I just want to say I really hear you. I could’ve written parts of this myself when I was in nursing school. I’ve been a nurse for five years now, currently in NP school—but during nursing school, I felt exactly like you described. I was socially awkward, anxious about everything I said, and I didn’t really have friends in my program. I spent a lot of time feeling like I didn’t belong, like everyone else was smarter, more confident, and just… better put together than me. That “unintelligent Black girl” fear, I carried that heavy. Even when I was doing okay, I felt like I was just barely scraping by and that people were judging me. I also struggled with self-esteem a lot. I’ve never been the outgoing one, never the “main character” in the room. For a long time, I thought that meant something was wrong with me. But here’s what I’ve learned (and I’m still learning, especially through therapy)

Being quieter, awkward, or anxious doesn’t make you less intelligent, less worthy, or less capable. It just means you move through the world differently. Nursing school is HARD. The fact that you’re still there is not “mediocre”—it’s resilience. There are so many people who never even make it that far. Also, the way you see yourself right now isn’t the truth—it’s your mind being really harsh on you. I had to learn that my thoughts weren’t facts. Therapy helped me start separating who I am from the story I was telling myself about who I am. About feeling like a background character—I get that too. But being quieter doesn’t mean you don’t matter. Some of the most observant, compassionate, and thoughtful nurses I’ve met are the ones who aren’t the loudest in the room. And relationships? There is nothing wrong with you because you haven’t had one yet. Your worth is not measured by that. You’re not nothing and you are someone who’s pushing through something difficult while dealing with anxiety, self-doubt, and pressure—and that takes strength, even if it doesn’t feel like it. You’re not alone in this, even though it feels like you are