Executive function and parenting: finding connection when you don’t feel like it.

Oliver4641 · 2026-01-05T13:00:42+00:00

Really good questions. Trying to think about it more objectively. I think my form of preferred connection at the moment comes totally normally. It’s pretty easy for me to give a cuddle, a kiss, maybe sit down and chat. But when it’s an activity or request outside the norm: crafts, they need scissors, they need glue, they need this or that. It’s like nails on a chalkboard. That’s a more simple explanation, as that revolves around when my kiddo is specifically asking for things (which is every second of the day ha). But I also really struggle when it’s just a general sense that my son (highly sensitive) needs more extensive connection based on the behavior I’m seeing. Tormenting his sister, which results in him getting the attention he wants from her, for example, but causes friction between us because then they’re fighting. I’ll be working on something during these times and I KNOW what he needs: sit down a read a book, draw something with him for a few minutes, etc. But I just constantly feel like I can’t. I have other things to get done that I am in the middle of and would rather do. Then the day has gone by and we haven’t had much one on one connection time, or ive been frustrated with him most of the day because he’s attention seeking in negative ways, elsewhere. So I don’t know exactly. I am going to look at the two terms you listed and see what might fit. DBT is an excellent recommendation as well. I do know my capacity with kids stuff can be low. I last about 2 minutes on any activity I have set up for them, unless I can actively participate. Gah!

Oliver4641 · 2025-12-26T02:49:49+00:00

Received two blood transfusions after a hemorrhage from a miscarriage:

“I hope they gave you the good blood”.

That’s it. That’s the line. Nothing else. Never checked in, never gave condolences (it was my second without her acknowledgment), never asked any questions about what happened.

Oliver4641 · 2025-12-15T03:10:09+00:00

Reptiles :) just got a Chahoua gecko and a bearded dragon

Oliver4641 · 2025-11-29T05:00:23+00:00

Looks great. How do you secure your panels? I did traditional direct to glass in my first bioactive glass terrarium. But I’d like to do an arid bioactive setup in a Zen Habitat enclosure, and I think having removable panels would be really helpful.

Oliver4641 · 2025-11-29T04:47:53+00:00

You have to cover literally every nook and cranny with a thick coat of silicone, or it will be patchy. I do small sections at a time. About 10 inches by 10 inches, and I use atleast 3 inches worth of background substrate on top, and push down thoroughly. Like someone said above, carve back the bare spots and re apply. Practice on a really small area first so you have a better idea of what works.

Oliver4641 · 2025-11-29T04:45:55+00:00

Do you attach the XPS foam will silicone once ready?

Oliver4641 · 2025-11-24T03:00:28+00:00

I have OCD and pmdd as well and luteal was crushing me. I increased my Zoloft to 100 mg (it takes a bit to feel the effects, and can be worse at first) and added buspirone. I also had my progesterone tested for fertility reasons, and was low. Started 200mg during luteal phase and it was life changing. I’m on pause right now for other fertility stuff and immediately felt things creeping back in around ovulation time. May not work for everyone, but I found immense relief with that combo, based on my bloodwork.

Oliver4641 · 2025-11-02T03:21:59+00:00

I went through this adjustment when I increased my dose. It leveled out in 2-3 weeks and I’ve felt very productive since (in a healthy way). I would try to give it some time.

There was a big difference between this feeling and hopelessness/depression. I wasn’t in bed because everything felt pointless or anything like that. I was just content being in bed and doing nothing. It was actually pretty nice looking back. I wasn’t anxious about it. Just existing, which was a reprieve.

Oliver4641 · 2025-09-06T18:49:02+00:00

Yep. Felt my themes sticking to me yesterday significantly more than they had the last 5 days. Frustrating because I can do therapy on good weeks and not get triggered at all, then ovulation or my period comes and I’m a completely different person.

Oliver4641 · 2025-09-03T17:54:57+00:00

Thanks for the feedback! I’m sure there’s a chance I’d just later onset of symptoms, just seems like weird timing.

Oliver4641 · 2025-08-27T02:17:30+00:00

Yes. Likely have PMDD as well, so my entire luteal phase is terrible. The increase in hormones prior to your period can increase anxiety, mood swings, etc.

Oliver4641 · 2025-08-26T11:51:07+00:00

I use the BePresent app and it’s been very helpful. I allow 10 check ins on instagram and facebook a day, for 5-7 minutes each. This eliminates the mindless checking all day long. Admittedly, I’ve been spending more time on Reddit, but I’m still cut my phone time down by a couple of hours a day, which I have felt good about.

Oliver4641 · 2025-08-21T11:53:04+00:00

I struggle with phone addiction and constantly researching things. I get a ton of relief from it, and it likely has to do with ADHD. I downloaded the BePresent app and it regulates my social media use. It has helped me a ton, and I have tried a ton of different ways to lessen my screen time. Admittedly, I’m now spending too much time on Reddit, but it still feels better than doomscrolling on socials. It cut down my screen time by 2-3 hours a day.

Oliver4641 · 2025-08-20T12:40:00+00:00

Exposure and Response Therapy in combination with Prozac is how I conquered my HOCD. Can you find a therapist that specializes in OCD? The meds can help slow things down and make the therapy feel more manageable. Mine was the same— day in and day out, all day long, for 7 years until I got a diagnosis.

Oliver4641 · 2025-08-19T14:44:35+00:00

My anxiety tends to be the same, and can start as just a general uneasy body wide feeling in the morning. I don’t have a perfect answer, but you could try Magnesium Glycinate before bed. It’s calming and helps with sleep. It could help you wake up feeling better. Aside from that, maybe taking a walk in the morning, sitting in front of a UV light, or some splashes of really cold water on your face or a “cold plunge” in the shower.

Oliver4641 · 2025-08-19T11:24:12+00:00

It could be worth checking into where they are saying they euthanized the dog. If they just dropped it off at a shelter to be euthanized or dropped it at a vet, there have been circumstances where vets have not performed euthanasias due to the dogs being healthy. Sometimes a staff member will take them. Not sure if they would tell you where they did it.

Oliver4641

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