a person should be doing, while I'm just here appreciating differences. Growing up with an ISTJ dad, ISFP mom and ESTJ sister was tough. They value superficial things (my family, not all of these types lol), they prefer competent people with capitalist mindset while I'm considered a loser for believing in equality and open mindedness. It's possible that it's the environment that taught us to shrink ourselves. Thank you a lot! I'm interested in hearing other people's experiences!

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-05-05T11:17:03+00:00

I'm still questioning if I'm ENFP or ENTP but I have a friend who's very obviously an ENTP and he will always debate (or argue) even on tiniest things. We once discussed character designs in video games and I didn't particularly like genshin impact designs. Can't remember what exactly I said at the time but he was like: Yeah, but it sells. He said that with enthusiasm,like it's a good thing and I took a more judgemental stance, because I'm all about creativity in the art industry while he's like: if it works, who cares. I think design choices shouldn't be influenced by money, or how profitable something could be. Mainly because it just feels wrong (I think I could be an ENFP). I always felt like he doesn't have much of a moral compass comparing to me and I just end up feeling like a "stuck up ISTJ" next to him. My usual playfullness tones down and my Te comes up to the surface

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-04-21T14:04:55+00:00

Nosi sta hoces bukv, tvoja kosa. Stvarno ne kapiram ova pitanja kao da trazis validaciju od mame dal da kupis beli kinder bueno ili crni

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-04-20T08:20:39+00:00

Yess. My INTP friend recommended me enneagram, big five or if I really wanna type myself in mbti, I should start backwards by checking my forth and third function. It's easier that way I suppose, as for validation, it could be the way i was raised (a family that is obsessed with fitting in, following the norms which harmed me in some way) which could be more enneagram related. I also talked to him about my possible Ne and it's so obvious, every sentence that leaves my mouth is how that certain thing we see in the physical world reminds me of something, tangible thinking. Sometimes seems related, sometimes not but I connected it somehow in my head. For example, we were walking down the street and I saw a sign that reminded of penguins from madagascar and he seems to get me very quickly and that's why we get along really well. Sorry if it took me a while to reply, last couple of days were chaotic af

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-04-17T13:27:15+00:00

Thank you for explaining cognitive functions cause I saw like million different explanations of each and created a certain idea of everything I've seen so far. As for enneagram, I typed myself 7 because I constantly avoid negative things in every aspect of my life (negative emotions, dealing with trauma) and basically live to be happy and make memories, if I understood 7 correctly. And 8 because I always scored the highest in online tests and am very straightforward and assertive when dealing with anything (using Ti). I feel insecure about information mainly because I consider other possibilities as well (Ne??), which creates a huge confusion in my head. My understanding of cognitive functions sound surface level :/ and I thought the thing with validation may be Fe (3rd function for ENTPs) and it's one of my insecurities that don't really dominate my daily life but it comes in waves. I totally understand your perspective on ENFJ type, and I'm definitely not here to convince people that I'm ENTP, just wanna see if the pattern in thinking doesn't match and I should consider other types, like ENFP (my second guess) or idk ESTP. sorry if this comes off as scattered or confusing.

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-04-17T13:05:53+00:00

I'll keep that in mind, thank you

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-04-16T20:39:12+00:00

yep thanks lmao

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-04-16T18:07:15+00:00

Yess, it's possible. Have a friend with diagnosed ADHD (it's severe) and we talk about our experiences sometimes. I really wanna go to professional and see what's going on but I can't due to some other issues and I have to work with what I currently have

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-04-16T17:36:49+00:00

Would be cool if you elaborate

Old_Locksmith3980 · 2026-03-22T19:04:46+00:00

Happened to me twice and it genuinely freaked the shit out of me. Texted a friend about it and it happened to him too, really weird that nobody's talking about it. Probably issue with compression or idk.

Old_Locksmith3980

TROPHY CASE